Dr. Video, A Sailor Moon MSTing BY: Dr. Thinker MSTIED BY: Seth C. Triggs CO-MSTIED BY: Jamie Jeans SETH C. TRIGGS: This is certainly going to be an interesting challenge: Keep my sanity with these silly riffs of Dr. Thinker's. He's a nice guy and all...but... well, on with the show!! Good thing Jamie Jeans is helping me out!! :) JAMIE JEANS: It is really nice to be working with someone again, especially someone as talented as Lefty here. Mainly, I'm in charge of the Host segments and editing. But I'll also be adding some riffs where I can. LEGAL STUFF: All the characters and concepts of Mystery Science Theater 3000 belongs to Best Brains Inc. The fanfic originally MSTied belongs to its creator. The MSTing of the fanfic belongs to Dr. Thinker. Now, on to the show!!! ________________________________________________________________________ Dr. Forrester grunted as he gave the bolt one final twist. Stepping back from his latest invention, he used the sleeve of his lab coat to wipe sweat away from his brow. What he had just finished would be the ultimate invention of evil, a device which would help him to keep control of the world once he found the fanfic or movie that broke Mike and the bot's spirits. "Frank," he called out. "Have you got the fanfic ready to send up?" "I sure do, Clayton," TV's Frank replied, coming to stand beside him. "Good. Now contact Mike and his two walking trash bins. I want to show off my invention before I submit them to their weekly experiment." "You got it," Frank replied. Walking up to the control board, the assistant quickly called up Mike and the bots. SATELLITE OF LOVE "You got that new invention done," Tom Servo asked. "Yeah, the Mads are calling," Crow T. Robot added as he noticed the red light blinking. Mike Nelson, dressed in his usual green jumpsuit, growled as he twisted something in his hands. Finally losing his patience with the unseen object, he took up a hammer from the counter and started pounding on it. After a few swings, he smiled and brought up a bright pink cube, placing the hammer on the conter. "Now I'm done," he said, pressing the red light. DEEP 13 Dr. Forrester and Frank stood before the camera, dressed in their respective clothing and smiling brightly into it. "Hello, Guinea pigs. And how are you doing today," Dr. Forrester asked. SATELLITE OF LOVE "We're doing fine, sir," Mike replied. "Why, everything is going a-okay up here," Tom added. DEEP 13 "Good. Now why don't we move onto the invention exchange before today's experiment. Since mine is infinitely better then yours, I shall go first," Dr. Forrester said. "Frank?" The assistant wheeled a pitch black VCR the size of a human chest on a cart into view. On the top was a large red button and a large green button. Beside it was a dial with a panel showing what setting the invention was currently on. Along the sides of the black box was a ring of small projectors. It was evident from his panting and the sheen of sweat on his forehead that the invention was quite heavy. When he had pushed it beside the evil scientist, he collapsed to the floor, breathing heavily. "This," Dr. Forrester pointed at the camera. "Is the means by which I shall maintain control of the world." SATELLITE OF LOVE Needless to say, Mike and the bots were stunned. Or was it stupefied? DEEP 13 "I can see by your reaction that you are awed by the sheer look of my invention," Dr. Forrester said. "Well, allow me to show you the true reason why you should be scared of it. Frank, show them why." Lifting himself off the floor, Frank took a few seconds to get his breath back before pressing the big green button. As the machine hummed to life, the evil scientist explained its workings. "What this machine does, essentially, is take the worst scenes from a fanfic and movie and store them in its hard drive. From there, it selects the worst of the worst and reruns them over and over again." "For example, we can replay all the sex scenes from A-ko: The College Years over and over again," Frank added, finally getting to his feet. "The dial here is for the speed for which the scenes are ran at. It is currently set at slow." Everyone closed their eyes as a large, five foot by five foot hologram, displaying the said scene for all to see. Being careful to shield his eyes from the horrid sex scene, Dr. Forrester continued his explanation. "And of course, the ever important off button." Frank, keeping his eyes averted from the hologram, groped for the off button and pressed it. Nothing. "Uh... Clayton?" "You idiot! You didn't wire the stop button correctly," Dr. Forrester shouted. "But you worked..." "Details, details!!! Just find a way to turn it off!" "But Clayton, it's powered by a miniature cold fusion battery! It won't run out for the next thousand years!" "You fool! You idiot!" Dr. Forrester ran out of insults. SATELLITE OF LOVE "I guess we can go now," Tom said. "This invention," Crow started and Mike held up the control cube to the hexscreen. "Is for hero's who have very little time to change." "Based on Mihoshi's control cube, this device allows any superhero to change from their normal clothing into their suit in only a few seconds," Tom continued. "Mike shall demonstrate." Mike twisted the cube a few times in a certain pattern. A circle of yellow light appeared above his head and came down over his body. Contouring to his form as it went lower, his green jumpsuit was replaced with the red and blue suit of Spider-man. Twis ting the cube in a different order, another circle of light came down over the temp, replacing the Spider-man costume with that of Superman's, flowing cape and all. "And we must not forget all the vigilantes and villains out there," Tom said. "After all, we want this product to be available to everyone. This means that it can change your clothing to normal, every day wear, as well as expensive suits." Twisting the cube in a third pattern, the circle of light came down over Mike, replacing the Superman costume with an expensive Armani suit. A fourth, twisting, pattern gave Mike the normal Japanese school fuku, commonly worn by characters such as Usagi and A-ko. "Uh... Mike? You might want to change," Crow suggested. The temp quickly twisted the cube. "Let me guess: you see London, you see France..." "Exactly." Mike finished the pattern that would restore his jumpsuit and waited patiently for it. When nothing came, he twisted the cube again and still no circle of light. "I guess the batteries have to be replaced," Tom said. "I *told* you not to get the no-names," Mike said. DEEP 13 Frank and Dr. Forrester were pounding at the Bad Scene Rerunner with sledgehammers while wearing darkened glasses to protect them from seeing the sex scenes. Things were not going so good for the duo as they continued to miss the invention and bring the hammer down on their feet. "Owww!!! Oh, I'm in a bad mood now, Nelson. I was going to send you a nice SM fanfic, but after hurting myself so many times, I need something to cheer me up! And nothing will cheer me up like seeing you two suffer! Prepare for another Dr. Thinker MSTing!!!" Turning to Frank, the evil scientist nodded and the assistant blindly made his way to the button, tripping over the sledgehammer he had dropped and falling onto the button. SATELLITE OF LOVE Mike growled at the cube and threw it to the floor, stomping on it a few times. Little did he notice that two circles of light appeared over Tom and Crow, dressing them both in Sailor Senshi fuku's. "Mike," they both shouted at him. "Oops! Sorry guys." All of a sudden, the lights started to flash and the sirens started up. "Oh, we've got MSTied fanfic sign," the bots shouted, rushing into the theater. "I guess we'll have to change *after* the fanfic," Mike commented, running in after the bots. (DOOR SEQUENCE) 7... 6... 5... 4... 3... 2... 1... TOM: We're gonna get you for this Mike. MIKE: I'm sorry... Which scout are you dressed up as anyhow? TOM: Sailor Jupiter. CROW: Sailor Mercury here. > This takes place before Dr. Death and Dr. Mite in the time lines > for MST300. MIKE: The MST300?! CROW: Boy, those British and their motorways... > This takes place durning Dr. Forrester and TV's Frank > are working in DEEP 13 as Mike is one the sattile. Stay tune > for.......... TOM: Mannix! CROW: The Flash! MIKE: Xena: The Warrior Princess! > DR. VIDEO > by a Sailor Moon misting by Dr. Thinker > Original by Amy Bridger. CROW: That's a lot of *by's*. TOM: I wish this fic would go *by*. MIKE: Come on, it hasn't even started yet! TOM: But it's made by Dr. Thinker!!! > NOTE TO MRS. A. Bridger: This is a funny C&C. Hope you don't > mind. MIKE: Actually, C & C, I don't mind. It's your grammar that bugs me. CROW: Isn't that Captain Bridger's wife? > NOTE TO LAWYERS: MST300 is owned by Best Brain. Sailor Moon is > owned by Toei/Dic. Please do not sue. MIKE: [Thinker] Don't hurt me!! Please? > NOTE TO Mr. McLess: Put it on your web page. CROW: I'll pay you fifty bucks! > NOTE TO FAN: E-Mail at WINKSTWO@SSSNET.COM TOM: [Sylvester] SSSuffferin' SSSuccotash!! MIKE: I've got to get a cloth. > ----------------------------------------------------------- >[SOL] > > Mike: Yo! What up? CROW: Well, it's Pimp Master Mike!! MIKE: Crow... > Can't get a date? Or just couch potato look > for a few laughs. > Crow: Then you will need "Criker's Laughe Colene". Just on stiff ALL: EWWWWWWWWWW!!! TOM: [snickers] Hey, Mike...shouldn't you hit Crow for that? CROW: Hey! > of nose of you best friend - boy or girl with make your win!" MIKE: A NEW CAR!! > Mike: (taking a sniff) Yuck! What did you make that with, Crow? > Crow: Tom did. > Mike: TOM!!!! MOVE SIGN!!!!!!! TOM: HEY!! Don't yell at me, Mike!! MIKE: Tom...it's *that* Mike. TOM: This is getting confusing. > Tom: (off-screen) I don't see any light moving. MIKE: Their light moves?! Wow! Ours just blinks. > Crow: Oh, well. I forget what you mind "Criker's Laughe Colene" > out of, > Tom: (off-screen) I NEVER REVEAL!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! CROW: [Tom Servo] ...why in the world I keep an underwear collection! TOM: [whiny] Don't riff me, Crow! > Mike: (goes to hit the Mad's light, but hits the under-side of > the control panel Oh, Docs! Tom needs a movie. > Crow: (voice as Dr. F) Then I have new story by Dr. Thinker that > might make him roll over dead or melt him into scrap metal. MIKE: Actually, it would make his head explode. > Tom: NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!! NOT THAT!!! CROW: You need to tone down on the caffeine intake, buddy. TOM: Oh, bite me. > Crow: (voice as Frank) You can stay out of the theather if you > tell me what you make Criker's Colene. > Tom: (off-screen) Melted piples, three pairs of underwear, two > pillow, five pills, two small cans of oil, two tapes contains, > mix and cook into the Sattile's Reactor. Happy now. CROW: Tom!! You stole that recipe from C-ko, didn't you? TOM: Crow... > Crow: (voice as Dr. F) Ok! Happy, Mike. > Tom: (entering the screen) YOU TRICK ME!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! CROW: And it's that easy! TOM: Hey! > Crow: You telling me? MIKE: Ehhhh?? > (Mad's lights shines) > Magic Voice: Bowser and the Kids are hunting > Crow: Where's Mario when you need him. CROW: Shameless... Nintendo plug?!! From *me*? TOM: Okay, I call a moratorium on meta-riffs. CROW: You would. TOM: Crow... MIKE: Guys, let's riff the fic. >[DEEP 13] > > Dr. Forrester: Nice trick, Crow. I have a vister. I tell him the > reason why he's here and not in his lab in Akron, Ohio. Let's go > Frank. MIKE: [Frank] To Akron? Oh, goody!! I've always wanted to see the Soap Box Derby!! >(TV's Frank and Dr. Forrester exit thought DEEP 13's vault door. > We pan to couch. In which, a man in yellow shirt and pants > covered by a yellow lab coat stand on-screen) > Man: Greeting, Mario and friends. I'm Dr. Thinker!!! ALL: ARRRRGGGHHHH!! CROW: Yes, even Doc Thinker has sunk to the lowest low...self- insertion. MIKE: This is a sad day indeed. > The reason > I'm hear is that Dr. Forrester has to watch other Mad Sciencest TOM: [Thinker] Cause he's the Mad Sciencest!! [sheepishly]...ehhh...ooohhh. > in the MAD SCIENCE GAMES. I used a robot in the last game. So I > punish by taking over. I HATE TAKING OVER somesles job. I rather > be writing. MIKE: Or an incredible simulation. > You story today is a rotten piece of Sailor Moon > fan-fic which should I have stay in Amy's computer. > Mike: (Off-screen) As in Sailor Mercury? > Dr. Thinker: No. Silly rabbit. CROW: Trix are for prostitutes! MIKE: Crow!! CROW: I know, out of left field again...Sheesh. > As in Amy Brigder, a Sailor Moon > fan. And it's called "Video Night at Mako-Chan's". TOM: If that ain't a lemon title, I don't know *what* is! MIKE: Oh, brother. >[SOL] > Mike: It can't be do bad. > Crow & Tom: Bite us! CROW: Let's not and say we did. MIKE: I couldn't agree with you more! >7:15PM 21/01/98 > Tom: She dated the fan-fiction. > Crow: Do not read after this date. TOM: Hey, that's a pretty good riff, Crow! CROW: Tom... remember your moratorium? >Video Night at Mako-chan's > Mike: This fan-fiction is rated NC-17 > Crow: (To the music of FAME) Sex, I want some sexual moves!! > Mike: Crow!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! MIKE: I'm sure this is not going to be *that* bad. TOM: I can't believe you made a "Fame" ref, Crow. CROW: >By Amy Bridger (ami@full-moon.com) CROW: Full Moon? Oh, like one of those bend-over ladies you find in a lawn in Cheektowaga, NY. > Mike: She is a werewolf! > Crow: Gets new meaning to "Bite me!" > Tom: That was a bad joke! > ALL: (groans) MIKE: Full Moon...wouldn't that imply that she is a plumber? CROW: That's one butt crack *I* wouldn't mind seeing! TOM AND MIKE: CROW!!! >Story Copyright by Amy Bridger 1997, Characters Copyright by >Toei. > Tom: Where's Dic? TOM: Between--mmmpph!! MIKE: [with hand over Tom's mouth] NO! > Crow: I think that might been a good thing! > Mike: Have you wreck the Dic's dubbed enough? > Crow & Tom: NEVER!! > Mike: Why do I put up with those guys? CROW: I can't believe they were word playing with Dic. MIKE: Crow, watch it. >Want to write something fun and fast paced. Also something which MIKE: Will bore the living daylights out of people. > Tom: Out of gate, and Amy get forget the letter...I. > Crow: As in... I'm sick of this fan-fiction. > Tom: We just started Crow. TOM: [makes revving noises] Trashy robot activated! CROW: Don't go there, Tom. >looks at the senshi vs. normal identity kinda thing. MIKE: Normal? I guess that leaves Serena/Usagi out. > Tom: This is going to be something look a monster find out about > the Sailor Scouts identity and becomes good. TOM: What the hell did I just say?! >I can't be bothered keeping the seasons straight so expect to >see attacks and transformations from all seasons. CROW: I guess Amy is one of those folks that sleds in the summer? > Mike: She need to visit...http://www.tcp.com/doi. > Crow: I thought you said "NO PLUGS!!!" > Mike: That's was Joel. > Crow & Tom: (crying) > Mike: Oh, fudge! I forget if I say that name, they start crying > their heads off. MIKE: Hey!! I didn't know *that*! TOM: Believe me, we're over it by now. >Warning: There's nudity, words like "etchi", Japanese phrases >scattered throughout, and very little of Rei. CROW: Well, I thought Rei was adequately endowed... MIKE: Crow... > Mike: What is etchi? > Crow: The japanese word for prevent....I MIGHT like this fan-fic. TOM: [Smokey the Bear] Only *you* can prevent crappy fanfiction! > Tom: Bite me! CROW: As you wish! [bites TOM] TOM: CROW!! MIKE, he bit me!! MIKE: Crow, do you want a time-out? CROW: I'll be good! >I've often not put who says what when the girls are discussing >something. This is either because it doesn't really matter who MIKE: ... wrote this story... because it's gonna suck. > Crow: Amy Briger's order at Chaos - the newest fast-food place... > Mike: CHAOS REIGNS SUPREME...one to go? > Crow: Right, Mike? TOM: One *what* to go? MIKE: A brain? CROW: My head hurts. >says what or because I think it's pretty easy to tell who says >what or both. > Tom: As if. MIKE: Alicia Silverstone *is* Tom Servo. >"Romeo, Romeo, where for art thou Romeo?" Juliet's voice came MIKE: [Romeo] What brick through yonder windshield breaks? > Mike: Thou is trap by your father in the sky around the ground > called the "Earth". CROW: Isn't *all* of the sky around the ground? MIKE: Hush, child... >from the tv set in Makoto's apartment. 5 girls sighed in unsion. >1 girl said "Taikutsu! Boring!" TOM: Two bots and a human said..."Fic! Boring!" > Mike: I drink to that. > Crow: You don't have a drink to drink, Mike. CROW: Man!! This version of me steps on everyone's lines!! What gives? >"You wanted to come Chibi-Usa so you put up with the movie!" > Crow: You have watch sex with me or Darrien.... ALL: ARRRRRRGGGHHHHHH!!! MIKE: I can't believe you went there, Crow!! Chibi-usa?!! CROW: GYAH!! > Mike: CROW!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! > Tom: Mike, my ears are blooding.... > Mike: You don't have ears, Tom. TOM: I don't even have blood. >Usagi yelled. MIKE: A gun was fired, lightning flashed, and a pirate ship appeared on the horizon... > Tom: (Usagi) I hate to do that. But I'm not Queen Neo-Serenity! CROW: Doesn't she yell anyway? >Chibi-Usa poked her tounge out. MIKE: It fell to the floor, limp and covered in blood. TOM: Feeling a little dark today, Mike? > ALL: EEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWW!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! CROW: That's eighteen E's, twenty-two W's, and fifteen exclamation marks. MIKE: Are we bored? > Usagi stood and started to move >towards her. >"Cool it you two," said Makoto. > Mike: (Usagi) With what, cold ice? CROW: [Makoto] Thanks for stepping all over my line, Usagi. >"Yeah, we want to be able to hear the movie!" Rei said. > Tom: Great move, Rei! You not as dumb as you look. TOM: Now Minako, on the other hand... >As if on cue, the VCR make a burbling noise. The picture on >screen distorted and became snowy. The picture flipped over and >over. MIKE: Hey, I didn't know GM made VCR's! CROW: You've been watching too much Dateline NBC. > Mike: The VCR explodes killing all them. > Tom & Crow: Get real. TOM: Get a life. MIKE: Should have bought a Pioneer. CROW: They don't make VCR's. > The sound continued undisturbed. 5 girls looked dismayed. 1 >girl shouted "Banzai!" Makoto got up and banged the VCR a few >times, suceeding only in making the picture worse. MIKE: Silly girl!! You're supposed to hit the *TV*! Everyone knows that! > Tom: Try using your thunder power, Jutiper? > Mike: That really with make the VCR explode into millions of tiny > pieces. CROW: Hey, guys...have you noticed that Doc Thinker's getting a little more coherent? I almost understood what that last sentence meant! TOM: Yeah...I would cry if I could! *sniff* >"Great now what are we going to do?" MIKE: Fix all this huge space in the document! > Mike: You can a hike to watch that last sentai team working on > their show. TOM: Oh, Masked Rider? CROW: Maybe it's the Power Rangers. MIKE: I'm glad we didn't have *their* costume programmed into the Costume Cube. >"We could study for the english test on Monday," suggested Ami. > Mike: (Ami) And math test on Tuesday. > Crow: (Ami) And the sexual test on Wednesday. > Mike: Crow!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! CROW: Silly me...this is Ami we're talking about. MIKE: Crow... >The other girls groaned. TOM: (ala Serena from "Maximum Carnage") Can't you ever think about anything that's not books? >Mike: (Amy) Can I make them groan or what!!! > Crow: That was sick. MIKE: Not really. > Mike: And your sex full jokes are clean? CROW: Not really, heh, heh. >"We could watch a film in english. I get the English Channel," >countered Makoto. TOM: The...English Channel. MIKE: 24 Hours of Britcoms and Masterpiece Theatre! ALL: Huh-zah!! CROW: Actually, that's a pretty good lineup. > Tom: (Other girls) We don't speak English well... > Crow: Minako and Amy do. > Mike: Why that? > Crow: Minako spend some time in England and Amy is smart. > Tom: I prefer Power Rangers to Sailor Moon. MIKE: Uhhhh...wha? TOM: Looks like the riffing is branching out a bit? >"But I don't speak english well!" wailed Usagi. CROW: Sounds like you're doing fine now! MIKE: What?! CROW: I SAID THAT IT SOUNDS LIKE YOU'RE DOING FINE NOW!!! MIKE: WHAT!!! > Crow: Ask Amy to help. MIKE: Just because Ami's smart doesn't mean she knows English. >"There's subtitles in english and japanese," said Makoto. > Tom: WOW! The Japanese had stacked the deck of televison. MIKE: Uhhhh? TOM: Can somebody please remind me which is the fanfic and which is the riffing? >Makoto flicked over to the English Channel. MIKE: [Makoto] One English Channel and nothing's on!! TOM: Rats! Nothing but reruns on! > Crow: But she missed a flicked to a hentai show... > Mike: Crow!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! CROW: I dunno, Absolutely Fabulous gets pretty raunchy sometimes... > A group of 5 > Tom: Stupid ghost girls fighting a giant green-haired girl. > Crow: Tom, your last riff contain a lot of g, r and s. > Mike: Bet you don't want to say that one five time fast? TOM: Ehhhhh?? CROW: I guess more coherent means less understandable. MIKE: Another large space. CROW: Just like in... MIKE: CROW! CROW: Greg Thompson's. What? You're so sensitive. >costumed superheros were fighting a giant gold monkey. [1] TOM: [The Count] One! One Bad Fanfic! Ah, ah, ah!! > Tom: They have POWER RANGERS in JAPANESE!!! PLEASE TELL ME THIS A > DREAM. > Crow: It IS NOT A DREAM, or Dr. F and Frank will riffing this. > Tom: AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAARRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRGHHH >(Tom's head explodes) MIKE: What? TOM: I think my head *will* really explode from trying to figure that out!! CROW: Um, isn't Power Rangers Japanese *anyway*? >"I thought JuRanger was a Japanese show?" asked Minako. >(Tom's head returns) > Tom: Yes, it was until it was turn into a stupid American show. MIKE: Ah, how true, dopple Tom. >"This is the bad english dub of it. It's so funny!" Makoto TOM: [Makoto] What is Saban smoking? And can I have some of it? > Mike: As if, we get some shows...only two were funny. > Crow: "The Putty Pig" eposides right? > Mike: Bingo. CROW: *Putty Pig*? TOM: Oh, don't you remember? The ones where Rita made a monster pig to eat the Power Ranger's power weapons? CROW: Fanboy! >explained, "After this there's a beginner english show on. > Mike: That's Amy for you. MIKE: *What's* Ami for you? TOM: What is Ami for any of us? Is it a name? Or merely a collection of letters thrown together to represent someone? CROW: Very philosophical... and redundant. >It'll be very educational Ami-chan. Plus the guy in it looks >just like my old boyfriend!" Sweatdrops appeared on everyone's >heads. ALL: [singing] Sweatdrops keep falling on my head, yes... CROW: Hey, she isn't talking about Mr. Rogers, is she? MIKE & TOM: [shudder] > Crow: You can't get away for sweatdrops, can't you. > Tom: It is based on ANIME. MIKE: More capitalized acronyms? I guess Adam Chance is on the way... TOM: They're after my cardigan... >They settled back and watched the last 15 minutes of the show. > Tom: Great, they miss the first stupid 15 minutes of the show. TOM: Actually, all 30 minutes of the show are stupid. >Even Chibi-Usa wasn't bored as the show was made for people >about her age. When the show finished the girls started talking >about it instead of watching the commercials. CROW: [Ami] Wow!! That show came from Japan? What were we thinking?! > Tom: Which would have not been good for his fan-fic. MIKE: I agree. This fanfic must have been made without thinking. >"That was so pathetic, it was funny!" > Crow: Pathic sex, anyone? > Mike: Crow!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! TOM: What's *pathic* sex? CROW: I haven't the foggiest...although it could include Deanna Troi. MIKE: Get Seven of Nine, for crying out loud! TOM: That's it! No more Voyager shows for you. >"I don't believe they turned Boi [2] into a girl!" CROW: Looks like Boi [2] had a Wilcox operation. > Crow: Who's Boi? > Tom: I think she was trying for Boy, the Saba-Tooth Ranger that > Saban turn into Trini, the Yellow Power Ranger. MIKE & CROW: FANBOY!!!! >"Goshi was much cuter!" > Crow: Who's he? > Mike: Can I take a crack at it? TOM: Now Mike's the plumber. MIKE: Tom... > Tom: (Candle from Beauty and the Best) Be my quest. > Mike: He's the one that Saban got for the footage for Zack's > Black Ranger. > Crow: Oh. CROW: YES, more about Power Rangers than you EVER in your wildest dreams wanted to KNOW!! MIKE: A bit sarcastic, Crow? CROW: Just a bit. >"Jason looked just like my old boyfriend!" TOM: Man. Didn't see THAT coming. > Tom: Makoto, you are getting silly? > Crow: This might just be a silly fan-fiction. MIKE: Ya don't say! >"The floating head in a glass was just plain weird!" > Tom: Zordan is of course weird, he is an alien. CROW: In a bong... Woohoo!!! >"I couldn't keep up with the subtitles." > Tom: Usagi is a slow as a slug, why did they parents name her > after the japanese word for slug? TOM: You just answered your own question, dipstick!! MIKE: Tom, do you realize who you just insulted? TOM: D'oh!! > Crow: Noako had to use Usagi, and her slow is sometime a joke in > the original series in Japan. > Tom: Been reading web pages? > Crow: Yep. CROW: I'm sorry...but this is getting annoying. TOM: How can you say that? I thought you liked the Sailor Senshi? CROW: I don't like them *that* much! >"Shhh the next show's starting." > Tom: That's must be Amy. MIKE: How can you tell? TOM: I guess the next show is How to Love Calculus. >Pretty music and comtemperay images accompained the opening to CROW: Sailor Moon, right? > Mike: I feel like at Wheel of Fortune game. > Crow: Really? > Mike: No. TOM: Let's Make A Deal, then? >English Have A Go. 2 annouceners announced what was coming up in >the show and introduced themselves in very slow english. MIKE: English Have a Go? > Tom: Japanese are slow as days in March? ALL: BOOOOO!! CROW: For shame, Dr. Thinker!!! TOM: I guess he's Dr. Kintobor now. JAMIE: I shall smite his piddly little a**!!! MIKE: Whoa!!! TOM: I guess we touched a nerve with the author there. > Crow: Why did you change the saying? > Tom: I can't say the other two words. TOM: WHAT WORDS!!! >(Author - In the real word, I'm can't spell them) MIKE: We could have told you that! >"Hello, I'm Joyce," said the female. > Mike: Of the Arc. CROW: Female of the arc or *Joyce* of the Arc. TOM: Not an exciting catchphrase, is it? >"And I'm Brian," said the male. > Mike: (Brain) Where is Pinky? > Crow: (Pinky) Right here, Brain? What are we going do tonight? > Mike: (Brain) Show bad movies to 3 other mouses > Crow: (Pinky) Cool. Narf! MIKE: Mouses? CROW: Meeces. TOM: I hate you meeces to pieces!! MIKE: That was a lame reference to Biker Mice from Mars. CROW: I wouldn't mind having one of their bikes. They could do anything! >"Welcome to English Have A Go. We hope you can improve your >english." > Crow: Japanese are too hard to teach english too. MIKE: What? TOM: Thinker, don't go there!! CROW: Too late, he went there. CROW: If you need spoiler space in your fanfics, call Amy Bridger!! 336-4GAP! >"And have fun too." > Mike: As if! MIKE: [Mike] We want to spend our time insulting Japan! >"Today the Jones' family buys Andy a birthday present." CROW: Nudge, nudge... wink, wink... > Tom: From the worst store in the world. TOM: Wal-mart. >"We'll learn some grammar." > Tom: And spelling too. CROW: How about some syntax while you're at it!! >"Professor Sayit will help you with your pronoucination." Ami > ALL: (laughing) MIKE: What's so funny? TOM: This fic! It sucks!! >and Minako laughed at the professor's name, getting them some >weird looks. CROW: [Minako & Amy] Oh, excuse *us*, humorless cretins! > Mike: May be, this WILL NOT BE BAD after all. > Crow: Really? > Mike: May be. TOM: ARRRRGGHHHH!! What the HELL is going on?!! CROW: Screwing up the English language as we know it. >"And meet some Australian families." > Tom: That look and sound British, but act differently. MIKE: Well, duh!! >"But first the Jones' family." > Tom: Of the space kind. CROW: No, George... Jetson? >"This is the guy that's really cute," Makoto said pointing as >Andy Jones appeared. > Crow: Makoto, you will have sex will anyone... even me. > Mike: Crow!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! TOM: That's a lot of exclamation points, Mike. Leave some for us! MIKE: Tom... CROW: About fifty-one exclamation marks, to be precise. >"Hi, I'm Andy Jones. I'm a university student." As he introduced >his family they appeared onscreen doing their jobs. > Mike: Being a pains in the neck. > Crow: That's Dr. Forrester job. > Tom: Don't forget Dr. Thinker. CROW: No, it's not Dr. Thinker who's the pain, it's this incoherent plot!!! TOM: Do you realize that the riffs have more plot cul-de-sacs than the story?! MIKE: Are these spoiler spaces or plotholes? CROW: Both. >The next shot showed his mother sitting on the sofa and Andy >playing on a computer. > Tom: Which is really, a Japanese Playstation. TOM: BOOOOO!!! CROW: Did J.B. Graham write this? >"Andy, what do you want for your brithday?" the mother asked, in >very slow english, "A computer game? A new CD?" > Crow: Sex with you, pay up, > Mike: Crow!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! MIKE: Crow, you didn't go there, did you? Please say you didn't just say that!! CROW: I swear! I didn't! TOM: Andy's from Alabama, apparently. >"I want a motorbike," Andy pulled funny faces while he talked >slowly, over exaggerating his expressions. The show continued >talking about Andy's birthday and ended with him getting a >motorbike. CROW: A motorbike for a boy who just hit on his mother... oooh... TOM: Makes you wonder what Mackie would get for his birthday for peeking in on Sylia. >The girls talked over top of the questions that the presentors >were asking about the skit except Ami who attempted to answer. CROW: Must... not... pass out... from... run on... sentence... >"He is so cute!" exclaimed Minako, "Specially when he makes >those faces!" MIKE: [Minako] I *love* how he gives me the raspberry!! Oooohhh!! > Crow: You getting stupid again, Mr. Bridger? > Mike: (Mr. Brigder) Should I place a stupid remark, here. Yeah, I should. TOM: Actually, *both* of those were stupid remarks. NEXT! >"But whats with the weird accents? I could barely understand >them!" complaned Usagi. CROW: Ask Luna. She's got a weird accent too. > Tom: Why don't you a some grammer and spelling. MIKE: You're one to talk!! TOM: You know, some syntax and sentence structure, and we're there. >"It's an Australian show," said Makoto, "After a couple of shows >you get used to the accents." > Mike: Looks like the goes the last of Makoto's brain cells. CROW: But isn't *Minako* the airhead? TOM: Look! There they are, floating away... >The doorbell rang. Makoto got to answer it. It was the pizza >they had ordered an hour ago. TOM: *Tortoise Pizza*! It gets there when it gets there! > Tom: Japanese Pizza Boys have lot of places to go two. MIKE: So they have more than *one* place to go? >"What took you so long?" she asked. CROW: [pizza fellow] I forgot that the *big* pedal was the gas, and the *little* pedal was the brake. > Tom: Traffic jam that was the area of China. > Crow: That's big! > Mike: Did it come with peanut butter? > Tom: Smooth or Chunky systle? > Mike: Does it matter? > Crow: No. > Tom: We just what make a bad joke into a good one. CROW: That was a joke? TOM: Please... kill me now! MIKE: No, you're going to suffer like the rest of us. >"Iie nihongo, iie," the delivery boy said looking confused. He >noticed the tv show and grinned. TOM: [boy] Oh, for fun... you're watching a Barney clone!! JAMIE: ARGH!!! KILL BARNEY!!! TOM: I've got to watch what I say. > All: Subbittles, please. MIKE: Bittles of what? >"You speak english?" he asked slowly. > Tom: (Mokato) Hai! > Crow: What does that mean? > Tom: It's Japanese for no. CROW: Exqueeze me? MIKE: I don't mean to sound mean, but Dr. Thinker's knowledge of Japanese appears to be as extensive as his writing skills. >"Minako, come here and translate!" Makoto called. Minako >reluctantly left Andy Jones to talk to the pizza boy. TOM: What? MIKE: [Makoto] But he *is* my ex-boyfriend! > Crow: Trading one for another.... CROW: Pizza? What the hell am I talking about? >"Hello. I'm Minako." she said easily in english. Love hearts >appeared in her eyes when she saw how cute he was. TOM: Man, this is predictable. MIKE: Why can't that have happened to me? CROW: Have a beautiful, young, woman fall in love wit you at first sight? MIKE: No. Getting a pizza. I'm starved! > Mike: Girls will be girls... > Tom: Guys will be girls... > Crow: Hentai will be Hentai!!! Mike: CROW!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! MIKE: I dunno...that sounds right. >"I'm Douggy. Sorry the pizza is late but it's hard to find the >right house when the numbers are all over the place!" > Tom: Japanese housing is confusing. CROW: You should try driving in Boston! Now *that*'s confusing! >"Thats ok. Do you want to stay and have some with us?" > Mike: (Douggy) BEEP!! They need me on the set. > Crow: (Mokato) What for? > Mike: (Douggy) I'm playing a english-teenager sentai hero. TOM: Ah, cute... MIKE: Kill them. >"I can't. I've got other pizzas to deliver." >"Too bad," Minako said. CROW: [Minako] You could have had a cookie. MIKE: Crow... > Tom: Minako lost another boyfriends. > Crow: That's Minako for you. TOM: This is hell for us. >Makoto paid for the pizzas and brought them over. She had made >sure to only order one pizza that Usagi and Chibi-Usa liked so >the rest of them would get some too. CROW: One with lame cheese? > Ami was still watching the >tv show and carefully saying each word after a strange looking >man said them. Usagi and Chibi-Usa were laughing at the man's >strange expressions. Rei was no where to be seen. TOM: I know what you did last summer... > Crow: She have gone home to have sex with Chad. > Mike: CROW!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! MIKE: That sounds pretty accurate, actually. CROW: I just hope she uses protection! MIKE: CROW!!! >Usagi and Chibi-Usa jumped on their pizza CROW: Ewwwwww!!! TOM: I've heard of playing *with* your food, but playing *on* your food? > and began fighting >over who got the largest slice. Ami absently picked up a piece >and ate it while still watching the tv. MIKE: Man, Ami has really vegged out here. > Minako and Makoto >discussed the cute Andy Jones and Douggy. CROW: As opposed to the ugly Andy Jones and Douggy. > Mike: As "Doug Funnie". > Crow: You are silly, Mike. TOM: What the hell kind of riff was *that*, Nelson? >Usagi paused with a piece of pizza half way to her mouth. MIKE: Why stop there? At some times, she can fit a *whole* pizza in her mouth! > Tom: What happen here? Usagi is a pig. > Crow: That would be a good Zord for her. > Mike: She like more a rabbit Zord. >(Crow groans) CROW: Why does this seem familiar? >"Hey! I think I know how to fix the video recorder!" she >exclaimed. TOM: [Usagi] Call a repairman!! Oh, I'm sure smart!!! > Tom: Really? I think Luna say that you can't do that. > Crow: She said "Barely" > Mike: Anywhy that's Serena, but Usagi. MIKE: Well, yeah... huh? >"You?" Chibi-Usa started laughing. Usagi shook her fist at the >girl then yelled, "Moon Crisis Make Up!" CROW: Moon... Crisis... Make... Up? TOM: I need an earthquake... a death in the family... my kids to run away... the entire planet about to be destroyed!! > While she was > Mike: (Usagi) I wonder what happen if Reenie and Serena were > doing the same thing? > Crow: (Luna) I might been teasting you. MIKE: How do you *teast* something? TOM: Easy! The same way someone landing on a wooden table makes the sound "TOG!" CROW: Kiss up. >transforming the phone rang. Makoto sighed and got up to answer >it. CROW: [Makoto] Is Mike Rotch here?... Why, you little idiot!!! > Tom: (Makoto) It's was the pizza company, they forget to give us > change. > Crow: (Makoto) It is one of Power Rangers, Jadiete's in Angel > Grove. We need to help them out. > Mike: (Makoto) DIC's called... WE BACK ON TV!!!!!!!!! On the > Cartoon Network! Of course. TOM: Oh, really? MIKE: No. >"Usagi, if you're finished "changing", your mom is on the >phone!" MIKE: She wants to know if you were outside eating the dirt again! > Tom: (Usagi) Nani? How did she get Mako-chan's number? > Crow: What does Nani mean? > Tom: You should know? > Mike: (Crow) Nani does Nani mean? > Crow: Oh, what? > Mike: Yup. CROW: ARRRRRRGGHGHGHGHGHGH!!!! TOM: I CAN'T STAND THIS!! THIS IS SO INSIPID!!! MIKE: Hang in there, Tom! >Makoto yelled. Sailor Moon walked over and took the phone. >"Moshi moshi mama" she said. CROW: Purple Password Phisher. MIKE: Picked a pair of pickled peppers. > Tom: I don't know that word. > Crow: Me either. > Mike: If you know E-Mail us at author of this MSTing at > WINKSTWO@SSSNET.COM TOM: I don't know *that* phrase, but I have a few words for *YOU*... MIKE: Tom, please relax... we will get through this. CROW: How much longer IS this crap, Mike?! >Rei walked out of the bathroom to see Sailor Moon talking on the >phone, Ami sitting 2 inches away from the tv screen, CROW: That's going to hurt tomorrow! MIKE: Maybe she shouldn't sit so close to a TV named The Radiation King. TOM: Wow. Good *and* obscure. > Chibi-Usa >gorging herself on pizza and Minako and Makoto with big love >hearts in their eyes. She sighed, it was going to be a long, >typical evening. MIKE: Crow, I'm going to quote you and say "Lemon time". > She walked over to Mako-chan and whispered >something in her ear. Makoto nodded a few times in response. >Rei walked over to the kitchen to get some asprin, nearly being >deafened by Sailor Moon while she was in there. TOM: [offscreen] Hey, Rei!! Clean up these curly hairs in the bathroom!! MIKE: Tom!! > Mike: Thinking of asprin, did Frank send up a couple boxes of it? > Crow: 10 boxes each contain 200 hundred bottles. 1 open, after we > watched "Moondusted". 4 empty contain within the near trash bin. > Tom: Ewwwwwwwwwwwwwww!!! Don't remind me. > Crow: With pleasure! CROW: What? When did this happen? TOM: You have a feeling that the universe is about to collapse around us? >"Ok mama, bai bai!" Sailor Moon said and hung up the phone, "Mom >had to ring up and remind me of the english test on Monday. And >she said that you have to be in bed by 8 Chibi-Usa." MIKE: So Usagi is Chibi-usa's sister? I never knew that! CROW: You do now. TOM: FRESH... PLOT... TWISTS!!! CROW: Is Nightbaby co-writing this? > Mike: Oh, brother. TOM: You devil? Naw, doesn't work. >"Eiiiiight?" Chibi-Usa whined, "But I bet you're going to be up >'till midnite!" MIKE: [Chibi-usa] We were going to watch Jay Leno! TOM: I prefer David Letterman, myself. > Mike: (Usagi) And you are a pain in the neck. CROW: Damn tootin!! >"Yeah. But you're not as old as us," Sailor Moon stuck out her >tounge. Chibi-Usa did likewise. > All: Ewwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwww!!!!!!!!! TOM: Exactly. They're frenching each other. ALL: [shudder] >"Would you two shuttup!" Rei snapped. >"Whats up with you?" asked Sailor Moon. CROW: The sky, clouds, that airplane... >"Nothing," Rei answered shortly and drunk her asprin, "Hey >Makoto is it ok if I go and lie down on your bed for a while?" MIKE: [Makoto] Well... not if I'm in it... >[4] CROW: How do I hate this fic? Let me count the ways... > Tom: (Makoto) Touch my bed, and you might get zap moring. I use > it for target practice. TOM: Gah?? >"Sure," agreed Makoto. > Tom: How kind. Kill her. MIKE: Kill *everyone!!* CROW: A little dark, Mike? >Sailor Moon walked back over to the gathering in front of the >tv. She sat down on the sofa and saw that there was none of her >pizza left TOM: [Jon Arbuckle] Garfield!!! > Tom: (Usagi) MAGIC MOON PIZZA!!! > Crow: You get silly, Tom. > Magic: The Mads ringing in my ears! MIKE: My brain hurts! > TOM: A *theather*...slightly lighter than a *feather*! > > Tom: What up, Doc? CROW: Nothing. >(DEEP 13) > Dr. Thinker: Bugsy, Daffy and Elmur. I tell want to tell I > working on a new series called "SPACE KNIGHTS". MIKE: Like Space Mutiny, only better. > It's about a four > Princess that rule Altanis and called apon the Power of Space > Knight and the human robotic called Knightus. What do you think, > Mike? MIKE: I think you're an ass. BOTS: MIIIKE!! MIKE: Sorry. >(SOL) > Mike: The truth or a lie? TOM: How about *dare*. Dare to END THIS LITERARY DISASTER!!! (DEEP 13) > Dr. Thinker: The truth? TOM: I never did graduate High School. >(SOL) > Mike: You should be not watching any more Sailor Moon or Power > Rangers. CROW: *Especially* Power Rangers. TOM: Hey! CROW: Sorry fanboy. >(Mad's light) > Crow: Hold the phone, Mike. We get Dr. F's fan-fic on the other > line. > Mike: Huh? MIKE: Our fanfics don't come by telephone!! > Tom: WE GET THE FAN-FIC SIGN again! > TOM: Mike, are we dead? We are watching our dopples incoherently riff an even worse piece of fanfiction, which is just as painful!! CROW: All I know is had this been a Gonterman fic, I would be dead. JAMIE: I SHALL... TOM: Shut up already! JAMIE: Sorry. > Tom: What was about? > Crow: Just shameless self-promission, of his stupid series. CROW: Actually, I would have said promotion, not promission. >"CHIBI-USA!" she screamed. She looked at the girl to see her >stuff the last crust into her mouth. Chibi-Usa smiled. MIKE: You guys see anything Tweety-esque about her? > Tom: That break was to short. > Crow: Can we get back to the fan-fic? > Mike: Nay. I like to complain about Dr. Thinker for a bit. TOM: You *are* in the fanfic, idiot!! MIKE: Hey! >"How where you gonna fix the VCR?" Makoto asked quickly to avoid >the fight. CROW: Gee. I had her pegged wrong! Usually, she would *love* a fight! > Mike: Get the one of my room at my house, Makoto. TOM: Wha? MIKE: Looks like we'll be doing Rick Hunter impressions for the rest of the day. >"Oh yeah," said Sailor Moon. She stood and yelled, "Moon Healing >Escalation!" at the VCR, ignoring the looks she was getting. [3] TOM: Three?? Five should be next!! CROW: Looks like Amy can't count. > Mike: What are all zombie under the control of the Lord Money? > Crow: Huh? Mike: Money is the root of all evil. Crow: Oh. MIKE: What the hell was that about? TOM: Whoever is responsible for this... I'LL GET YOU!!!! CROW: Tom!! Hang in there!! We can't lose you now! >"Try it now," she told Makoto as her sailor fuku faded away. CROW: Leaving her completely nude! MIKE: Crow! >Makoto pressed play and Juliet's face appeared. The picture was >perfect. Usagi smiled triumphantly. CROW: Whooooo!! Now I can watch a snuff film!! > Mike: (Zordan) NEVER USE your POWER for yourself. > Crow: Good thing, the author use some who NEVER meet Zordan. > Mike: (Luna) SERENA!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Don't you > that thing for yourself. > Crow: Better. > Mike: Thanks....I think. TOM: What the hell!! The riffs make less sense than the story!! WHAT IS GOING ON HERE?!! CROW: Didn't I tell you before? The complete butchering of the English Language. >Her moment of victory was spoiled by her stomach grumbling MIKE: The agony of indigestion... > Tom: Like a volanaco, about to explodes it's top. > Crow: Or like Tom when exlodes his head. > Tom: I DO NOT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! (Tom's head exlodes) > Crow: I told you, so. > Mike: Crow!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! TOM: [livid] THAT'S IT!!! YOU'RE DEAD!! [leaps at the screen] MIKE: TOM!! Stop!! [MIKE grabs TOM and holds him] MIKE: [softly] Tom... relax... relax... CROW: Actually, Tom... your head "exloded". >loudly. Everyone laughed. Makoto offered to make some popcorn >for everyone to eat while they watched the end of the movie. >"Arigatou Mako-chan!" Usagi cried. CROW: I'm getting out of this fanfic! > Crow: You are NOT WELCOME!!!!!!! TOM: You know what, Mike? I think we're in the Twilight Zone. I think we're going to have a lot of trouble sleeping tonight! >Usagi and Chibi-Usa sat on the couch. Ami sat to the left of the >sofa on the floor, Minako leant against it in the middle, >between Usagi and Chibi-Usa's legs, CROW: [double-takes] I can't believe this!!! MIKE: Crow... > and Makoto sat on the right. >Usagi and Chibi-Usa shared a bowl of buttery popcorn while > Mike: Fat will get you everything in the world... > Crow: Expect serious. TOM: What? MIKE: That looks ass-backwards to me. >watching the movie. The other girls had theirs plain. > Mike: Plain as a old time radio show. CROW: Plain as Camilla Parker Bowles. >"Less calories and fat," Minako explaied. > Mike: As if!!! MIKE: That stuff *always* tastes bad! >"Yeah, gotta stay skinny to get a boyfriend!" Makoto said. TOM: ...and a disturbing view into the Western view of beauty. > Tom: You are skinner then Skull on Power Rangers. TOM: I couldn't agree with you more. >"I've already got my Mamo-chan," Usagi said smiling. CROW: And cue retaliatory riff... > Tom: It Wouldn't be Sailor Moon, with out a remark about Mamo- > chan. MIKE: We are predictable sometimes, aren't we, Crow? TOM: It's scary. >"Pass the popcorn Usagi, you're hogging it," demanded Chibi-Usa. > Tom: CAT-FIGHT!! CAT-FIGHT!!! CAT-FIGHT!!!!!!! CROW: No... DITZ-FIGHT! DITZ-FIGHT! DITZ-FIGHT!! >Am not!" >"Are too!" Chibi-Usa made a grab for the popcorn but her hands >were slipperly because of the butter on them. The bowl slipped >out of her grasp and overturned, all over Minako's head! ALL: WAHH... WAHHH... WAAAAAAHHH!! > ALL: (Kimbery Heart) GROSS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! ALL: Huh? >"Arggghhh!" > ALL: NO KIDDING!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! MIKE: This makes no sense!! >"Gomen nasai Minako-chan!" Chibi-Usa apoligised. TOM: Gesundheit. > Tom: To late for that, his story is VERY sorry...and boring. > Crow: Let's portal out of his Nega-Base. > Dr. Thinker: (voice) Not this time, Nega-Nuts. > Crow: Fugde!!! ALL: SPOOOOOOONNN! MIKE: TOGGGG!! CROW: ZOWIE!! TOM: PACK!!! >"Waaaahhhh, there goes all my popcorn. I'm gonna die of >starvation!" Usagi wailed. Chibi-Usa helped Minako pick the CROW: Nosehairs? > Mike: We going to die of bored. MIKE: Amen to that. >popcorn out of her hair. Minako sniffed her hair dubiosly. It TOM: [stoner] ...gave her a really rad buzz!! > Tom: attack her with no reason. MIKE: First, it was attack of the Killer Tomatoes. Now, it's attack of the Killer Popcorn! >smelt like butter. > Mike: With skunk hair. CROW: [Mr. Granger] And piggy eyes. >"Mako-chan, is it ok if I wash my hair?" she asked. > Crow: I like to butter you will up! > Mike: Crow!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! MIKE: I would say that if I knew what the hell you said. >"Sure, there's some towels in the cupboard." > Tom: But they have holes in them. TOM: I wonder why? CROW: [Makoto] Usagi, have you been inhaling Drano and sneezing on the towels? >"Arigatou." Minako departed for the bathroom. MIKE: [Minako] Man, Rei!! Everyone keep the spicy food away from her! > Tom: Or the litte girl room. > Mike: Tom!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! TOM: What? What was so bad about that?! MIKE: I don't know. >Minako towel dried her hair after washing it throughly to get >rid of the butter. MIKE: In this case, butter *isn't* better. TOM: Parkay. > Tom: It was really yellow peanut better. > Crow: That get NEW MEANING to sticking hair. >(Mike groans) CROW: *This* gives a new meaning to torture. >It was going to take ages to dry. She remebered a >similar incident, a few years ago, in a salon. If worked for >Usagi... Minako raised her hand and said, "Venus Crystal Power >Make Up!" A orange haze surounded her. TOM: [Minako] Tang, take me away!!! > When it cleared she was >Sailor Venus. She looked in the mirror, her hair looked great. >She felt it, it was completely dry. Smiling, she detransformed. >Minako walked back out into the lounge. She made sure she sat on >the floor far away from clutzy girls with popcorn. MIKE: [Minako] Man!! That means I have to separate from my body again! Oh, well. > Tom: Smart idea. >When the movie ended, 4 girls were crying and 1 again shouted >"Banzai!" >"Can we watch something decent now?" >"That was so sad!" >"They both died!" CROW: This *fic* died. > Mike: (Amy Brigder) Confuse ATTACK NOW!!!!!!!!!!!! > Crow & Tom: No kidding!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! TOM: You confused *ALL* of us!! >"All they wanted was each other." > Mike: Kind of like Serenity and Emdyion. MIKE: Or Wilykat and Captain Bragg. CROW: Or A-ko and B-ko. TOM: Now that was just plain bad. >"Wasn't Romeo handsome?" > Tom: As handsome as bullfrog. > Crow: What if they would watching Leonardo DicCaprio's film. > Tom: That's "Titanic", CROWZILLA!!!! > Crow: He started in others, TOMAN!!!!! > Mike: Cut it out, guys! TOM: Mike!! This fic is draining my will to live!! It and the riffing combined... it's too much!! CROW: Tom, we can pretend it is a bad dream, I guess... >"It was certaintly an interesting adaption of the orginal play >by William Shakespeare. Keeping all the original dialouge >combined with modern imagery sure resulted in a unique movie." MIKE: Macbeth? > Crow: It's is Leonardo DicCaprio's second film. > Tom: Then it moves up to nice duck. > Mike: At least it not an ugly duckly. >(Tom & Crow groans) TOM: Who, Leonardo DiCappuchino? CROW: [DiCaprio] That's *DiCaprio*! >"AMI-CHAN!" >"What are we going to do now?" asked Minako. ALL: SLEEP!!! CROW: ORGY!!! MIKE: Stop that. TOM: He hasn't been the same since Dirty Moon. >"I've got some more videos, mostly action. I think there's an >anime fest on all night." said Makoto. Chibi-Usa yawned. Usagi >noticed the time was 8:15. MIKE: If you've been reading this fic... you'd be dead by now. > Tom: The total of the time is the IQ of the author. TOM: Author(s). Combined. >"It's bedtime for you Chibi-Usa!" she announced. >"Can't I stay up just a little longer?" >"It's already 15 minutes past 8!" >"Where am I sleeping? I don't want to sleep on the floor!" CROW: [falsetto] Well, you can sleep on me, honey! MIKE: Crow, I'm warning you... don't go there... >"Rei's asleep on the bed," said Minako. >"How about I make a bed for you on the sofa Chibi-Usa?" asked >Makoto, then added with a wink, "Then you can stay where all the >action is and technically be in bed.' TOM: [Makoto] IfyaknowwhatImean!! CROW: Stop stealing my lines! >"Arigatou Mako-chan!" > Tom: This is making be sleeping.... > Crow: Me, two..... > Mike: Me, three..... ALL: Yeah, we hear you. >"Maybe we should get ready for bed too," suggested Usagi. >"Yeah, it's getting chilly," agreed Minako, thinking of >snuggling up in her warm sleeping bag. CROW: *With* Usagi? Lemon time! TOM: You may be right, Crow. > Minako, Ami, Usagi and >Chibi-Usa went for their bags. MIKE: This is the literary equivalent of a sedative. > Gypsp: Enter? > Magic Voice: Guys are sleep. > Gypsp: I MST until them up. Keep a eye on the controls. > Magic Voice: Ok! CROW: Whaaatt? All Gypsy would do is moo 'Richard Basehart'!! GYPSY: I heard that! MIKE: Looks like *someone's* rooms isn't going be to cleaned up! >"I forgot my pjs!" wailed Usagi as she searched through her bag, >spreading clothes all over the room. TOM: [Usagi] Guess I'll have to stay nude. CROW: BOOINNGGG!!! MIKE: Crow... > Gypsp: She's like Tommy Oliver. TOM: [Eva Gabor] Oliver!! MIKE: More space. >"You could borrow a pair of mine, but I think they might be a > bit too big for you," offered Makoto. > Gypsp: Makoto is the tall of all the Sailor Scouts. CROW: So? TOM: Can someone please refresh my memory as to what the plot is of this fic? MIKE: Uhhhh... a sleepover at Makoto's? I don't know. CROW: Well, that's what's happening now. So I guess that's our plot! > ----------------------------------------------------------- >(Author Note: According to some authors, Gypsp is the one who get > Tom hook on Power Rangers and Crow on Sailor Moon. Now back to > the MSTing) > ----------------------------------------------------------------- TOM: Ehhhhh? MIKE: I'm really lost now. CROW: I think that was a break in the riffing. TOM: Too bad it didn't last longer. >"Thanks but I got a better idea," Usagi held aloft the Luna Pen >(?). CROW: Yeah. WHY? > Gypsp: When this Japanese is the MOON PEN. What are you, a stupid > author? TOM: My head hurts!! MIKE: Stupid authors for stupid fics... >"Moon Power, make me ready for bed," she yelled. A pair of >pyjamas apeared on her and her hair became unfastened, flowing >down her back until it nearly reached the floor. MIKE: Leaving her completely bald! CROW: What happened to her clothes? > Gypsp: Fast change. TOM: I'll say. >"If Luna was here she'd kill you," said Ami, "You know she says >you should only use that for Sailor business." >"Well lucky for me she isn't!" MIKE: [Luna] Aha!! Into the spanking machine with you! > Gypsp: Or else, he will craw you to death...OH!! NOW!! I beening > spending two mean times with Tom in Holobranca. > Magic Voice: It could be worse? > Gypsp: What? CROW: [Magic Voice] We could be listening to Barry Manilow records. > Magic Voice: You could have make a "Crow Joke"!! > Gypsp: What joke? > Magic Voice: Like this. (Crow) We need some more sex. (Mike) > Crow!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! > Gypsp: Oh. TOM: That's a pretty lame joke... even for Crow. CROW: Yeah... hey. >Makoto disapeared into her bedroom to change. Minako pulled out >of her bag a pretty nighty, which was covered in red love >hearts, MIKE: Do we really need to see this? CROW: I want to! > Gypsp: Again that look soo lovely with out the butter stains? >(Crow awake) TOM: Butter... stains? CROW: FOOD FETISH!! MIKE: If they do something wit chocolate, I'll puke. >and proceeded to change into it. Ami blushed as Minako pulled >off her top. CROW: [drooling] MIKE: CROW!!! CROW: What? I'm not saying anything. TOM: But you're making a mess on the floor! > Ami quickly busied herself looking for her >sleepware in her bag. She found her nighty and pulled it on over >her head, turning her back to the others. Then took her shirt >and bra off under the cover of her nighty and finished by >removing her skirt. TOM: Oh, boy... Crow's really gone. CROW: Gaaahhhhh... >(Crow's awake, but Gypsp's does know that) > Gypsp: Crow have love that part if he stay awake? CROW: I *am* awake!! > Crow: Oh, babe!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! >(Mike and Tom is awake) > Mike & Tom : CROW!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! MIKE: Never mind. >(Gypsp leaves) >Chibi-Usa struggled to remove her top. Usagi noticed. >"Need some help?" she asked. TOM: NOOOOOO!! Not with Chibi-usa!! CROW: AAAARRRRGGHHH!! Let her do it by herself!! >"No," Chibi-Usa said. Usagi grabbed the bottom of her top anyway >and lifted it off her. ALL: ARARRGGGHGHGHGH!!! >"I said I didn't need any help!" >"It would have taken you all night otherwise." > Mike: This fan-fic takes all night to riff. MIKE: Yeah, I'm sure right there. >Makoto walked out of her bedroom wearing green and white >checkered pyjamas. CROW: Colour clash alert... TOM: [Makoto] I don't know why... but I feel like I should be in a Holiday Inn. > She carried a pillow, sheets and a blanket > Mike: You can play chess on it. TOM: Hey, Mike... your dopple's a little late on the trigger with his riff! MIKE: He needs JOLT! CROW: Kiss up. >for Chibi-Usa's bed. She quickly made up the bed. Chibi-Usa >hopped in. >"Oyasumi nasai minna," she said, rolled over and fell asleep. MIKE: [Chibi-usa] Shouldn't have had the pork roast... ohhh... TOM: I guess they shouldn't have had C-ko pop the popcorn. >"At last, we're free of her!" grinned Usagi. She, Ami and Minako >spread out their sleeping bags on the floor. CROW: *EXTREME* *SLEEPING* *BAG* *ARRANGING* *ACTION*!!! The girls unzipped >their sleeping bags and wrapped them around themselves so they >could be warm and stay sitting up. TOM: Oh, this should be interesting. They're going to watch porn. > Makoto went and got herself a >pillow and some blankets. > Tom: From the trash can. MIKE: Actually, she got those *pajamas* from the trash can. TOM: Trash can at the Holiday Inn? >"So are we going to watch the anime fest?" asked Makoto. Getting >no response she added, "They're screening the first 2 Sailor V >movies back to back right now!" CROW: And... we've broken the fourth wall. MIKE: Actually, in the Sailor Moon universe, it *was* shown that they had made a Sailor V movie and were working on a sequel. TOM: And here I thought Crow was the fanboy. >"Lets watch it!" said Minako and Usagi. Ami shrugged. >"Ok Sailor V it is," Makoto switched channels until she found >it. TOM: [Makoto] Sailor V... In Color. > Tom: Japanes only have a couple of channels. Why in his fan- > fiction do have so many? > Crow: Beat me! CROW: Don't mind if I do! MIKE: Uh... no. > Tom & Mike: Know they're a thought. MIKE: Did he even *mention* channels? >The movies were short, the first went for 1 hour and the second >for 1 and a half. The first story had Sailor V on the trail of >international jewel thieves who had stolen the world's largest >diamond from a museum in London. CROW: Why does this remind me of Chesty Morgan? MIKE: Uhh, Crow? TOM: Sounds like a plot from a Scooby Doo episode. > The second movie was about a >group of terrorists who threatened to blow up all of Tokyo if >their demands of 1 trillion yen were not met. TOM: Wow!! That's a lotta yen! > Mike: WOW!! Why can I get those movies. > Crow: Why don't we try to contain Sailor Venus >(All think about for a mintue) > All: Nah!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! CROW: Contain Sailor Venus? How about contain this *fanfic*? MIKE: And seal it in the middle of the earth. >Minako and Usagi paid rapt attention to the movies, often >yelling and cheering Sailor V on. They were so loud it was >amazing that > Tom: The didn't blow up the building. TOM: [John McLaughlin] WRONG! MIKE: The answer is... >they didn't wake Chibi-Usa. Makoto watched but without the >intense focuse that the two blonde girls had. Ami paid little >attention to the movie. Her attention was focused on the book in >her lap. CROW: ... oh, this is Ami we're talking about. > Mike: It's the "Man in the Iron Mask". TOM: "The Girl with the blow-up Doll". MIKE: TOM!! >"Wow! I love Sailor V!" >"They did the voice all wrong! I do not sound like that!" CROW: [Minako] I'm sure glad I have a space-time shield! > Mike: You don't. So in the movie, they don't have Minako doing > that job. > Crow: Correct. MIKE: Huh? >"The first movie was best, more action in it." > Mike: Jutiper, I will bet. TOM: No, Jupiter. CROW: You know, maybe Dr. Thinker *isn't* getting more coherent. >"But the second contained a better storyline with more twists >and turns." > Crow: Minako prefers in becomes it have sex in it. > Mike: Crow!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! MIKE: Crow, what the hell did you just say? CROW: I don't know. >The next anime movie was Patlabor, which no one really wanted to >watch. TOM: *Patlabor*?! MIKE: That brings to mind *two* horrible images. > Tom: To hentai for anyone taste. > Mike: Tom!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! CROW: LAAAAMMMMEEE!!! >"Lets play Truth or Dare!" Minako suggested. TOM: Here's your lemon setup, Crow! > Tom: What about Twenty Question. > Crow: They can't. Or esle the author have to think somefrom > Japan. MIKE: True... although she is coming up with plenty of Japanese words... >"Ok," everyone agreed. Minako looked around for a victim to ask. >She spotted Ami with her nose buried in a book. CROW: Playboy's Hot Coeds? MIKE: [sigh] > Tom: The book is "2,000 World Tales!" > Crow: It is a text-book. TOM: Advanced Anal-Retentiveness 325. MIKE: How to get out of bad fanfics... >"Ami-chan! Truth or dare?" >"Truth," Ami looked up from her book and responded. >"Who's the cutest boy at school?" Minako knew exactly the right >question to ask to make Ami blush. CROW: Oh, Mamoru? > Mike: (Amy) Greg. ALL: Who?!! >"Can I take dare instead?" >"No, but I'll let ya. I dare you to not look at a book all >night!" >"Ok," Ami said sighing and put her book away. TOM: [Ami] Looks like I'll have to wait until tomorrow to get my learn on!! >"Now you have to ask someone," Minako prompted. > Mike: I pick Tom. > Tom: What? > Mike: Truth or Dare. TOM: ...the hell? MIKE: I'm not playing *that*. > Tom: Truth. > Mike: Do or don't you like this fan-fic? > Tom: I hate it! > Mike: Works for me. CROW: Me too. >"Hmmm, Mako-chan, truth or dare?" >"Ummm... Dare!" TOM: [Ami] I dare you not to mention an old boyfriend. >"I dare you to... ummmm..errr.." Ami stammered for a few >minutes. > Tom: (Garfield) That goes that motorboat again. He will need to > get a oil. MIKE: That would have been a good riff... had we known what that last sentence fragment was. >Minako took pity on her, and whispered something in her ear. >"I dare you to wear your hair in a new style for the evening." >"Any particular style?" CROW: Wear dreadlocks. TOM: MC Mizuno. > Mike: bald as that weird head. > Crow: EEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWW!!!! MIKE: Sinead O'Connor? ALL: [shudder] >"Odangos!" Minako said. >"But thats my hairdo!" cried Usagi. >"It's only for the night Usagi," Minako said, "And it was a dare >so she has to do it." >"I'll fetch my brush and a mirror," Makoto said. CROW: And some hydrochloric acid. TOM: Aren't we dark today, Crow? CROW: What? > Mike: Ewwwww!!! I feel butter on them. MIKE: That joke's deader than Princess Di. BOTS: MIIIKKKEE! >Makoto pulled her hair tie out and brushed her hair out. > Mike: Like it was on fire. CROW: Ha. Ha. A brush fire. Funny. >Everyone was surprised by how long it, it reached all the way >down to her hips. She seperated her hair into two TOM: Man!! Those are some sharp fingers! and tried to > Mike: The only one with short hair is Amy. > Crow: Inner or including Outers? > Mike: Inner only. > Crow: Then you are right. MIKE: Inners? Outers? Are we talking about hair or belly buttons? CROW: I know! He he... >wrap one lot into an odango. It didn't work. After a few more >unsuccessful tries she turned to Usagi and asked, "How do you do >it? It's impossible!" CROW: [Makoto] Well, without *cutting* it. > Tom: (Amy) Pick another style? >"I'll show you," Usagi took the brush and a hair tie and within > Crow: (Zoyitice) I show mine, know show me yours. > Mike: Crow!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! MIKE: Zoyicite?!! Where the hell did that come from??! TOM: Left field, like everything else. >30 seconds had one odango done. >"Now you do the other one." Makoto tried again and eventually >got something that faintly resembled CROW: A muttonchop. > Tom: A ponytail that was on fire. > TOM: Um... no. MIKE: Who's riffing this? Dr. Thinker or Beavis? > an odango. > Mike: As if. MIKE: More space. TOM: Mike, stop, please. >"Good enough?" she asked Ami. >"Yes," she replied. CROW: [Ami] I think you should keep your day job. > Tom: Not for me. >"Usagi-chan, truth or dare?" asked Makoto. > Mike: Dare. I dare you to shut up! BOTS: Yeah!! Way to tell 'em, Mike! >"Truth," answered Usagi. > Crow: (Makoto) Are you having sex with Mamo-chan? > Mike: Crow!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! TOM: Silly girl, we all know that answer is YES. >"Will you miss Chibi-Usa when she returns home?" >"Miss that brat? Not a chance!" MIKE: [Usagi] Well, for the purposes of the story... > Tom: I will bet a dollar, that she's change her mind. > Crow: Ok! CROW: But we have no money. TOM: Shhhhh... >Usagi yelled at once, then MIKE: Once yelled back at her twice. > Tom: Kick Makoto in the shins. > Crow: You getting dark, Tom. > Tom: No kidding? > Crow: I have kid, kid. MIKE: CROW!!! TOM: ...the hell? CROW: What are you talking about? > Tom: Hey! > Mike: (takes a toy Moon wand and circle it's above they're head) > Tom & Crow: We will be good. > Mike: (places the toy Moon wand on this lap) TOM: Boy, Mike... you've been studying Freud, eh? MIKE: Tom... >paused, "Maybe just a little. She's alright sometimes, like now >when she's asleep." Usagi pulled Chibi-Usa's blanket up and over >her. Usagi looked at her sleeping daughter for a few seconds >before turning back to the game. CROW: [Usagi] So... I easily won a bet because of you. Thanks. > Tom: Of stupids and chickens. By the way, Crow, you own me, a > dollar. CROW: In your dreams, Servo! TOM: Crow... you don't REALLY owe me a dollar! >"Minako-chan, truth or dare?" >"Dare" >"I dare you to act out a scene from one of the Sailor V movies >we just saw!" MIKE: [sarcastic] Oh, THIS should be fun. CROW: Okay... I'm lost... what the hell is this thing leading up to anyway? TOM: The sex scene? > Tom: That's too SILLY. > Crow: Or too STUPID.. > Mike: How stupid silly. > Crow & Tom: Works for us. TOM: What is happening here? CROW: If you didn't listen to me the last two times, I won't repeat myself. MIKE: I won't say it. >"Do I get to pick the scene or do you?" > Tom: Pick the theme song!!! > Crow: It's might be bad music with out any words. CROW: Like Kenny G? >"You can." >"Ok I pick the scene where she get to kiss the handsome guy." >"Uhh.. we seem to have a shortage of handsome guys, >Minako-chan," pointed out Ami. TOM: [Ami] But Makoto is more butch than I am!! > Crow: Or then the kiss the butt of Amy! > Mike: Crow!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! CROW: Silly me... I meant the--- MIKE: NO, Crow. >"Well unless one of you guys want to fill in, I guess I'll have >to choose another scene then." After thinking for a moment >Minako said, CROW: [Minako] My brain hurts!! > "I want to do the scene where Sailor V catches the > jewel theives. Who wants to be the jewel theieves?" MIKE: [Rei] I do! Then I can get out of this business! > Tom: They stolen female hip bones. > Mike: Tom!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! TOM: Huh? >"I get to watch because I dared you," said Usagi quickly. >"Ok then, Ami-chan and Mako-chan you start running when I say go >and I'll catch you, ok?" asked Minako. They both nodded. CROW: And cue suggested lesbian horseplay... >"V Power (?)" Minako yelled and became Sailor V in a orange (?) >flash. >"You didn't want me to do in the wrong outfit, did you?" she >asked grinning. MIKE: [Venus] Continuity? What continuity? TOM: Continuity? We don't need no stinking continuity! > Mike: Like a Luarian cat will all know and love. TOM: Would that be a *Cheshire Cat*? >"Go!" Sailor V yelled. Ami and Makoto started running away from >her. In the movie Sailor V had used an attack on the jewel >theives which stunned them. Sailor V improvised and picked up a >couple of pillows. She threw them at Ami and Makoto, causing >them to fall to the ground. CROW: Gasp!! That's stronger than Ami's soap bubbles!! They're doomed now!! > Tom: Like a ton of brick. > Crow: She must have eat lots pizza and pop-corn. > Mike: They lost both of them. > Tom: Oh. MIKE: These dopples of ours are getting pretty annoying. TOM: Shall we smite them? >Makoto grabbed one of the pillows and threw it back. CROW: PILLOW FIGHT!!!! > Mike: Like a ray of the Sun. TOM: WHAAAT? >"Pillow Fight!" yelled Usagi and joined in by throwng her pillow >at Makoto, who saw it coming and ducked. Ami hid behind the >couch until Minako came looking for her and started hitting her >with a pillow. MIKE: It's only a matter of time now... > Tom: Full with a horse and 4 horseshoes. > Crow: (Amy) Ouch!!!!! CROW: Hey, that was a good riff... sorta. >"Truce!" yelled Ami quickly. Minako stopped long enough for Ami >to crawl back around and grab a pillow. Minako popped up from >behind the couch to see what was going on and was hit in the >face with a pillow. She threw two back at the direction it came >from and quickly ducked back down. TOM: *POWERFUL* *PILLOW* *FIGHTING* *ACTION*!! > Mike: Into the large tub of butterly pop-corn. CROW: What is it with you and the popcorn, Mike? MIKE: I dunno. TOM: I'm feeling hungry for some reason. >She crawled back around to the front of the couch. Usagi >prepared to launch a pillow but just as >she was about to throw it, she was hit! Her aim was way off and >the pillow landed on top of Chibi-Usa. The girls paused, but >Chibi-Usa kept on sleeping peacefully. CROW: There's a plot device for ya! > Mike: She can sleep thought 5 torando. TOM: I think those 'sleep thoughts' are called *dreams*, champ. >"She's certaintly inherited Usagi's sound sleeping habits," said >Ami, who got hit in the face with a pillow for her comment. MIKE: Why? It's true. > Tom: Brains Cells are author is about 10% left. ALL: HUH? CROW: Well, one of the authors is down to 10% brainpower, that's for sure! >The pillow fight continued until everyone was too exhausted to >stand. Usagi yawned loudly. >ALL: (YAWMS loudly) CROW: [yawns] This yawning really is contagious. MIKE: You can say that again. >"How about we go to sleep now?" she suggested. >"You can Usagi," said Minako, "We all know you need your sleep." >"Arigatou Minako-chan," Usagi zipped up her sleeping bag and >crawled into it, "Oyasumi nasai minna." But the time she >finished saying goodnite she was asleep. TOM: Thank God... that kid eats like a horse. > Tom: Like daughter, like mother. >"I think I'll go to bed too," said Ami, "Since I'm not allowed >to read anything," she looked pointedly at Minako. MIKE: Come on... there had better be something happening... I didn't come all this way to see a slumber party. CROW: Why, Mike... I... MIKE: I don't care. I hate wasting my time. > Tom: Those goes Amy's brain!!! > Crow: Who will go to bed next? > Tom: Beat me? > Mike: Don't mind if I do. (Tom hides out is seat) TOM: [ala Orion from Dimisional Trouble] Bad Joke! >"I didn't say you couldn't read anything! Just not books," >Minako corrected, "If you're that desperate to read something, >I'm sure that Mako-chan has some manga or magazines." CROW: Or you could always read George Bush's lips. > Mike: Or scripits to bad shows to riff. MIKE: Like this one. >"Thanks but early to bed, early to rise, and the sooner I rise >the sooner I can read again!" explained Ami as she got into her >sleeping bag. CROW: [Ami] Hey!! Who whipped creamed my bag? > Crow: The last time, she have sex was back in the Sliver Millieum > with Zoyitice. > Mike: Crow!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! TOM: What the hell is the deal with Zoyicite?!! CROW: It's not Zoyicite. It's her twisted clone: Zoyitice. TOM: Oh. >"Goodnight Mako-chan, goodnite Minako-chan," she said sleepily. >"Now we can get down to the important discussions," Minako said. >"Hmmm?" >"Like who's cuter, Douggy or Andy!" >"Douggy's hair was just like my old boyfriend's, but much nicer. >And it's blonde." CROW: What SM fic wouldn't be complete without Makoto's incessant groveling over her old boyfriends? MIKE: That's boy *friend*, as in singular. > Tom: Makoto is nut > Mike: And Minako is nut, two. > Crow: Makoto and Minako are two nuts. MIKE: [singing] Sometimes you feel like a nut... >Andy had a much better hair cut." Minako and Makoto talked about >the two boys for ages, though never coming to a firm decision on >who was cuter. Minako preferred Andy while Makoto went for >Douggy. TOM: What the hell is the point here?!! > Mike: As painfull as trip to visit, Dr. Thinker. CROW: This guy bugs me!! >Makoto looked over at Minako TOM: Saaay!! MIKE: NO! > after she hadn't said anyhting >about Andy for 30 seconds. She was fast asleep, still in her >Sailor V fuku. Crow: Sailor Moon Japanese PJ. Mike: Shameless DIC idea. MIKE: If you ask me, this whole *fic* is DICked. BOTS: MIIIKE!! TOM: I think we're losing him! CROW: He has joined the Dark side. >"Mmmmmm Andy how'd you get here?" she murmered. Makoto still >wasn't tired so she got up and switched the lights off so the >others could sleep peacefully. She sat down in front of the tv, >turned the sound down low, and searched for something good to >watch. CROW: [Makoto] All night Chippendales... yes! > Mike: News about the lastest Nega-Verse attack! Film at 8:00. TOM: Wrong!! It's Film at 11!! Get the riff right!! *sob* MIKE: When good riffs go bad... >Usagi was dreaming about Romeo and Juliet. She was at a party, >wearing a Juliet's cute little winged outfit. Couples danced MIKE: Then the sniper picked off each couple from the balcony, till the floor was covered in blood. CROW: Yeesh, that's dark!! MIKE: This fic is getting to me. TOM: Naw! You don't say! > Tom: with swords in they're hand. TOM: No, no, NO!!! CROW: Settle down, Tom! >around her. She looked through them, searching for someone. She >spotted him, her Romeo, on the far side of the hall. Mamoru >wearing the armor Romeo had worn in the movie. They danced >together. MIKE: We know what's going to happen later, don't we? > Mike: I don't think he will fight in it. >"Mamo-chan," she said happily as they danced. > Crow: Around the whine cellar. TOM: Yeah, fitting, it being Usagi and all... >Minako dreamt about Andy Jones. He appeared in the middle of the >room. > Tom: Of her bedroom. CROW: If that ain't a lemon scene, I don't know what is! >"Hello Minako," he said when he saw her. >"How do you know my name, Adam?" she asked, she had no idea why >she called him Adam but it seemed to fit him. MIKE: Adam?!! This is crazy!! > Tom: I think I know what "Power Ranger" eposide they watched. > Crow: What? > Mike: "Goldar's Vice-Versa?" > Tom: Yep! TOM: Then, we have these idiots. >"I've seen you, in my dreams," he replied. > Tom: As if!!! CROW: That's about the 30 000th time your dopple's said that, Tom. >"How did you get here, Andy?" >"My secret," he smiled at her, "Give me your hand, Minako." She >held his hand and the scene shifted to a tropical island. MIKE: [stoner] Man... this is like really freaky, man!! > Mike: With Nega-Verse nut on it. >"It's so beautiful." >"Like you," Andy said and kissed her. ALL: AWWWWWW!!! > Mike: With trash all over. > >"Sport... etchi... CROW: Etchi-sketch? > sport... ads... home shopping... tentacles... >sport... news... commercials... Isn't there anything decent on?" TOM: Why is Japanese TV like American cable? > Tom: At Midnight, no way, Makoto. >Makoto complained. An exhaustive search of the tv channels had >failed to turn up anything good. CROW: [yawn] Is this thing in realtime? MIKE: Much like A-ko: The College Years. > Tom: But she miss the SCI-FI channel. > Crow: Get real. MIKE: Shameless plug # Infinity. >'Maybe I should go to bed too,' she thought as she looked back >at her sleeping friends. Ami was tossing and turning. Usagi and >Minako were making kissy noises as they slept. TOM: Together? CROW: I wish. MIKE: Crow... >'Perhaps I'll dream of Douggy," Makoto thought. > Tom: Or Jason, or Tommy, or Adam. TOM: Ick. CROW: I'll dream about Kimberly! MIKE: Crow... >"Noo! Noo! Stop it! ARGGGHHH!" Ami was yelling and screaming. > Crow: For no reason at all. MIKE: Now there's a good riff! >Makoto quickly went to her side and shook her to wake her up. >"Wake up, Ami-chan. It's ok. C'mon, wake up," said Makoto. CROW: [Makoto] Now you know not to drink a whole bottle of Jack Daniels'! MIKE : Or JOLT!!! > Tom: She was dead on the floor. TOM: Yeah, really. >"Nan... nani yo?," Ami said as she awoke. >"It's ok Ami-chan, it's me, Mako-chan. You're were having a >nightmare." MIKE: John Agar reciting the Constitution. >"Nani? Mako-chan, what are doing here?" >"It's my apartment. Remember, it's the slumber party at my >house?" CROW: [Ami] Oh, the ultra-boring lamefest I went to last night. >"Right, the sleepover," Ami sat up slowly, rubbing her eyes and >looking around the room. She was surprised that her eyes were >wet with tears. TOM: Oh, no... > Tom: Of unknown nutballs. CROW: What's a *nutball*? >"Hey, you wanna talk about it?" >"It was horrible. I was dreaming about the last fight against >Galaxia and about... dying," Ami shuddered. MIKE: Nice to see that the plot's branching out. > Mike: Amy is a chicken. > Tom: Insult her again, and turn you into a roast humans. TOM: Huh? Now I'm out-of-character! What gives?! >"It's ok, it's all over now." >"But is it really? How do we know that some new menace won't >come and we'll have to fight again?" CROW: [Makoto] We'll have better writers next time. > Tom: As if. >"We don't. But if one does, we'll win." >"That's not it Mako-chan. I don't want to fight," Ami began to >sob, "I don't like killing and fighting and violence. I want to >be a doctor, to heal people." MIKE: [Ami] It's hot and it hurts and stuff! >"You will be Ami. You're smart enough to do anything," >encouraged Makoto. She hugged her friend tight, letting her cry. TOM: Okay... and... > Mike: Like Chiba-Usa. > Tom: You were warned!! >(Tom head knocks Mike over Crow) > Crow: Get off of me, Mike!!!!! > Mike: As soon as Tom backs off! >(Tom returns to his seat. Mike refix his body) CROW: What was all *that* about?! >After a while Ami's crying ceased and Makoto resalised she was >asleep. MIKE: Resalised? TOM: I just don't know. > Tom: After this, I can sleep for a week. >'What is it with people falling asleep on me tonite?' Makoto >wondered. CROW: They like your chubby thighs? > Mike: Your are boring girl. MIKE: This *fic* is boring. TOM: This fic is *dragging*. CROW: This fic is *torture*. >"Poor Ami. It hasn't been easy on you, has it?" she murmered as >she lay her friend down. When she tried to pull away, Ami made >small, unhappy noises and tightened her grip. CROW: [Ami] Ma-ma!! > Sighing, for the >thoundsandth time that evening, she reached for a blanket with >her free hand and covered herself and Ami. MIKE: This is the *thousandth* paragraph. CROW: Feels like it. > Tom: They look a snug as a bug in rug with a hole. TOM: GYAH? HUH? >The sight which greeted Rei in the morning was enough to send >her back to bed, or convince her she was hallucinating. Sailor V >lay drooling > Crow: dreaming have sex with someone. > Mike: Crow!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! CROW: That would have been funny, had it... MIKE & TOM: We know, Crow. >in her sleeping bag. Ami and Makoto were sleeping in >each other's arms. Makoto had one odango on one side of her head >and a lump of hair on the other side. Chibi-Usa was half on, >half off the couch and would any minute now fall onto Usagi who >was sleeping next to the couch. TOM: Okaaaayy... > Usagi was scrunching up her face >and making kissy sounds. She was also wearing Rei's favourite >pjyamas. > Tom: She stolen Rei's pjymaas!!! (Tom's head exlpodes) CROW: Well, if anything would explode at this sight, it would be Mike. MIKE: CROW!! >"This is too weird, I'm going back to bed," Rei said and walked >back toward the bedroom. Before she could reach the door Usagi >screamed very loudly. Chibi-Usa had fallen on top of her. Rei >sighed and headed back into the lounge, she wasn't going to get >any sleep now that motormouth was awake. TOM: VRRRRROOOOMMM!! > Mike: The Motor-Boat is back at full speed....ahead. > Crow: Watch Out for Waterfalls... > Tom: And Icebergs. CROW: What is this? Titanic? >"AIEEEEEEEEE! Nani yo? Chibi-Usa! What are you doing? I was >having the best dream about Mamo-chan. He was giving me lots and >lots of expensive chocolates," Usagi eyelids half closed and she >nearly fell back asleep. MIKE: [Usagi] I'm such a little piggy!! > Tom: (Rei) WHAT HECK HAPPEN OUT HERE? TOM: You're in a bad story!! >"You should get up now anyway lazy bones!" Rei joined in, "And >what are you doing wearing my best pair of pjyamas?" > Mike: (Usagi) Beat me? CROW: Yes, we will. And quite hard, too. >"Huh? You have a pair like this too, Rei-chan?" Usagi was still >half sleep. > Tom: Like a fish in the ocean. MIKE: What? >"Like it? They're EXACTLY the same!" Rei fumed. TOM: No smoking in the Theatre!! > Tom: She have the voice to wake up the dead. MIKE: The Crypt Keeper? >"I forgot my pjs and..." Usagi's brain began to wake up. She >grinned at Rei, and faded back to the clothes she had been >wearing last night. She poked out her tounge. CROW: Frenching again... > All: EEEEEEEEEEEWWWWWWWW!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! >Ami slowly woke up, disturbed by the loud yelling and screaming. CROW: [Ami] You guys had an orgy and didn't invite me? MIKE: Stop that, Crow. > Tom: She punchs Makoto in her eyes. TOM: [announcer] Makoto is down... the new heavyweight champion... Ami Mizuno! >She could feel someone's arms around her. She quickly opened her >eyes and saw 2 inches from her Makoto's face. Ami blushed and CROW: Yesss? > Tom: And kick Makoto for being in her face. > Mike: Out for blood? > Tom: Yep. MIKE: This Tom seems so much like a school yard bully for some reason. >quickly pulled away. Makoto yawned and sleepily opened her eyes. >"Ohayo Ami-chan." >"Go... gomen nasai Mako-chan." >"What for?" >"Last night." TOM: [Ami] I didn't mean to T.P. you... it happened! >"Never apoligise for needing your friends Ami-chan," Makoto >smiled, "We're always here for you." >"A... arigatou Mako-chan." CROW: [Ami] Maybe we could do this more often! > Tom: That TOO SILLY for WORDS. > Crow: Don't you mean TOO STUPID. > Mike: Both will work for me. >(Tom & Crow groans) MIKE: Funny, I've never been a *punny* person. TOM: Exactly. Like this time. MIKE: [sigh] >"Whats for breakfast? I'm starving!" asked Usagi. TOM: How does she eat all that and stay whisper thin? CROW: Anime Girl Anti-Metabolism? I don't know. > Tom: I bet that she can beat Bulk and Garfield in a eating match. > Mike: You WILL win. CROW: Hell, she could probably beat Shaggy and Scooby. >"You're always hungry Usagi!" shot back Rei. >"But Chibi-Usa ate all the pizza last nite and spilt all our >popcorn over Minako!" explained Usagi. MIKE: [Usagi] And when I tried to eat the popcorn, Minako's hair got all inside my mouth! TOM: Mike, that's gross. >"It was an accident!" protested Chibi-Usa. >"If I die from starvation, you'll never be born Chibi-Usa!" >threatened Usagi. TOM: [Usagi] Wait a minute... you're already here, so if I starve myself, the universe will collapse. Better not do that. >"Pu wouldn't let that happen." Chibi-Usa correctly pointed out. > ALL: (weakly) Ha, ha, ha, ha. CROW: Who's *Pu*? MIKE: I think she meant Sailor Pluto. >"Breakfast is coming right up, MIKE: [Usagi, defensively] Hey!! I'm not bulimic!! > after I get dressed," said Makoto >as soon as she could get a word in. She went into her bedroom. >Ami grabbed her bag and headed into the bathroom. Rei >straightened her crumpled clothes. Chibi-Usa struggled out of >her long nighty and into her clothes. Usagi was already dressed >so she brushed her hair and fashioned her odango. TOM: Nobody will be admitted during the riveting "getting ready scene!" CROW: *Thrill* as the senshi dress up in the morning!! > Tom: To her head with a earring. MIKE: And then there's *these* guys. >Makoto came out of her bedroom dressed in brown slacks and a >green t-shirt. Her hair was back to it's normal style. TOM: Counter worker at Burger King. > Crow: Ponytail that look like come from a brown Zoyitice. CROW: There it is again!! MIKE: Is Doc Thinker obsessed with Zoyicite, or what? >"How about an American breakfast of toast, bacon and eggs?" >asked Makoto. > ALL: YEAH!!! SOUNDS GOOD!!! TOM: I'm hungry!! MIKE: Really? TOM: No. >"Yummy yummy!" yelled Usagi. CROW: [Usagi] In my tummy!! MIKE: Yummy, yummy, yummy! I got love in my tummy... TOM: Stop right there. >"Mmmm sounds good Mako-chan," said Rei. Ami walked back into the >lounge fully dressed. MIKE: Yeah, usually Ami eats breakfast fully nude. > Tom: In her school outfit. TOM: Huh? >"Is anyone going to wake Minako up?" she asked. >"Let her sleep, I think she's having some good dreams," CROW: [Makoto] IfyaknowwhatImean!! > Makoto >said with a wink, from the kitchen where she was beginning >breakfast. > Tom: She start an fire!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! > Crow: This fan-fic should be on fire!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! MIKE: Amen to *that*! >As if on cue, Minako began to talk in her sleep again. >"Adam, who's Lisa?... what do you mean she's a girl you > Mike: (Adam) The last Black Ranger. TOM: Not *only* is Thinker obsessed with Zoyicite, he's also obsessed with the Black Ranger!! AAARRRGGGHHHH!! CROW: Hang on Tom, the end is near. >liked?... oh you haven't seen her in years... oh Adam I love you >too!" MIKE: [Adam] Really? COOL! > Tom: EEEEEEEEEEWW!!! Sex. > Crow: Sex I like it!! Mike: Crow!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! MIKE: That doesn't really sound like something Crow would say. CROW: I *really* hate this other me! >Minako began to scrunch up her face as if she was kissing >someone. >"Is that what I look like when I'm asleep?" asked Usagi. >"Yes!" all the girls said. Usagi blushed. >"Ohhh Adam, you smell so good... mmmm bacon and eggs..." TOM: Minako then realizes that she has bitten into Adam's arm. CROW: Well, this is definitely *our* Tom. >Minako's eyes opened, "Bacon and eggs? It's breakfast time >already?" > Tom: (Makoto) Yep, you little sleep-head. > Crow: Okay. MIKE: What is going on here? Are we in hell or something? TOM: You asked that question before, I think... and the answer was *yes*. >"Will someone butter the toast please? And set the table?" asked >Makoto. > Crow: I like to butter you. > Mike: Crow!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! CROW: Been there, done that! TOM: *sob* When will it end?! This is more painful than having a root canal! >"I'll do the toast," said Ami. >"I'll set the table," voluntered Usagi. >"You're so clumsy you'll break the dishes! I'll do it," Rei >said, grabbing some plates. MIKE: Ow! >"Rei you're so mean!" wailed Usagi. CROW: [Usagi] You stole my commas!! >Makoto dished up the bacon and eggs onto one big plate and put >it on the table. Ami carried the toast over. TOM: Then, inexplicably, Ami rubs the buttered side of the toast on Minako's hair. > Tom: Like a school girl carries her books. MIKE: Ami reading toast? Pshaw!! >"Minako, if you want anything to eat, I suggest you get here >pronto!" advised Makoto as Usagi and Chibi-Usa dived into the >food. CROW: Bacon and eggs sailed all over the room. "Oh, the humanity!!" Usagi cried. > Tom: Like a hot knife thought butter. TOM: Now I'm quoting butter?! KILL ME!!! >Minako struggled up. She saw that she was still in her Sailor V >fuku and blushed, hurriedly changing back to normal and making >it to the table in time to grab the last piece of toast. CROW: It's a mini version of Usagi's morning scthick! > Tom: She chocked on it and died. > Crow: You are dark, today. MIKE: I don't know, that was more *lamely dark*. TOM: Allow me. [clears throat] As Minako's eyes closed, she looked around the table at her so-called friends, silently asking why they laced the toast with arsenic. CROW: You're evil, Tom. >"What did you guys get up to last night?" asked Rei. Ami blushed MIKE: [Ami] First base!! CROW: [snickers] TOM: You're a bad influenza. > Tom: Nothing that would be pleasure to you taste. TOM: Baking soda? >immediatly and ducked her head so Rei couldn't see. Usagi's >stomach growled. Minako smiled and sighed. Chibi-Usa scowled. >Makoto rolled her eyes. MIKE: Then they rolled against the wall and bounced back to her. TOM: Getting a fifteen. > Tom: How do you roll your heads. Crow: Just relax, it's only a rotten fan-fiction. CROW: I know two author's heads that are gonna be rolling after this one!! MIKE: Easy, Crow. >"Ookay, now how about this time telling me in words?" TOM: Maybe Dr. Thinker wrote the fanfic, and Bridger did the riffing. CROW: It's almost interchangeable. >"Nothing," said Ami. >"Chibi-Usa made me starve," said Usagi. >"I dreamt of Andy, except I kept calling him Adam for some >reason, but he was so cute!" said Minako. MIKE: [Minako] Andy... Adam... same difference! >"Usagi made me go to bed early!" said Chibi-Usa. >"Everyone else fell asleep on me," said Makoto, then looked at >Ami and added, "Literallly in some cases." Ami blushed again and >said, "Gomen." TOM: [Ami] Sheesh!! Suddenly *I'm* the jerk! >"And I thought I told you not to apolgise?" Makoto said smiling. >"Gomen Mako-chan, I won't do it again." >"Ami-chan!" Everyone collasped into giggles, including Ami. CROW: Hooray!! They've got Laughing Sickness!! MIKE: That's kinda dark. > Tom: This was stink like one of Dr. Thinker's fan-fiction. TOM: I think that Dr. Thinker is self-abusive. MIKE: Well, this fic and riffing abused us, so maybe he's sharing the pain. > Crow: At least they was not notes. CROW: Telling my dopple to learn grammar. > >--- >Footnotes > ALL: AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAARRRGHH >(Tom's head and Crow's head explodes) > Mike: Look like I'm alone. TOM: [angry] OKAY!! YOU'VE HAD IT, THINKER!!! ARRRRRGGHGHGHGH!!!! [jumps at the screen trying to destroy it] MIKE: TOM!! TOM!! Settle down!! TOM!! [TOM finally stops from exertion, various parts of him scattered around the seat.] CROW: Sensitive little guy, isn't he? >[1] - I'm refering to Mighty Morphin Power Rangers, of which the >first season used the fighting footage from the Japanese show >Kouru Sentai ZyuRanger. Yes I know I romanised it differently in >the story :) CROW: Romanised? Is that a word? MIKE: This is the longest slumber party story in the world. CROW: Yeah, I was pretty disappointed. It had potential, though... MIKE: Crow... > Mike: Ju or Zyu, it is still the stupid source for 50 out of the > 60's first season eposides of "Power Rangers". CROW: Looks like Dr. Thinker and Tom have a lot in commmon... Power Ranger fanboys! TOM: [weakly] I heard that, Crow. >[2] - Boi is the yellow ranger in ZyuRanger. > Mike: Boy is who you spell it, brainless other. MIKE: Yeah!! You tell him... uh... me? >[3] - This does work, take it from someone who's tried it :) CROW: [falsetto] Hooked on Phonics... worked... well, somewhat... for me!! MIKE: Hey, Crow... you need an emoticon. CROW: Oh, yeah... :P > Mike: No, thanks >[4] - It's "The Curse". > Mike: The curse of the stupid fan-ficton. Let me out of here!! MIKE: Hey, if it's anyone that's cursed, it's *us*!! > ------------------------------------------------------- > CROW: [singing] Light as a theather... >(SOL) >(Tom & Crow are back to normal. Mike is standing in the middle of > Crow and Tom) MIKE: Ow!! That's got to hurt!! CROW: Personally, I think it would be difficult to fuse with you two. TOM: [weakly] YOU WILL BE ASSIMILATED. > Mike: Good and Bad about his fan-fiction. > Crow: Good..some sex. Bad..no many Japanese words. Mike: He is a RAM CHIP. CROW: No, I am a *robot*. Pay attention. > Crow: Thanks. > Mike: Tom, your turn. > Tom: Tom, Good..the plot. Bad-the spellings. > Mike: I couldn't say it better myself. He's a ram chip. What do > you think, sir? MIKE: Okay... Good... I'm still alive. Bad... This whole thing SUCKED LIKE A $10 PROSTITUTE!!! CROW: Calm down, Mike... this thing is getting to you! >(DEEP 13) >(Dr. Thinker is holding a labcomputer) MIKE: He means a *laptop*, right? CROW: [Thinker] Damn!! These Dell workstations sure are heavy! > Dr. Thinker: Fine job, nice. I watch you for a bit. I wonder why > you fell a sleep? MIKE: We couldn't fall asleep, there was too much pain. > Mike: (off-screen) The plot was turning out on. > Crow & Tom: (off-screen) Yep. > Dr. Thinker: I just learn that Dr. F win that Zoanikon Award, > finally. It's power is make the idea go over 100%. He win it a > tape of "This Insland Earth!" Time for me to push the button. CROW: This... Insland... Earth? MIKE: Just smile and nod. > BANG! MIKE: Oh, they're dead. I can live with that. >(Mike, Crow & Tom screams over the credits) > THE END. > ---------------------------------------------------------------- > Hey. Enjoy. E-Mail me! > ----------------------------------------------------------------- CROW: Why don't you just jump up my butt! MIKE: Crow!! CROW: Sorry. [MIKE picks up TOM and takes him out of the Theater] (DOOR SEQUENCE) 1... 2... 3... 4... 5... 6... 7... Mike and the bots, still dressed in the fukus, rushed towards the counter and dove underneath it. "The pepto Bismo is mine," Tom shouted. "No, It's mine," Crow said. "Guys, guys," Mike said, getting both of their attention. "It's mine!" As the three fought for the medicine to alleviate their pain, the red light started to flash. In their flailing, Mike's hand slapped it. DEEP 13 "Hit it again, Frank," Dr. Forrester shouted, lifting his own sledgehammer and bringing it down on the Bad Scene Rerunner. Frank, breathing heavily from the exertion, lifted his sledgehammer and brought it down one final time on the invention. Dented, smashed, and with most of the hologram projectors damaged, the invention gave a shower of sparks before and died. "Thank god," Dr. Forrester said, removing his dark glasses. "For a while there, I thought we were doomed to watch those sex scenes over and over again for all eternity." "Yeah. A good thing we used that cheaper grade of cast iron steel," Frank commented, leaning on his sledgehammer. "Well, you're alive," Dr. Forrester said, peering into the camera and seeing Mike and the bots wrestling. "So I suppose you survived the fanfic. Until next time. Frank, push the button." Seeing the big red button, Frank gave a scream of fright and brought the sledgehammer down on it. BLIP!!! FWWWOOOOOOOSSSSSSSSSHHHHHHH!!! \ / \ / \ / 0 / \ / \ / \ "You idiot," said Dr. Forrester. ________________________________________________________________________ Hoped you like this cooperative effort to riff the bad riffing! Send any C & C for Jamie Jeans to: xwing@perf.bc.ca Send any C & C for Seth C. Triggs to: trigsc41@buffalostate.edu