Project A-ko: The College Years Chapter 1 WRITTEN BY: Michael Coughlan and Greg Thompson MSTIED BY: Jamie Jeans a.k.a. JOLT!!! Well, here is the first chapter of the second part of A-ko: TCY. When you go to read this, try not to apply any sort of logic to it nor keep your eyes open during the sex scenes. It's for your own good. Anyhow, I've finally figured out which characters I'm sticking with in order to riff the fanfics: Shampoo, Samantha, and Washu. I like these characters best and they are fun to write riffs for. And for the record, this is not my twenty-ninth fanfic, but a continuation of my twenty-eighth. After this one, there are about eight more. Joy... LEGAL STUFF: The concept and creation of Club Anipike belongs to Nightbreak, whom I am grateful to for allowing me to use it. Washu belongs to Pioneer Inc while Shampoo belongs to A.D Video. Samantha Jones, however, belongs to me, Jamie Jeans. Now, on to the story! ________________________________________________________________________ Standing on a raised dais in the middle of the Club Anipike, with various characters from all over Anime watching and cheering, Samantha Jones, dressed in her usual black body suit, watched her opponent warily. She hadn't believed that the person she was fighting now was so good at Martial Arts, but she had quickly gotten over her first appraising of the character and was treating her seriously. Shifting from her loose T-stance, she fell into a cat-stance and went low, swinging her right foot out. It worked and her black-haired opponent went down, but immediately rolled back and jumped to her feet. Still recovering from her leg sweep, the opponent closed in and launched a flurry of punches, throwing the redhead off balance. Blocking them as best as she could, Samantha could do nothing when the woman went low and tripped her up. Before she could get up, her opponent's foot was at her throat. The crowd booed good heartedly and dispersed from the dais, various characters either collecting or giving money to Nabiki. She chuckled. "It looks like you win... Belldandy," Samantha said. The first class Unlimited Goddess, dressed in a black karate Gi, removed her foot and smiled sweetly, offering the redhead her hand. Samantha took it and stood up. "I didn't think you were so good at this," she said. "There's a lot that the average otaku does not know about what I do in my spare time," Belldandy replied. "Obviously, so do you." "Indeed. I have been most humbled by our match. Want a drink?" "Thank you." "Oh Samantha!" called out a voice. Looking over the crowd, the redhead spotted the genius scientist standing by the door with Shampoo standing beside her. Immediately, she knew that it was time to review another horrible fanfic. "Sorry to cut out like this Belldandy, but I have another appointment to attend to. I'll buy you that drink later on," Samantha said. Belldandy smiled sweetly. "Okay, Samantha. I look forward to it, as well as another sparring match. You are quite good." "Thanks." Waving good-bye, the redhead left. * * * "So what happened to Priss and Nuku-Nuku?" Samantha asked. "Nuku-Nuku didn't feel like reviewing anymore of these fanfics, once she heard that they were lemons, and Priss gave me back the money said that she had better things to do," Washu explained. "Too bad Rei not here. She good riffer," Shampoo said. "I know," Samantha replied. "Especially with us reviewing this crap: A-ko: The College Years." The three women were, once again, seated in the theater created by the genius scientist and were preparing to riff. "Here we go," Washu said, hitting a button on her smoky black laptop. > Chapter 1: or IT'S TO EARLY FOR THIS SHIT! SHAMPOO: Ah! Not even one sentence into story and already there cursing! SAMANTHA: It gets worst. Believe me... WASHU: Oh boy! A multiple choice test! I'll pick Chapter one... >A-ko's room: 5:30am: SAMANTHA: Do you know where your children are? WASHU: Trying to get Tenchi... > _I don't believe it!_ A-ko thought grudgingly. SHAMPOO: One accepts defeat grudgingly, not think it. WASHU: The thoughts beat A-ko? >The one day she can finally sleep >in and she's up before her parents. WASHU: Proper pretenses! Proper pretenses! Where art thou proper pretenses? >_What am I going to do now, I've always slept in?_ SHAMPOO: You could try going back to sleep. >A-ko somewhat enthusiastic to be up and at least partially verbal this early, gets up and >raises the blinds in her room only to see the most strange thing. SAMANTHA: No one will be seated during the intense *Rasing the blinds* scene! > Below A-ko's bedroom window Asa and Ine are sifting through the Magami's >garbage WASHU: Ah-hah! So this is how they come up with money! By recycling! >while Mari is helping Ume, holding video equipment, get up into a tree. _That's how >all those pictures of me naked got over to the Graviton High School for Boys,_ A-ko >thought, full of rage. ALL: Huh? SAMANTHA: Did we miss something? SHAMPOO: They hand out naked pictures of A-ko? WASHU: Ah-hah! Yes we did! Apparently, there was an earlier fanfic written by one of the author of this story:Greg Thompson. It was a pretty bad crossover between Nuku-Nuku and A-ko... SHAMPOO: She not get paid enough to stare in cheesy fanfic... At least, that what Shampoo hear! SAMANTHA: Please tell me we're not going to review *that* one! WASHU: We won't. It already was... SHAMPOO: Thank goodness for small favor. >A-ko's anger quickly turned to embarrassment as she remembered >one of the joint functions between her school and the boy's school. And how all the >boys >were staring and drooling over her. SAMANTHA: Those drool stains are easy to get out with just hot water. WASHU: Just a thought, but did she take care of Mari and Ume before they got the camera into the tree? >All of a sudden, some boy with really thick glasses >jumped out of nowhere, yelling about the pictures and defending her honor, SHAMPOO: Huh? When did Mousse star in fanfic? SAMANTHA: Hang on... Yes! That guy is actually one of the self-inserted authors who named himself Myles and styled himself after Mousse. WASHU: How do you know all of this? SAMANTHA: I reviewed A-ko:TCY Part 2. >he was pulled >back by a large group of boys and they savagely pummeled. WASHU: Ah! The best part of a fanfic they wrote and we missed it! >Only then did she find out about >what was going on. Never the less, the headmaster of the school wasn't to happy when >she >trashed the gymnasium hunting down every guy that had copies of all the pictures. SHAMPOO: That A-ko... Always flying off the handle about the tiniest things. >After >that incident, no boy wanted to dance with her. And now seeing who was responsible >she >has REALLY PISSED OFF! SAMANTHA: And we have... REALLY BAD ACTION SEQUENCE!!! > At that moment, as Asa was opening the final bag of the morning. Ine WASHU: Supposed to have a comma there. >with a loud >CRASH! knocked over one of the metal cans with her foot. Asa immediately turned to >throw >her a mean glance SHAMPOO: Which Ine caught expertly. SAMANTHA: Maybe she should sign up with the New York Mets next year. >but then realized that after three years of surveillance and several >other loud mishaps they never had awoken A-ko or her parents. WASHU: They've been doing this for tree years? And here I thought B-ko had a thing for C-ko, not A-ko. >Sleeping soundly must >run in their family. > Suddenly, there were several loud crashes and a whizzing noise coming from the >house. Asa, Ine, Ume and Mari in unison: "OH FUCK, WERE SCREWED...RUN!!!" SHAMPOO: What did they do in unison? And why write such bad language? >About a >quarter second after that. The WASHU: Forgot another comma there. SAMANTHA: stop that. You'll only hurt yourself. >back door (and the surrounding walls) were smashed >open looking similar to a house being shot by a tank. SAMANTHA: Oww, my head. SHAMPOO: Just reading that give Shampoo headache. WASHU: Bad Grammar, no commas... >As the debris and dust cleared, >a lone figure stood in the doorway (or hole if you prefer), SAMANTHA: Hmmm, one of the author's thoughts. SHAMPOO: Authors have thoughts? >A-ko's figure. WASHU: Which can now be bought at your local toy store. > "So your the ones that ruined my chance for happiness!!" A-ko spat out. But >before any of B-ko's stooges could utter an answer, they found themselves being >tossed about like dolls. Their suffering only ending WASHU: So A-ko is beating them up by throwing them several times. >when A-ko realized that her >shirt must have been torn off when she went running through the house (and several >walls) SHAMPOO: Don't you run through several walls when you run through house? >and that she was now >standing in her backyard almost naked. SAMANTHA: Whoa! Someone is feeling a breeze! >How embarrassing, she though to herself, >trying to cover up her (insert figure numbers here Greg) SHAMPOO: If silly otaku adds figures... WASHU: You'll what? SHAMPOO: Not sure. Just sounded good to add in there. >body. "And that's nothing >compared to what your 'mistress' is going to get when I see her." ALL: ROYAL RUMBLE!!! > Happy with herself, (yet still extremely embarrassed about her current situation), >A-ko turned to go back inside. Her happiness quickly turned to sorrow SAMANTHA: And said, "Let's get out of this fanfic." >as she gazed over >the rubble of what was the side of her home for the passed three years. Her sorrow then >turned to misery as she realized the noise must have been disturbed her parents as they >were standing with fire in there eyes. WASHU: Ouch! They need some visine... stat! >"Sorry," was all A-ko could say. ALL: Wah-wah-wahhhhh!!! > ------------- >Several Hours Later at breakfast... SHAMPOO: Which made it dinnertime... > "That's so unfair!" A-ko cried. "Why do I have to pay for the damages? You >guys are so mean! Don't we have insurance for something like this?" she whined. SAMANTHA: Getting insurance when you have either bit of superhuman ability is really tough, eh Shampoo? SHAMPOO: WASHU: Just a thought, but shouldn't she have jumped out the window or used the door instead of smashing her way though it all? SAMANTHA: What? And ruin the comedy relief? No way! >A-ko looked at her father with teary, puppydog eyes. _He never could resist this >face_, thought A-ko. SHAMPOO: That secret Puppy-Eyes Technique! > Clark turned to his daughter with a stern face that slowly began to melt >away into a smile. He loves his daughter with all his heart and could never >contribute to her unhappiness. SAMANTHA: Heh heh heh... Old guy fell for it again... >As he was about to say something... > "Don't you pull that crap with me, young lady," Diana spoke coldly to >A-ko from across the room, "You're not getting away that easy." A-ko's mother >walked over to Clark and grabbed him up by the ear, "And you better keep quiet >until I've delt with the situation." SHAMPOO: Why she do that to him? It A-ko that wrecked house, not him... SAMANTHA: Details, details... > "Sure dear. Anything you say dear," Clark whispered quietly, remembering >what she did to him with her golden lasso the last time he spoke back, he immediately >stepped aside so his wife could sit a speak with their daughter. WASHU: You can almost hear the spine turning into jelly and being sucked out. SAMANTHA: If Wonder Woman and Superman got married... SHAMPOO: Lois be pissed! > A-ko's plan crumbled before her, as she realized she has never been able to >manipulate her mother before. SHAMPOO: She need secret BS technique now! >_What should I do?, thought A-ko looking at the >amazon of a woman now sitting before her. _She's always so intimidating when she >acts this way. I have it, I'll get out of this using superior reasoning._ "But, >mo.." SAMANTHA: That never works, and you should never start with *but mom*. They cut that off right away. > "Don't 'but mom' me, missy! It's about time you took responsibility in your >powers" Diana hissed. WASHU: She's turning into a snake! Ah! >"Now trashing the city is one thing, but ruining our beautiful >home to go and play with your friends is another matter entirely." SAMANTHA: Tossing people around is not exactly *playing* with them. SHAMPOO: Do it all the time in Nerima. SAMANTHA: I stand corrected. >A-ko's mom reached >over and >tenderly took her daughters hands in hers. WASHU: And blood proceeded to pour all over the table. SAMANTHA & SHAMPOO: WASHU: Sorry, but it was too easy to pass up. >"I'm sorry, but in order to fix our house, >we need all the money upfront. The only way to do that is to use your tuition money >for college, honey. Now we don't like this any more than you do," lowering her head >to look at their hands. "You will just have to get a job and go to Graviton University >and Undergraduate College." SAMANTHA: And be in debt for the rest of your life. WASHU: That sounds about right. > "Noooooooo!" A-ko cried. "Anything but that, please." SHAMPOO: A-ko turning into Usagi right in front of eyes! >Dropping to her knees, >A-ko began to kiss her mother's feet, hoping against hope that she would change her >mind. After all, she's watched her mom and her dad at night and has seen her father >doing the same thing, and she seemed to enjoy it. WASHU: Do they know she watches them? And since when has Diana been a dominatrix? SAMANTHA: Oh man, I'm going to be sick... SHAMPOO: Shampoo feel hairball coming up... > "A-ko...." Diana whispered. SHAMPOO: You're ruining shoes. > Quite suddenly, the door bell rang. A-ko's head shot up from her mothers foot >and leaped towards the door. SAMANTHA: And blood splattered all over the kitchen. > _Hrumph!,_ thought Diana, _and I was beginning to enjoy >myself too._ WASHU: Ah-hah! She *is* a dominatrix! >A-ko peered out the peephole of the door. Only to be thrown back >several steps at the sight of the largest mouth she had ever seen. It was C-ko. > "YAHOO, A-KO!!!", the blond girl screamed. "I MADE US SOME LUNCH!!! >WE CAN >HAVE A PICNIC TODAY!!!" ALL: OWW!!! SHAMPOO: Now Shampoo deaf for life. WASHU: What? SHAMPOO: Shampoo said Shampoo now deaf for life! WASHU: WHAT? SHAMPOO: SHAMPOO SAID... Oh, never mind! SAMANTHA: I love that old joke. >The girl backed up and began to yell at A-ko's bedroom >window. "YOU UP YET, A-KO? She's such a sleepy head," C-ko said to herself >outloud. SAMANTHA: You dolt! You're supposed to think that, not say it. >A-ko opened the door to meet her best friend. "C-ko, I didn't expect you here so soon, >please come in." WASHU: Stay a while... Stay forever! BWAHAHAHAHAHA!!! >Truthfully, A-ko could predict to the exact second when she would >arrive at her door. > "Thanks, A-ko" C-ko, seeing A-ko's parents in the kitchen, skips over and in >a sudden boost of enthusiasm, "GOOD MORNING, A-KO'S PARENTS!" SAMANTHA: My god! How much sugar does she eat in the morning? SHAMPOO: More interested why she hasn't hit puberty, even after graduating. WASHU: Must be something to do with the glands... > "My aren't we happy today," Clark smiled, "why this C-ko?" >Without hesitation, C-ko produced a large envelope marked --"IMPORTANT OPEN >IMMEDIATELY"--,"I GOT INTO MYNJOIN!!!" In a flash, as if struck by lightning, >the >entire Magami family falls to the floor. ALL: Ow! SAMANTHA: I was fully expecting this, but it still came as a shock. SHAMPOO: It ain't called *The College Years* for nothing. WASHU: This is more shocking then the time... Actually, I can't think of a more shocking event then this! > "WHAT? HOW THE HELL DID YOU GET INTO THERE?" screamed A-ko. ALL: SAMANTHA: Great, now we're all deaf for life. SHAMPOO: What? SAMANTHA: I ain't falling for that trick! >Sitting on the >floor with a dumbfounded look across her face. > "Watch that language, young lady," her parents interrupted. "You should be >happy for your little friend." Though they were asking themselves that very same >question. WASHU: Someone must have paid a lot of money in order for C-ko to get into College. > "That's ok, Mr. and Mrs. Magami. Nobody was more surprised than me." C-ko >stated with glee. "Well, except for my foster-parents, the medical guys were still >working on my dad when I left to come over here. Isn't it great, A-ko!" SHAMPOO: What? Step-dad have heart attack and you leave? What of daughter *are* you? > "What? That you got into one of the most expensive schools or that your step- >dad had a heart attack?" A-ko mumbled. She was becoming annoyed with the fact that >she has to work just to pass high school. Then C-ko, of all people, gets a full boat >to a university! WASHU: That's College she's going to. Get it right. SAMANTHA: And as for being annoyed, blame it all on a horrible twist of faith. > Still smiling, "A-ko, your such a kidder. You know what I mean, that we get to >go to college together," C-ko began to go into a song about her ALL: AH! She's going to sing! >and A-ko going to >college. (Greg, you wanna put the song into the story or just leave it narrated?) > SAMANTHA: Wow! The first bit of truth in this story finally seeps up to the surface. > Not being able to stand it any more, A-ko briefly explains the gruesome story >about how she would have to go to a different college. "Then you don't want to be >with me? You...me...WHAAAAAAA!!!!" WASHU: Actually, it just means that you're going to different colleges. SHAMPOO: First happy and singing, then crying. This girl have some strange mood swings! SAMANTHA: I just hope Mike and Greg don't elaborate on that... >Seeing what was about to happen, A-ko's parents, >with their super human speed and reflexes, grab buckets and begin to catch and then >bail tears out what was once their back door. SHAMPOO: That exaggerating comedy relief far too much! SAMANTHA: Not to mention taking the light joke that A-ko's parents are Superman and Wonder Woman too far. >After about fifteen minutes of this, >and A-ko trying to calm her screaming friend down... WASHU: How? She duct taped her mouth shut? > "Hey, I got it!" C-ko exclaimed, smiling, as if the last quarter of an hour >never happened. "I'll just go to your college!" SAMANTHA: Now there's a joyous thought. > "Do you think that ...", A-ko quickly reminds herself what might happen if >she continued her sentence and said, "That's a wonderful idea, C-ko." SHAMPOO: Caught between wailing friend and hard place... > "GREAT! LETS GO EAT, AND I CAN SHOW YOU MY PINK PINEAPPLE >PANTIES!", C-ko grabbed A-ko, and they were out the door. ALL: YUCK! WASHU: That's a horrible design! SAMANTHA: Not to mention bad color clashing... SHAMPOO: They even make pink, pineapple, panties? WASHU: Now why would C-ko want to show A-ko her new panties? SAMANTHA: Argh! I just remembered! This is where it starts!!! SHAMPOO: What start? SAMANTHA: C-ko turning into a lesbian! EVERYONE ELSE: > "...Pink...pineapple...panties? Honey, you don't think A-ko and C-ko could >be..." Clark and Diana look at each other. "NAH!" > "UPSTAIRS NOW, CLARK!" Diana exclaimed. Clark looked puzzled, "B-but what >did I..." SHAMPOO: You spoke! That good enough reason! > "I SAID NOW..." Diana ordered pulling her golden lasso from behind her back. > Seeing this Clark ran a fast as he could, and yet could still feel the hot >lasso whipping his ass raw. SAMANTHA: Okay, that was something we didn't need to see. WASHU: I had no idea that the magic metal which made up Wonder Woman's lasso could conduct heat so well. Nor did I know that Superman was vulnerable to it. SHAMPOO: For moment there, Shampoo thought you go on about Diana being dominatrix. WASHU: Nah! I don't feel like running that into the ground. > ------------- SHAMPOO: Several dashes killed by this fanfic... >The Daitokuji Manor: SAMANTHA: Stately Wayne Manor... Oops! Wrong place. > B-ko sat in an armchair, staring blankly into the vid-screen in front of her. WASHU: Must be showing Sailor Moon reruns. SHAMPOO: The colors, man! >On the screen stands the dean of Mynjoin University. "Miss? Are you all right?" he >questioned. SHAMPOO: Where were you on night of fifth?! WASHU AND SAMANTHA: > "She declined the scholarship? How could she do that?" B-ko asked coldly, >with a dazed look over her face. WASHU: Very easily. She said no. SAMANTHA: I could go for a dazed donut about now. >The man decided not to answer wondering, SHAMPOO: But Shampoo thought he talking to B-ko? >_Is she >talking to me?_ B-ko shook her head back and forth, SAMANTHA: And got fifteen total. WASHU: Not going for the disembodied joke anymore, eh? >as if that would make the news >any more logical. She gazed at the man who began to produce a rather large bead of >sweat over his >right brow. ALL: Cannon fodder!!! >"And you did 'all' you could to dissuade her from making this her >decision? Of course you did. I won't trouble you any further and sir...". SHAMPOO: I'll just kill you later... SAMANTHA: Hey! I'm supposed to be making the dark comments here. >The >man interrupted her, "No trouble at all, I am happy to have been of service. I >must be going now, please give my regards to your father." The man reached for >the hang-up switch when the lovely >young lady on the other end began to finish her previous statement, "...the land >that I so generously donated to your university has been revoked. You knew the deal." SHAMPOO: Knew there was string attached. > The man began to visibly panic. "B-but, we already began to build the new >tech center. If you take away the land B-ko..." "EXCUSE ME?" B-ko exclaimed, >"What did you call me?" WASHU: Uh oh! Someone thread over the line! >Now scared, the man manages to stammer out, "I'm sorry >my mistress, please let me throw myself upon your mercy!" WASHU: This whole dominatrix thing is getting out of hand. >"For which I have none, >'sir', good day." SAMANTHA: Good night! You've been a good crowd! WASHU & SHAMPOO: > B-ko smiled at how well she handled that sweaty little man. Though she >remembered the serious problem that the news he reported, presented. WASHU: If you're going to start a new sentence there, then that word should have been *Although*, not *though*. >_Drat >you, C-ko! Why have you done this? Even you can't be that naive! Why have you >refused my gift? This has to be A-ko's doing, she would stop at nothing to keep >me from you! And for this, she must PAY!!_ SAMANTHA: With her Visa Gold! SHAMPOO: Sure, sure. Blame everything on A-ko. B-ko no better then Akane sometimes. >After successfully regaining her >composure, and realizing that she had just frightened her maid, Claudia, WASHU: Someone's modeling career sure has gone downhill. >she >straightened her dress and addressed her, "Have my slav... I mean, friends >arrived yet?" The young maid nodded and showed in B-ko's goon squad. SAMANTHA: All dressed up in bandages and casts... > Standing in their usual order before B-ko, wrapped in casts and bandages they >all stood supporting one another. WASHU: Good call, Sam. SAMANTHA: Thank you. >"What happened?" B-ko asked giving a slight (an >everso slight) indication that she cared. SHAMPOO: B-ko cares about cannon fodder? >With in several minutes of wild >explanation and exaggeration. WASHU: There came a period and everyone stopped. >"You mean you failed?", B-ko questioned. SHAMPOO: Where you be on night of fourth? SAMANTHA & WASHU: >The girls >lowered their heads in shame. "And this was because of A-ko, and not your >incompetence?" SAMANTHA: That's true enough. How else are normal people supposed to deal with someone that's built on about three-hundred-forty two points? >The girl's eyes brightened with a glimmer of hope. "Then A-ko must >feel my wrath...and you my sweet little girls..." The girl's faces glowed in the >mock admiration that B-ko was giving them. SHAMPOO: I mock you with admiration! Hang on, that not come out right... >"..must be punished." The girls drop >to the floor as B-ko turned to pull one of her many >toy's from her closet. WASHU: Hmmm, I see: Sailor Moon dolls, tickle me Ranma, tickle me Elmo, tickle me Snarf... What the... > ------------- > "Claudia! Claudia! What's all that noise up there?" a tall regal man shouted. SAMANTHA: WHAT?! HANG ON! LET ME TURN DOWN THE STEREO! >Claudia, the maid, ran down the stairs, crying. WASHU: Ten years of modeling school, several years of modeling and I end up as a maid! >"Master Hikaru, it's mistress...I >mean Miss B-ko, she locked her bedroom door and all I can hear is terrible sounds >coming from within." SHAMPOO: That too gross to even go near. SAMANTHA: Yeah, and besides, that's my schtick... >_Damn, B-ko. She had better start acting more mature or else >my alma mater will never accept her._ WASHU: What the heck is an alma mater? Some new name for a mother I never heard about? >"My dear Claudia, please calm down. Please >go into my room and wait for me. I'll be there shortly to 'comfort' you." SHAMPOO: That oldest line in book. >On that >note he ran up the stairs SAMANTHA: Gotta get the condoms! Gotta get the condoms! EVERYONE ELSE: SAMANTHA! SAMANTHA: Sorry. It slipped out. >and produced the master keys to the house. From behind >the door he heard a high pitched, buzzing noise and then a scream. _Dear god! >What is happening in there? _ WASHU: Oh, they're just reenacting some scenes from Ben Hurr, that's all. > Deciding not to play with the keys he slammed his shoulder into the door. > WHAM! SHAMPOO: And broke shoulder. >Upon entering, he saw what appeared to be a robot mecha in the shape of >an octopus. SAMANTHA: And she pulled this out of her closet?! >At the end of each tentacle was large vibrating phallus. Three of >the tentacles were busy holding the limp bodies of three of B-ko's friends, while >the four others probed and >pushed themselves into the body of the girl he believed was Asa. ALL: AH! WE'VE CROSSED OVER WITH OVERFIEND!!! SAMANTHA: Mike and Greg have gone too far with this! SHAMPOO: Shampoo not feel so good. WASHU: Don't worry, we're near the end. >The last tentacle >he saw, stretched across the room to a chair on the other side of the room. >Sitting on the chair, was his beautiful daughter. The tentacle was gently >sliding in and out of the lovely area between her legs. _A place he dreamed of >visiting for years, but this isn't >alt.sex.stories.incest, so enough of that!_ he thought. SAMANTHA: Hoo boy... SHAMPOO: You need pepto bismo? WASHU: Better not give it to her now. She'll just puke it up. SHAMPOO: How Hikaru know about that website anyhow? SAMANTHA: > "AHEM!" Hikaru states. WASHU: You see, he's got this really sore throat. >No response from the writhing body of his daughter. >"AHEM, B-KO!" He states again. His daughter opened her eyes. The highly erotic >scene fades away, SHAMPOO: That not erotic, that sick! SAMANTHA: Someone take that girls copy of Overfiend away from her... >only to be replaced by a beautiful meadow with a sparkling >stream and a doe and its fawn drinking merrily. Along side of his daughter are >several white fluffy bunnies hopping about. WASHU: All right, the acids kicking in. SHAMPOO: And then cute bunnies killed... SAMANTHA: Don't go dark on me... >And above several doves circle over >B-ko's head. "Yes, Father," she said, in the most innocent voice he has ever >heard, momentarily forgetting the octopus mecha or the three unconscious and >screaming girls. SHAMPOO: How unconscious girls scream? >"Honey, have you thought about which college you will be >going to?" He smiles proudly at the fruit of his loins. WASHU: First of all, I wouldn't be smiling too much if I found Ryoko in such a position. And second, I would be more concerned about *where* she got such a mecha instead of asking her which college she'll be going to. >"Why yes, daddy, I'll be >going to Graviton University and Undergraduate College." > "WHAT?" Her father exclaimed. As the doe and fawn are plowed over by a >bulldozer, only to raise a stripmall in the meadow's and stream's place. And >the two bunnies turn rabid and begin to attack one another leaving two bloody >bodies in the aftermath. And from a distance, a gun rang and around B-ko, >feathers fall. SHAMPOO: Hah! I knew it. SAMANTHA: Good call... > "Huh?" B-ko said. Just realizing her situation SAMANTHA: What kind of drugs is she taking... and where can I get some? I'll need them to get through anymore of this fanfic. >and began to frantically cover >her (place breast size here) breasts from her fathers eyes. "WHAT?" her father >screams again. ALL: SHE SAID HUH? >B-ko immediately explained her situation with A-ko, C-ko and >college. Hearing this before and knowing that any argument is a waste of time, >he said he understood and >left the room. He cheered himself up, remembering the scene with the mecha >moments ago and the fact that his young maid is awaiting him in his bedchamber. SAMANTHA: A yes. Just another typical day at the manor. WASHU: Sounds like a title for a story. SHAMPOO: Hope not. That be one sick lemon. >Back in B-ko's room... SAMANTHA: Elliot Ness and the Untouchables were finally closing in on Capone... WASHU: Now how many times have you watched the movie. SAMANTHA: Actually, none. It just sounded good. > B-ko waves smelling salts in front of each girl's face. SHAMPOO: You supposed to wave in front of nose, silly. >She then asked, "Did >you enjoy your punishment?" The girls exhausted, state, "Yes, Mistress B-ko." "And >did you need to be punished?" The girls repeated their previous answer only now >tears flowing freely. WASHU: RESISTANCE IS FUTILE. YOU WILL BE ASSIMILATED. >"Good you may leave me now, I must think." SAMANTHA: You think they should leave? Why not ask them. >They begin to >drag themselves out >the door when they say, "We love you, B-ko." "Of course you do." B-ko stated >indifferently. WASHU: I AM B-KO OF BORG. RESISTANCE IS FUTILE. SAMANTHA: Please stop that. >"And my dears..." the girls turned to face their tormentor, >"Please put your clothes back on, that's so...uncouth." ALL: YOU'RE ONE TO TALK!!! > ------------- >Far, far away. SHAMPOO: The rebellion was struggling to fight against Empire... SAMANTHA: I swear, that joke never wears out. >(Well not that far away, only across town), a voice chants from a dark, >smoky room. ALL: I will not fear fear is the killer... > "You will be mine, A-ko Magami! Yes! And no one will stand in my way! >HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA..(cough-hack-choke)..ha...I gotta stop smoking." WASHU: And we're done chapter one. SAMANTHA: Thank god for that! Oh boy... I need some pepto bismo and stat! SHAMPOO: Here, we got some in concession stand outside. WASHU: Besides, we need a twenty minute break before going on to chapter 2a. SAMANTHA: SHAMPOO: Bad choice of words, Washu.