Fortuna Samizdat Productions presents, in cooperation with Shinji's Vault of Anime MSTings.... FORTUNA FANFIC THEATRE 5000 Episode 17, part A By DadyTengu and Emiko-kun [The scene: Yarunseto's room on the Star of Revenge. The first thing one notices is the posters--the walls are literally covered with images of anime girls and actresses(although, in this setting, it is difficult to tell the one from the other), arranged with a strong sense of composition. The furnishings consist of a bed, a small table, two chairs, and a desk with a computer console, all quite ornate and expensive-looking. A keyboard and the guitarlike instrument we have seen before sit on their appropriate stands in one corner of the room, and a smallish wine rack stands in another. The desk and table hold an assortment of bottles, manga, cards, mecha models, and data chips. There is a glass on the table. There is a videogame controller of some sort plugged into the computer, and Yarunseto, in his usual uniform, is sitting on the edge of the bed playing it. A closer look would reveal that he is wearing earplugs. The door chimes, and the prince does not notice. It rings again...he goes on playing, undisturbed.] Nori-6: [O.S.]Your Highness, Tessiri is calling... [No response] Nori-6: [Still offscreen, not shouting, but very amplified]YOUR HIGHNESS... [Yarunseto gives a violent start which sends him tumbling off the bed to land with his feet in the air.] Yarun: [weakly]Come in... [Nori-6 enters, and gives the prince a long, questioning look. After an uncomfortable silence, Yarunseto rights himself and removes the earplugs.] Nori-6: May I ask- Yarun: I saw Kumiko going towards the Rec Room with that karaoke machine you built...I didn't care to take any chances. Nori-6: At any rate, your sister is calling. Yarun: So long as it's stopped her singing...[they exit] [SOR Control Room. Kumiko is already there. Yarunseto and Nori-6 enter at the side door. Kumiko taps the comms light, and the screen comes on, showing, as expected, Tessiri on the bridge of the Black Queen. For a change, she is wearing the same outfit as last time.] Kumiko: [to Yarun]About time you got here, Princey. [to screen]Lose your designer's address with your base? Heh...I'm soooo sorry. Tessiri: Not at all...it simply suited me. At any rate, we have an...interesting...guest for you today. Kumiko: If it's Touga or similar, he dies. Tessiri: How great a fool do you think me? This is someone of whom you are much more fond...although that will quite likely change when you make his acquaintance. [She gestures. Alielle runs from offscreen, and operates some controls...there is a bluegreen flash on the Black Queen, and its companion accompanies the appearance of the transport tube on the SOR. The tube opens, to reveal...that it is empty.] Kumiko: [turning to look]Uh...there's nobody in there. You miss or something? [Yarunseto wanders over to investigate] Tessiri: [A bit confused, but trying not to show it]The targeting is quite accurate enough... Xelloss: [fades in next to Yarun, looking inside the tube with closed eyes] Oh my, have you lost something? Yarun: [now leaning into the tube]Well, we were supposed to receive a guest, and it seem that he hasn't...[pause]...[stands bolt upright and looks about frantically, nearly SD]What?! Who?! Xel: [now sitting atop the tube, with a cup of tea in hand] Sore wa himitsu desu! [sips the tea, humming to himself] Kumiko: I'll take dead giveaways for $$200, Alex. Welcome to the Star of Revenge, Xel. Xel: [giggles and sets down his tea] Why thank you! Pardon my change of transportation, that little tube is just so stuffy. [waves to the screen at Tessiri] Tessiri: Perhaps so...but you were in it quite long enough. You are now trapped in this world until I decide otherwise. OHHOHOHO! Xel: [sweatdrops, eyes opening to stare at her] .... [looks over to Yarun] You know, she reminds me of this one lady an old collegue of mine used to know.... Yarun: Naga...*^^*-<3 Kumiko: Some people have no taste...Anyway, _Tessa_, this means we're seeing somebody else make Lina-sama and Zel-chan look stupid, right? Xel: [rubs his neck] Ne... Could someone tell me why exactly I'm here? Yarun: My sister found it amusing, apparently. Kumiko: If you want a _helpful_ answer...to watch bad fanfics and make fun of them. Xel: Bad fanfics? Well, isn't that- [double-takes] Sister? You're related to the Naga impersonator on the screen?!O_o Yarun: To my everlasting regret... Tessiri: If you are _quite_ finished...the captain is entirely...wrong. Today's delightful little entertainment comes from the surreal world of "Shoujo Kakumei Utena". Xel: Oh goody! When can I leave? [hops off the tube] Tessiri: When it is over. And do not think of staying out of the theatre...I do believe that the shock field I have installed extends to the subtler levels of existence. Without further ado...I present Himemiya Anthy in a role that will surprise you...in "L' Chevalier de la Malchance!" Xel: [pauses] ..I KNEW I should have brought a sleeping solution with me today, but nooooo.... [Lights and sirens] Kumiko: We've got fanfic sign! [Door sequence] Door 7:Dog bone. Door 6:Marked with the Toshitani crest, slides away toward the corners. Door 5:A pile of model Akio-cars. It spontaneously collapses, and the evil little machines drive off in random directions. Door 4:An IRC channel with an operator fight in progress. All dodge flying /kicks and proceed on. Door 3: A cardboard standee of Naga the Serpent. Yarun stares, starry-eyed and drooling; Xellos recoils; the standee, despite being two-dimensional, still falls forward of its own accord. Door 2:A drawbridge, already down. Yarun and Nori-6 go on in, Kumiko does a Douglas Fairbanks up the ropes, and Xel floats cross-legged inside, sipping tea cheerily. Door 1:A ceiling hatch, very heavy. Yarunseto simply whaps a nearby button and it flips open. [The riffers enter the theatre and sit in this order: Nori-6, Yarunseto, Xellos, Kumiko] Kumiko: Well, this is different...I mean, so far it's just been Tenchi and Slayers. Yarun: It was only a matter of time...it is rather a shared obsession for us. Xel: Oh, you too? I LOVE that Utena girl! She's so... so... easy! [giggles] [Kumiko stands and brings her elbow down on Xellos's head.] Xel: [slams down on the floor, then sounds rather dazed] I've got a lovely bunch of coconuts, deedly deedly.... Yarun: I should advise you...she's rather a fangirl, about many characters... Xel: [climbing back into his seat] Ah yes, words of warning just in time to be to late... guh. [rubs his head] >L' Chevalier De La Malchance Kumiko: Sure as hell is bad luck for us... >By Rob Barba Xel: [singing] Help me Barba, help help me Barba! Kumiko: [under breath]The random stuff too? There really are two of them... >_La Fillette Revolutionnaire Utena_ Yarun: Someone seems a bit too fond of le langue Francais... Xel: oui oui, c'est une grande embetement! >(_Shoujo Kakumei Utena_, _Revolutionary >Girl Utena_) characters are owned, trademarked, and etc. by Chiho Saito and >a whole bunch of other people. Of course, I'm not one of them. Which is a >shame, really. I think it would be nice to have some sort of profit in what >I do, as would you all, but I suppose that's not likely to happen, is it? >But I digress.... Xel: [Therapist] Goot, goot. Now, tell me vat you see in zis ink blot... Kumiko: Why caffeine and disclaimers don't mix, people... >Other intellectual properties belong to their respective creators/owners. >I'd tell you what they were but I'd like it to be a surprise. I will give >you one example, though: _The Cantebury Tales_ copyright, etc. Nori-6: Typo, copyright Rob Barba. Xel: Really? Damn. [pulls out a document, begins to fix a typo] > Geoffrey Chaucer, who has been dead for at least a few years now and is not likely to >complain about the use of his work herein. ^_^ > >SPOILER WARNING: this series takes place after the end of the whole >series...and I mean the *whole* series, Kumiko: The series, the whole series, and nothing but the series. Yarun: And that weird little monkey-mouse, but we won't go into that. >though there are no plans to use >elements of the movie. Nori-6: It seems that Mr. Barba has some basic respect for continuity. >If you are familiar with only chapters 1 ~ 13 of the >series (Vols 1 ~ 4 of Software Sculptors' videos), then you may want to take >a backseat on this one. Yarun: We take no responsibility for any visions of "the ends of the world" or sexual relations that may occur. >Otherwise, enjoy. Kumiko: Somehow, that bodes. >Additional Credits: Sword and Duelists' canticles courtesy of _The Utena >Encyclopedia_ (http://www.duelists.tj) > >@}>---`---,---- Yarun: [singing]ASCII roses... >"Tell me who admires you and loves you, Kumiko: I don't think we have the time. Xel: [waggles a finger] C'est une secret! >and I will tell you who you are." >-Charles Augustin Sainte-Beauve > >@}>---`---,---- >Une: And So It Comes to Pass Kumiko: Nice vague title... >Paris, France >March 09, 200X Yarun: Dr. Wily has escaped again! Wait, wrong setting... > The warm atmosphere of the restaurant was fine, Yarun: Pity the food was crap. >despite the bitter cold >of the spring rain. Xel: Sounds like a case of IOLD to me.... Kumiko: IOLD? What? Xel: Indoor Ozone Layer Depletion. >It was a dreary and empty day in the city, the cloudy >sky adding new shades of gray to the aged dinginess that was Paris, France. Kumiko: ...Or maybe it was just the choking cloud of smoke from all the stinky French cigarettes. Who knows? Xel: [mutters] Damn french. Yarun: It was a dark and stormy night... >Though the weatherman had claimed that it would clear up by mid-morning, >that turned out to be a sham. It had grown so dark, one could scarcely make >out the Eiffel Tower as it sat in the distance, watching over the city not >unlike one of Notre Dame's gargoyles. Yarun: By the way, this is _France_. Nori-6: Fortunately, one could also not see the eyesore that is Les Halles. > Fortunately, the chosen location, an elegant restaurant in the >Champs-Elysées district, was a suitable compensation for the weather. Les >Saveurs l'Hiver was a beautiful dining experience, Kumiko: [generic stupid American]Ewww...there's snails in it! Xel: [Also generic stupid American] Howww... muuuch... doesss... iiit... cooossst? Cooosst? COST! COST COST COST!! [normal] Ah yes, the American concept that yelling will get people to understand. >one that most tourists >tended to avoid because of the rather significant size of the bill. Yarun: ...and the tendency to encounter random contrivances. > They >had an excellent wine cellar, and the service was beyond compare. Oriel >thought it almost a decent compensation, not only for the weather but also >the fact that her longtime associate was running late once more. Xel: ...And those two ideas relate... how? > Oriel was a stunning woman in middle age. Despite the stresses of her >life, she managed to keep her looks and figure, all without a care in the >world. Kumiko and Yarun: [simultaneously]Avatar! Xel: [sweatdrops at them, then addresses Nori-6] This happens a lot, I take it? Nori-6: Indeed. Shared suffering creates a powerful bond... Xel: ....Oh dear, I do so hope I get out of here soon. >Her classically beautiful face was clear of age, and setting her >perfect cobalt-blue eyes and cyan-shaded hair. Yarun: She once went by "Ryouko", but had since gotten contact lenses and false papers. Nori-6: The sentence was clear of sense, and setting a singularly poor structure. >Dressed in an elegant dress >and furs, she was the perfect picture of poise and cool at the table. Kumiko: Maybe it's Maetel with a dye job. Xel: Maybe it's Zelas-sama with a dye job? ...Oh, no, wait. Her furs are natural. Silly me! >One >might figure her to be a model or an actress, and certainly not what she >truly was. Kumiko: A random Mary Sue? Yarun: A lady of the night? > Oriel turned to a rather nondescript man seated next to her. Yarun:...And the silhouettes make their triumphant return. >"Where is >that blasted woman? Xel: They seek her here; They seek her there; Those Frenchies seek her everywhere... >She is always so damn late to these meetings, Hervé. I >can never understand why she cannot ever--" > "--make it to these meetings on time," a voice announced behind her. Kumiko: Nice entrance. >Dropping into the seat next to her and across from Hervé, was a woman far >younger than Oriel, and possibly far more beautiful. Yarun: Perhaps Oriel isn't the avatar after all... >She had long amethyst >hair and eyes Xel: [sweatdrops] My gods, it's my evil- er, good doppleganger! WAUGH! [leaps behind his seat] >that were a startling blue-green, though they were covered >behind a pair of eyeglasses. Kumiko: Er...you're supposed to take the eye mask _off_ when you wake up. Xel: [peers over the back of his chair] Wait, how can we see the color when she has sunglasses on? Nori-6: If this is who it seems, why would she have returned to wearing eyeglasses? >Her skin was a honey brown that seemed as warm >and kind as her personality. Kumiko: And we know about her personality _how_? >Her face was indescribable, a beautiful >mixture that hinted at possible Oriental ancestry somewhere in her >bloodlines. Kumiko: [stupid voice]This isn't Anthy or anything, is it? >She wore a turtleneck, sweater, and black jeans--something >typical for the young woman. Yarun: However, she was tangled in a bizarre sentence structure. Xel: And said sentence structure strangled her to death. The end. Kumiko: [annoyed]That's my gag... Xel: [sticks his tongue out at her] Then get faster at it! > "About time you showed up, Rose," Oriel said. Yarun: [Oriel]You are aware the rooms upstairs rent by the hour... Xel: [Oriel] And you've NO idea what I paid for all these 'toys' you asked me to get... >"I took the liberty of >ordering the usual for you." Kumiko: [Oriel]Do you have any idea how hard it is to get French cooks to make a decent exploding curry? > "Why thank you," Rose intoned in gratitude. Nori-6: ...the author wrote in redundancy... >"I would have been here >earlier, but I had to run an errand for my employer." Xel: Wink wink, nudge nudge, know-what-I-mean? [nudges Kumiko] Kumiko: Unfortunately. [draws her belt dagger] Xel: [eyes the dagger] .... [coughs and inches farther from her in his seat, sweatdropping] > Oriel nodded, lifted a glass of wine to her lips, taking a brief sip. Kumiko: She choked on the missing conjunction and died. The end. Xel: [puts an arm around her shoulders] I like your style!^_^ Kumiko: [muttered, as she lifts his hand off and drops it back in his lap]I hope he doesn't have me mistaken for somebody else... Xel: [bats his eyelashes at her] Kumiko: -_-I know you're cute, but I've got a girlfriend. Xel: ..... [proceeds to bat his eyelashes at Yarun, who pretends not to notice] >"And just how is Chevalier?" Yarun: [Rose]Mr. Wayne...I mean, Stark...er, Templar...whoops, CHEVALIER is doing just fine. > "As well as can be expected, I suppose," Rose said in a vague, >disaffected manner. Xel: [pulls out a cleanser can] Yes folks, Rose Disaffectant will no doubt have you snoring from boredom in no time! And it's only the price of your soul! Order now! >"He's performing a task for other clientele at the >moment, Yarun: [laughing slightly]...they needed the...personal touch. >so I'm having to do a lot of personal errands for him. Yarun: [laughing harder][Oriel]But...hehehe...you'd do it for...heheh...for me anyway, right....hahaha...Rose, dear? >He can be so >demanding sometimes, you understand." Yarun: [laughing even harder][Rose]It's good to get...hahaha...away...hehe...from him... HEHE...I mean, stamina is...HAHAHAHA...one thing, but...[falls out of chair, laughing too hard to make much sound] Xel: [pokes him with a stick] Oh my, I think it was too much for him. Kumiko: Get up, you damn drama queen. It's not _that_ funny. Yarun: [standing up slowly, still laughing, his glass still in hand and full]Whatever do you mean? It's...hehe...worse than "The Price of Business", but completely unintentional. Xel: I assume this sort of thing happens often? [addressing Nori-6] Nori-6: Yes. Interesting, is it not? Xel: That's not exactly the word I was thinking of, but close enough! > The older woman nodded. "That I do, Rose, that I do. Kumiko: That'll do, Pig. >But as much as I >enjoy chatting with you, time presses me to be more expedient." Yarun: [Edward Dillinger]Walter, it's getting late, and I've got better things to do than sit here having religious discussions with you. >She leaned >forward and said, "My employers would like to contract your, um, 'agency', >for a special operation, one that requires a slight deft touch that your >employer has." Xel: [opens his mouth to say something, then changes his mind] Nah. Too easy. Yarun: If it's Akio, I'm out the airlock. > Rose gave a warm smile, though Oriel knew the girl well enough to know >the truth of that smile. Kumiko: Items that are used in battle are items. Yarun: To start push. Xel:The truth? You can't HANDLE the truth! >"And what does the French Intelligence Directorate >want with the world's best thief? Kumiko: About f**ing _time_ you told us what he was... Yarun: [hums the Saint theme] >Could it have something to do with the >Guerre du Monde?" Nori-6: World...War? Which one, pray tell? > Oriel sighed. "I should have known you'd figure it out--five years >we've worked together, and you never cease to amaze me, Rose." Kumiko: [Rose]Flattery will get you everywhere, cherie...^_~ Xel: [does a double-take] ... Wait, since when do you say anything that's not dark and violent? Kumiko: How goddamn one-dimensional do you think I am? Besides, Oriel IS practically drooling over her here... Xel: Yes, true. But still... [sighs and gives up, looking to Yarun] Have any spare wine, Princey? Yarun: [mock confused]Who? What was that name you used? Xel: [pauses and contemplates] .... [raises a finger then adds helpfully] The hentai formally known as Princey? Yarun: [rolling eyes]Cute. At any rate, you can't get squiffed...you haven't a proper brain for the alcohol to act on. Xel: [pouts] How cruel! Nori-6: I believe that was intended in a strictly literal sense. Xel: ....Oh. Yarun: And the name is Yarun, or Prince Yarunseto of House Toshitani if you must be formal. Xel: Can't I just call you 'Moofie'? Yarun: -_-...You win...[hands over a glass and a full bottle] Xel: ^_^ [accepts it happily] Moofiechan, if I get to drunk, will you be a dear and carry me to bed? [bats his eyelashes cutely] Yarun: [muttered]Can't you go hit on the pirate again? Kumiko: But you two are _so_ cute together! >) > "So, your government's still determined to hunt down every member of >that organization?" Yarun: [Oriel. outrageous French accent]Oui...in ze prroud tradition of Javert and Clouseau! Kumiko: OK...Just your normal unsubtly named terrorists. > "Rose, they blew up the Louvre, Yarun: [narrator]Just in case you missed it before, this is _France_. >killing 700 people and destroying a >third of the building, Xel: [scoffs] Only 700? Some terrorists! Nori-6: Not necessarily...this may simply be typical anime resilience in action. >several priceless statues and paintings, chief >amongst them the Mona Lisa. My daughter and granddaughter were among those >killed in the blast. The French government Yarun: Oh, and...this is FRANCE. Xel: [blinks, with mock confusion] Really?! Damn... this whole time I thought we were in Constantinople... >wants to see Guerre du Monde >brought to justice. I want them dead." Kumiko: [Rose]I feel your pain and all, but...what do you expect a _thief_ to do about that? [coughs it out]Idiot. > "I'm sorry to hear that, Oriel. You have my condolences. I know what >it's like to lose a loved one." Rose's voice was sincere and true, Kumiko: That's when you know the scam's a really good one. Xel: [pats her head] Ah, that's more like the Kumiko we all know and tolerate! Yarun: I'd say she's quite loved...what _does_ she do with the toasters? Xel: Saaa, that's so sweet! Pardon me. [leans over the back of the chair and retches, then sits back down again as if nothing happened] Kumiko: [muttering]It's not like I _try_ to be a girl magnet... >and when >Oriel's eyes looked into Rose's, there was no mistaking that the girl had >once been witness to something very terrible. Yarun: And yet she starred in another one... > "Thank you, Rose. I appreciate your caring." Kumiko: [Rose]And I appreciate your money. >Oriel bent down, reaching >into her purse and pulling out a sizable envelope, handing it to Rose. Xel: [Oriel] That should cover the room, and the 'toys'.... >"Well, as you may already know, the Guerres are now working on global plans. >In the past few days, every NATO capitol has been placed on a higher >security level, and some of the other nations, such as Russia, Australia, >and Japan, have also taken extra precautions. The Guerre feel that the time >to start their global agenda is soon...very soon. Kumiko: Well, great. Whenever I think "Utena", I think "espionage thriller." Xel: Does this meen we get to see Anthy in one of those slinky cliche female spy outfits, like a tight leather bodysuit that shows more cleavage than needed? [looks hopeful] Yarun: Lady Luck willing... > "As our current assessment goes, they are operating a local cell from >the Streissen Building in downtown Munich, Germany. We have reason to >believe that the Mondes are planning their latest terrorist attack from the >74th floor of that building--Munich is within striking distance of not only >France, but a German air force base, a Canadian air force base, and an >American army base. However, because of the delicate situation, German >security forces are hesitant to seize the building, and because this is NATO >territory, the Americans and British would hardly launch attacks on it. Yarun: [Austin Powers]Thank you, Mr. Exposition. Xel: I was hoping she'd pass out from lack of air... ah well. > "Allied satellite photos confirm that there is an enemy presence on the >74th floor of that building, but where on that floor is uncertain. Nori-6: How anyone could expect a satellite image to provide that information is incomprehensible. Xel: This it what we like to call a 'Special thinker'. All special thinkers belong in 'Special schools'. If you're able to find the author of this fanfic, please sedate them and ship them to a local Special school right away. Thank you. >Our >analysts think that it may be the entire floor that is occupied. We also >have reason to suspect that the pertinent data--maps, rosters, and the >like--is in a computer on that floor, as well as maps and such." Yarun: Or, perhaps, this is Utena Gear Solid? > Rose gave another of her beguiling grins. Kumiko: Oh, great, I should've brought sunglasses. >"And you want Chevalier to >sneak in, steal the data, and sneak right out, handing the data to you, >right?" Xel: Your mission, should you choose to accept it... > Oriel nodded in the affirmative. "Once the data has Nori-6: Have. Data is a plural. Xel [blinks] Really? But there's no... wait. [scratches his head] ... nevermind.O.o >been handed over to >us, it will be sent to NATO Headquarters in Belgium for further >investigation. But as for Chevalier, we will do everything we can to >minimize the threat to him. While he is attending to his mission, the >Americans will be staging a diversionary raid on the Guerre training camp in >Algeria." Kumiko: Suure...and the first place they'll pull people from is Munich. Military intelligence... Xel: Ah, the world's best oxymoron... >At this moment, the meal arrived, and the three entrenched >themselves in their meals. Yarun: We must hold the entree, or we might as well surrender the entire table! >Feasting on a small quiche, Xel: Don't forget! We're in _FRANCE_!!! >Oriel added, "Guerre >du Monde is looking at targets other than France, so we must be proactive in >our cessation of their activities." Yarun: [Rose]Oooh...I love it when you talk bureaucrat to me... > Delicately picking at her own meal of duck l'orange, Kumiko: _Somebody_ get Rob a new cookbook... >Rose sighed and >said, "This is going to be extremely dangerous for him." Yarun: [Austin Powers]Danger's my middle name, baby. Xel: [puts an arm around Kumiko's shoulders] Do I make you horny? Yeah baby, yeah! [Kumiko stands and tosses Xellos over several rows] Kumiko: No, but that was fun. Xel: [peeks up from behind a chair] I thought you might need to stretch a little. It was all in good will, I swear! >The woman took a >small calculator out of her back pocket, and tapped a few numbers into it. Kumiko: I hate to tell you this, lady, but only Prospector can make accounting look cool. Yarun: Aren't we forgetting Nabiki? >"Hmm. That's going to be very dangerous, indeed." > Oriel cleared her throat in a dainty cough, [All make assorted hacking noises] >then said, "Our government >is willing to pay Chevalier the sum of ten million, half of it up front." > Not batting an eye, Rose asked, "Euros?" Kumiko: [Rose]Republic credits are no good out here. Xel: That was random... > "Francs, actually," Oriel replied smoothly. "Overseas department >francs, from Nouvelle Caladonie." > Rose *tsk*ed. "I'm afraid it will have to be American dollars, or my >employer won't take the case." Yarun: INTENSE...NEGOTIATING...ACTION. Xel: [monotone] The suspense is killing me. > "Dollars?" Oriel arched a slim brow. "That's a bit much for this, >Rose." Yarun: [Rose]But I have to build Priss a new Motoslave every time...whoops, wrong series. > "So is asking Chevalier to walk into a deathtrap and wander out with >information that you have no proof is there." Kumiko: [Oriel]Don't you have any faith in cheap genre fiction? It'll be there. Xel: I wonder if we'll get a Deus ex Machinae in here anywhere. > "He would be doing the nation of France a great service," Hervé said, >speaking up for the first time. "Because of the current political >situation, Kumiko: Which is...what? Xel: Convenient. >no NATO country can afford to get involved with chasing terrorist >cells unless we have proof. We need that proof without leaving too big of a >mess, and that will take the best cat-burglar in the world to obtain it." Yarun: So...perhaps this "Chevalier" is Nanami in disguise? Kumiko: Lame... Xel: Badum-ching... > "And it would take a miracle to deal with the problem you place before >him. I'm sorry, but it remains to be seen that such an issue would have to >be dealt with by professional troops, not Chevalier." Kumiko: [Juri]There's no such thing as miracles. Yarun: Lovely idea, go in shooting under your country's flag. That's the perfect way to avoid an international incident. Xel: I rather like the idea! >Rose took a sip of >her wine. "What you're asking is a bit more than the usual request." Yarun: [Rose] Those types of 'special' tools are hard to find, you know... I'm afraid I'll have to increase my rates. Kumiko: Haven't you done about enough... > Oriel sighed. "Rose, I feel I must be frank. Xel: [Rose]But you were Frank last time, too. Kumiko: [grumbling]...of that... >Iolanthe was the finest >daughter anyone could have, and when she and little Adrienne died in the >blast, I felt so helpless. Kumiko:...before the might of the cliche. >They were my children, Rose--I know you have no >children yet, so you cannot understand what that means." For a rare moment, >Oriel's iron composure was shattered by a lone tear trailing down her cheek. Yarun: She should be careful not to rust. Xel: [stiffly, without moving the mouth] Oil can! Oiiill caaan! >"I retire from the agency next month after years of devoted service to my >nation. Yarun: Would anyone like to wager on her survival? Kumiko: Do I look like I was born yesterday? Xel: Ya know, that's like saying "I'm going home tomorrow, to be reunited with my lovely wife and two wonderful children, in our brand new dream home!" in a war movie. You're about to be riddled with bullets, or have a plane fall on you. >I have Iolanthe's youngest daughter Yvette living with me, but how >can I look her in the face and tell her that I failed to bring her mother >and sister's murderers to justice?" Kumiko: Well, your mouth moves, and words come out... >Oriel paused for a dramatic second >before adding, "I will throw in two million of my own money--in dollars--if >that's what it takes." Yarun: [Oriel]I'll also stand on my head and cluck like a chicken. Xel: [blinks] Well, that was random. > Rose reached over took Oriel's hand. "I see. So is this truly about >justice, or revenge?" > Hervé spoke for Oriel. "Justice, no matter what." Kumiko: >_<...Not Wufei again... > Rose nodded. "I see. In that case, Oriel, keep your millions and use >it for a college fund for Yvette. Yarun: What, planning to build her an on-campus replica of the Kiryuu house? >I shall talk to Chevalier about taking >the commission for ten million francs." > "But a minute ago you said he never would!" Kumiko: [Rose]Oh...I did, didn't I? Nice talking to you... > "This is a situation that requires justice. Yarun: Why am I having Tick flashbacks? >This is not a normal >situation, Yarun: And _who's_ saying this? After making a Rosebride of yourself for penance and having a sword sprout from your cleavage, it's all pretty ho-hum, isn't it? >and he wouldn't treat it as such. He's not French, Kumiko: Not French? You _sure_ this is an Utena fic? Xel: He'll probably die in the first battle to make up for it. Yarun: [Juri]I am _not_ French! >and while he >won't care for doing this for France, he would do it for a woman crying out >in help." > Oriel lost her composure again as she gasped, "What? He won't do it for >France, but he'll do it for justice?" Xel: [goes wide-eyed, then shrieks] PRINCE PHIL!! AAIIIEEEE!!! [dives behind his chair] Kumiko: Not Wufei again... Nori-6: MOVE 'ZIG'. FOR GREAT JUSTICE. > Rose said, "Yes. If you find that odd, let me explain, by way of a >little story: Kumiko: [whining] But I don' wanna go to bed yet...! > "Once upon a time, many years ago, there was a little princess who was >very sad, for her mother and father had died. Before the princess, appeared >a travelling prince on a white horse. He had a regal bearing and a kind >smile. Yarun: ...and here's our stock footage. Xel: [thoughtfully] Do you think this has any interesting 'glitches' like the Disney stuff does? > "The prince wrapped the princess in a rose-scented embrace and gently >wiped the tears from her eyes. 'Little one,' he said, 'growing up alone in >such deep sorrow-- Yarun: ...that you facial features have entirely disappeared... Xel: ....O_o >never lose that strength and nobility, even when you >become a young lady. I give this to you to remember this day. We will meet >again--this ring will lead you to me.' > "Perhaps the ring was an engagement ring. Perhaps. Kumiko: [professionally] This message has been brought to you by the Department of Redundancy Department. [Muttered]God, I miss Arche... Yarun: You saw her last not three days ago... Kumiko: Still... Xel: [cheerily] I could fill in for her, if you like! Kumiko: Sure...go over there and deal with those idiots for her. Xel: That might be rather fun, actually. >But the young >princess was so impressed by him, that she vowed to become a prince herself >one day. > "But was that really such a good idea?" Kumiko: Well, it made a damned good series... > At this point, Oriel was about to speak, when Rose took a breath and >continued. Yarun: [Oriel]Does she ever shut up? > "And many years later, the faux-Prince found herself in a battle she >never wanted, engaged to a person she didn't expect--betrothed to the Rose >Bride, the container of the Sword of Dios, Xel: Luckily, Anthy did not have a childproof cap. >which many duelists fought to >possess--both the sword and the Bride. Nonetheless, though she knew not why >she fought, the faux-Prince struggled on valiantly and victoriously. Yarun: Fight, Utena! For everlasting peace! Xel: [raises an eyebrow] .... >Eventually, she found a reason to fight: not for the Revolution of the >World, as so many other duelists had, but for the Freedom of the Bride, to >give that girl her own destiny...to free the Bride from the arcane slavery >she was in. > "Eventually, the faux-Prince met her true Prince, only to discover that >it was a lie, that the Prince was nothing more than a Prince of >Make-believe. Kumiko: Why not just SAY "Prince of Lies"? They call him Lucifer, for God's sake... >Though the faux-Prince later sacrificed herself to save the >Rose Bride, she derided herself as a faux-Prince, a sham, a fakery. But by >her actions, she proved to be truly what she aspired: a Prince amongst >Princes. Yarun: [Yakko Warner]Could somebody stop these people yelling "prince"? Clang! Thank you. > "One of those there was a contemporary of the faux-Prince, now a true >Prince. The Prince inspired that person with a sense of justice and >morality, a sense of heroism and honor. Xel: Heroism, blah blah, honor and justice, yadda yadda.... dead boring, isn't it? >That person swore to become a >knight, Chevalier, and to fight for all that would be right. For if a >Prince can sacrifice for all, so too, must a Knight, in the name of the >Prince. Xel: [pauses] ... [blinks] So, the prince has to be.. wait, no. The prince and... er... knight... in bed... with the candlestick in the lounge...? [looks confused] > "So in the end, the princess becoming a prince was not only a good idea, >it was the only thing that could have been done." Yarun: And what, precisely, does that have to do with Chevalier? Kumiko: Hell if I know. Xel: Sore wa himitsu desu?^_^ > As Rose quieted, Hervé, overcome by the awe of the story Xel: [audience]Awww... Yarun: [George of the Jungle narrator]That's "awe". A-w-e. Xel: Oooh... Yarun: That's better. >asked, "And >what was the fate of the rest?" Kumiko: The rest was forced into slave labor in Afghanistan, where they made little Utena plushies until the end of time, or till their hands fell off. The end. > Rose answered in a dreamy voice, Yarun: [Rose, stoned]This is some gooood shit. >"No one knows what happened to the >Prince, for she disappeared. Yarun: Well, the authorities can't find you if your "prince" aren't on file... Kumiko: That was bad. Xel: Well, that's what you get for not backing up all your '.prince' files. >The Prince of Make-believe and the other >duelists continued to strive for the power of Revolution, denying the >truth--that they would never have that power. Kumiko: Uh...Ending, anyone? The subtle revolution and all that? Nori-6: Does that statement not rather contradict the resolution of the series? Akio does not recognise his defeat, but the others no longer desire the power... Kumiko: I just said that, I think. Xel: [Grahf]Dost thou desire the power? >The Rose Bride and the >Chevalier left in search of the Prince, determined that they would be >reunited someday. Xel: I thought Chu-Chu went with her... so... is Chu-Chu Chevalier? Yarun: Perhaps...but then there will be a retcon and we'll discover that it was Dios in a Chu-Chu suit. Xel: ....Right. [rubs his temples] My head hurts. > "That was a decade ago, and they've never forgotten the Prince. Kumiko: Yeah, that pink hair is pretty memorable... Tessiri: [over speakers]It has taken you this long to realise this? Kumiko: Who asked you? >Though >they stopped actively searching years ago, they have never given up hope >that they will be reunited with their friend on some shining day." Yarun: What if it's raining? Xel: It wont be. Fanfic Luck counteracts that sort of thing. > Oriel gave a small smile. "I suppose you're the Rose Bride, then, >Rose?" Kumiko: [Rose]Whoa. How did you ever guess? > Rose gave a cheerful grin. Kumiko: She's happy. Better increase the dosage. Xel: [sings] The microwaves did something to our brains~! We need to take these pills to help us change~! Please let me take them, I don't want to be an idiot! Ritalin will make me smart, at least that's what my teacher said~... >"I was, once. I suppose someone else now is >the Rose Bride. Kumiko: Yeah...Akio thinks the Power of Dios'll just shift over to anybody. Right. >But yes, I am she who was protected by the Prince." Yarun: [Zordon]May the Prince protect you. >Rose >was about to say more, but there was a musical chime that suddenly sounded >from her watch. Looking at it, she said, "Well, I must be going. I have >personal affairs to attend to. Xel: [Rose]Things to see and people to do...wait, that's not quite right, is it? >I trust that you will make the usual >arrangements." > "Yes, of course. Thank you, Rose. I appreciate your assistance in >winning the talent of Chevalier." Yarun: [mechanical voice]Chevalier Talent acquired! > Rising from her seat, she replied, "No thanks is needed. The Chevalier >would thank you, in fact, for a chance to right such a terrible injustice." Xel: [shudders and holds his head in his hand] Oh dear lord, it's another Amelia Justice Freak in the making.... >Bidding her compatriots a farewell, she stepped out of the restaurant, into >the street Nori-6: ...tripping over an unnecessary comma... >as a gentle rain began to fall. Yarun: [singing]I only want to see you laughing in the purple rain... > Walking to where she parked her car, Kumiko: Probably hammerspace, since this is Paris... >Anthy Himemiya stared through the >rain of the Parisian sky and the tears that gently fell down her face. "Oh, >Utena," she whispered, "will I ever see you again?" Yarun: [monotone]What a surprise. >The only answer Anthy >received was the gentle patter of the rain as she climbed into her Renault >and sped off into the distance. Xel: Unfortunately, the road was very slippery, so she spun out of control and slammed into a tree, killing her instantly, the end. Can we go now? >@}>---`---,---- [Yarunseto hums the Tuxedo Kamen theme] > A few minutes later, she pulled up in front of her small home in the >Parisian suburb of Créteil. From her home she could see both the skyline of >Paris, and the equally stunning skyline of Disneyland Paris. Stepping out >of her car, she wasted no time in rushing inside the house, in order to get >ready for her newest caper. Yarun: As opposed to her old olives. > As she walked down the primary hallway of her home, as always, she >stared at the pictures of her world, whether real or imagined. Kumiko: Imagined pictures? Harder to steal, I guess. >Anthy >Himemiya, a girl with a mother from Monaco and a Japanese father. Her >mother, related to the royal family, which made her and her brother royalty. Xel:Which means they're royal pains in the arse! [rimshot from no where] >Her father, who she'd never known, who'd died shortly after her mother did, >leaving her in the care of her brother Dios. Nori-6: Does it not rather appear that Dios was in her care? >Dios, whose dark and twisted >nature made him become Akio, Kumiko: Dark and twisted nature? Funny, I thought it was something about seeing the mob use her for a pincushion. Xel: Nah, I'm sure he thought that was just too funny.... it's TV's fault he became Akio. Or government, or something. >forging the Rose Signet Code and all it stood >for. Yarun: And that would be...Choral pop-metal with semicoherent lyrics? > Of course their true natures were older than that, older than time upon >time itself, but the truth of it was that the magic that made her and her >brother who they were also made for a convenient covering of that, giving >them a normal existence while shielding a truth that was rather impossible >to comprehend. Yarun: Well, isn't that marvellously convenient? Xel: Fanfic Luck. It's always convenient. >Lies were, after all, much easier and less strange than the >truth. Kumiko: [Obi-Wan]The truth...from a certain point of view. Many things depend on one's point of view. >Let the world believe that she was as young as she appeared. It was >easier that way, anyway. Yarun: Youth secrets of the archetypes can be yours for a new low price! > She moved away from those frames, only to concentrate on one farther >away. Nestled at the end of the hall, it held a place of honor, being the >most important picture of all.... Kumiko: Kunihiko Ikuhara? > Tenjou Utena. The only person that truly cared about Anthy. Yarun: At least it's not the "best friend" dodge... >Sure, >Saionji and Miki had been in love with her at one time, but Xel: ...now had instead fallen for each other... Yarun: [sarcastic]Well, thank you for _that_ delightful image... Kumiko: [activating forceblade]Watch what you say about Miki. Xel: [hiding behind Yarun to use him as a shield] Now now, that's not very lady-like..! Kumiko: You want ladylike, ask him. He looks great in a dress.[points at Yarun] >only Utena had >gone the distance Yarun: [singing]I know every mile/Will be worth my while... >to free Anthy from the prison that was her own self. >Tenjou Utena, who disappeared while freeing Anthy despite Anthy's own >betrayal, and Utena's claim of counterbetrayal. Xel: And Anthy's claim of Utena's countercounterbetrayal.. and a counter to THAT counter betrayal... [continues on] >Tenjou Utena, a girl who >wanted to, and in the end, succeeded in becoming a Prince. It was Utena who >sacrificed herself for Anthy's sake ten years ago. Nori-6: There is nothing in the tea-and-cookies scene which requires any and all fanfiction to be set exactly ten years beyond it... >It was Utena who gave >Anthy the courage to smash her shell, becoming the chick to leave its egg. Yarun: However, her subsequent compulsion to smash every egg in sight made her quite the menace at the grocer's... > Anthy ran her hand along the picture of ten years ago. In it, both she >and Utena were still 14 (at least Utena was, at any rate), happy and >carefree Kumiko: Well, except for the little details like Anthy thinking she's a witch, or the way her brother used her body and soul. Piddly shit like that doesn't count, obviously. Xel: Of course not! What's a little underage sex between siblings? Yarun: My, that sounds familiar...Are you certain you haven't met Tessiri before? >_< >and not knowing of the dark days that would befall them later on. >Not knowing that Anthy would spend five desperate years running around the >world Yarun: [singing]Roam if you want to/Roam around the world... >trying to find her friend, the only person who really gave a damn >about her. Yarun: [Rhett Butler]Frankly, my dear, I do give a damn. Xel: [groans] Oh, that was just BAD... [covers his face] >During that time, she'd done some less than savory things, and >as a result, no one really knew that Anthy Himemiya was not only Rose, the >assistant of Chevalier, but Chevalier himself, the world's most notorious >cat burglar. Kumiko: [Catwoman]Life's a bitch, and now so am I. > Anthy wasn't sure when she became the less-than-ideal knight, Kumiko: Knowing this fic, she's less a dark knight than just dim. >but she >knew why she chose the name: if Utena had become a prince in order to save >the Rose Bride, Anthy would become a knight to quest and search for her >noble prince. Yarun: That, and she'd watched far too much of "The Saint". >Of course, real knights weren't notorious thieves, but then >again, the world was different than what Anthy Himemiya had first thought it >to be. Kumiko: Lots of random guilt and sex with your older brother, she means? Is it a BAD thing that it's different? Yarun: There was a decided lack of randomly appearing iced drinks in her current world... > Anthy wiped the tears from her blurry eyes. Kumiko: That could take a while. >She was 24 now (or so her >identification said), living far way from Japan and Ohtori Academy, far away >from the inane stupidity and warped honor of Yarun: Dragon Ball Z? Wait, that's inane stupidity and warped _time_. >the Rose Signet Codes and all >they stood for. In leaving on her own and moving into the world, Anthy had >developed her own sense of honor and code of morals, and that was where >things now stood. It didn't matter that Anthy's eventual path took her in a >direction she could never have expected: that of a roué, Yarun: France, people! FRANCE! Kumiko: Okay, I think we've milked that joke enough... >a lady-thief; Yarun: Stealing ladies? Wouldn't that be rather more Utena's bit? Xel: I was thinking Touga, myself. Kumiko: He's got nothing on her in the fangirl department... Xel: [blinks] Noted. >the >important part was that she was free to make that choice, Yarun: [singing]I will choose a path that's clear/I will choose free will... Xel: [To Kumiko] Is there a reason he sings so much, other than the obvious "flamingly gay" option? Kumiko: Like you can talk about being femme... Xel: [whines femininely] You're so MEAN, Kumichaaan! Yarun: A bit of wishful thinking, Xellos? >not a slave puppet >to someone who could have dictated such a decision to her. Kumiko: Well, other than Rob Barba. > Besides, Utena would tell her not to cry, that she was there for >her... Yarun: Why did the image of "Video Girl Utena" pop into my head? Xel: [blinks, staring at him] ... [opens his mouth to ask, then shakes his head] No, I won't even bother. >Anthy could almost hear the words in her mind. Kumiko: Then she realized it was just Professor Xavier screwing around again. >Kissing the picture, >she said, "Someday, together.... Someday I'll find you, Utena. I promise." Yarun: [singing]One way...Or another/I'm gonna find ya/I'm gonna getyagetyagetya... Xel: ....... [proceeds to gnaw on his head] NO MORE SINGING!! >Adjusting the picture, Anthy moved off into the hall. She had a few hours >to get her things packed and ready to stay a few days in Munich. > > "Anthy," a voice said as Anthy entered the kitchen, "did all go well for >your meeting today?" Yarun: [voice]Kogai! Kogai! Kogai! >Seated over by the table was a young girl, no older >than eight. She had blonde hair, Yarun: C-ko? >red eyes, Kumiko: Chibi-Priss? >and freckles. Xel: Jordan Kennedy? >To some degree, >she bore a resemblance to the duelist Juri, though there was clearly no >relation. Nori-6: She resembled Juri...except she did not? Kumiko: [SFAE Juri]I am _not_ French! >Sitting on the table itself was another acquaintance, this one >much older. He sat there, wolfing on butter cookies as though there was no >tomorrow. Yarun: [opens his mouth to sing, then stops and silently mouths a few words to Kumiko] Kumiko: [singing, horrendously]Tomorrow never dies... Xel: [twitches violently] .... [grasps Yarun's arm] I take it back.. you can sing... just don't let HER do it... Yarun: Thank you very much. >) >Stopping momentarily, the animal chirped a pleasant sounding "chu >chu," Kumiko: Translation--"Get out of my face, I'm eating here." >before continuing on its eating mission. > "Oh hello, Mireille, Chuchu. How are both of you today?" Kumiko: [Mireille]Painfully cute. Next question? > "Well, I had a quiet day at school, Yarun: ...then I took the cotton wool out of my ears. Xel: ...accidently pulling my brain with it, thus explaining my bubble-headed cheerfulness. >my teachers feel that I am doing >well, though they keep complaining that I wear a boy's uniform. Kumiko: [Mireille]Actually, that doesn't bother them too much...it's when I swear and spit on the floor that they get a little annoyed. >Is that the >proper thing to do?" she asked. Kumiko: [Mireille]I'm trying to be an individual just like you told me to! > Anthy smiled. "Normally, no. But for people such as us, yes. Xel: Now hurry up, or you'll be late for your Future Drag Kings of France meeting... >The >Prince rarely wore girls' clothing, Kumiko: ...and when she did, it meant some slimeball had her around his little finger. Yarun: That, or she'd dressed in a hurry and gotten the wrong outfit off the floor... >and in the end, everyone realized that >it wasn't her style. Kumiko: I think we can safely award a "duh" to this one. All except Nori-6: DUH! >I rarely wear girl's clothing anymore, for Yarun: I grew up and it doesn't fit anymore. Xel: But that's part of the fun! I thought anime girls were supposed to LIKE too-small clothing. [pauses, then looks at Kumiko] You of course, Miz Tomboy, don't count. Kumiko: [muttering]I'd hit him again, but he'd like it. >it is not >my way, either. As followers of the Way of the Prince, so you too must >follow the path." Yarun: There's a hundred-foot drop on either side. >After a second, Anthy added, "But only if you choose to." >Anthy had long swore that any bonds present would be ones of love and >loyalty, not a slavery of any sort--she would die before she allowed such. Nori-6: But has she not considered that her previous situation could be considered to be a slavery of love and loyalty? > Miri nodded in affirmation, then continued. "As for Chuchu, I can't say >I know what goes through his head." Kumiko: A hell of a lot of food, of course. >As if to ensure that, the monkey took >four of the cookies and ate them whole, seemingly changing his body shape >from swallowing them. Xel: And thus our point is proven. > Anthy softly giggled at Chuchu's antics. "Well, as to school, you must >keep up with your studies if you are to be my squire someday. Yarun: [Mireille]But...but...Robin doesn't have to go to school! No fair! Xel: [Mireille] Holy scribbles homework, Batman- er, Anthy! >I have faith >in you, Miri. I have faith that you will succeed. Yarun: [Anthy]You will win with the blinding brightness of your spirit, and all that Japanese rot...wait, you're French. You're in trouble. >But take care never to >blindly believe what others say, for they will lead you into a rose-scented >trap." Kumiko: [Mireille]Can't you just say "have fun at school" or "stay out of trouble" like all the other moms? > Mireille was puzzled. "When you say that, do you mean yourself as well, >Anthy?" Kumiko: [Mireille]Then how do I know I should believe you that I shouldn't blindly believe people? > Anthy sighed. "Yes it does. Though I will try to never lead you >astray, there may be times when I might be led astray myself--it has >happened before--and it will be up to you then to see through the illusion." Yarun: [Mireille]Who do you think I am? Nanami Jinnai? >Anthy bent down and kissed the girl on the forehead. "You will do fine, >Miri. Just never give up on your faith." Kumiko: Did she turn into a thief or a motivational speaker? Xel: I was thinking more of Jehovah's Witness, myself... > "So how did you meeting go?" Miri inquired once more. Yarun: ...Aside from Oriel trying to sleep with you, that is. That always happens. Xel: [Anthy] Oh, we had a great time, exchanging good hair stylists, great body-builder studios, fencing dojos- ...oh, you mean the whole thievery thing! Silly me. > "I will have to go to Munchen for a few days," Anthy replied. "The >government would like me to do something there in regards to...a problem >they're having." Kumiko: [Mireille]Heh...tell me another one. Who really wants you to steal what? > "Is it with terrorists?" Kumiko: [Mireille]First it's terrorists, then it's governments, then it's crimelords...don't you ever steal from anyone who _doesn't_ have an army? > Anthy gave her charge a puzzling look. "Where did you learn that?" Yarun: [Mireille]My friends from Planet Kashira told me! They know everything, if you can just understand them! > "I worry about you, Anthy," the girl replied sincerely. "I don't want >you to get hurt." Kumiko: [Miri, as cutely as possible]After all, you're my meal ticket! > "Don't worry. I won't." Yarun: Why not simply _say_ "nothing ironic will happen"? You won't be tempting fate any less... > "How long will you be gone?" > "I think about a week, in order to gauge their strengths before I go and >take that which the government so desires." Xel:All the good-looking secretaries... oh, wait, that's America, sorry. Yarun: Actually, I believe that is universal to officeholders everywhere... > "Are you leaving tonight?" the girl asked. "I hope not. I was hoping >that we could go to the movies." There was a hopeful light in her eyes, Yarun: Could you get that bloody light out of my eyes? I don't care if it's hopeful, it's blinding me! >but >there was also a sad certainty that Anthy would be leaving. > Anthy saw it, and remembered a time when she was like that as well, cut >and drifting. Kumiko: ...like a punctured life raft? Nori-6: I cannot discern what that phrase is intended to convey... >Certainly that was why she took this street urchin under her >wing and gave her a life. Anthy was an older sister figure to the former >street urchin, though she treated her far better than her role models: the >Kiryus, the Kaorus, and her own brother--she suppressed the shudder on that >one. If anything, she used her relationship with Utena as an example, at >that idea worked wonderfully. Yarun: It would be far too easy to make something very sick of that, but I won't, in the interests of my stomach... >Speaking softly, she said, "What movie is >it?" > "Um, _Star Wars, Episode III_. It just arrived in the theatres last >week," the girl replied. Xel: [Miri]This time, Lucas made a special deal with the EU...we're required to see it, on pain of death. > "What time does it start at?" > "At the Cinéma du Champs at 8 pm." > "Good. We have time to have a nice dinner at Planet Hollywood." Yarun: 0_0...Right outside of Paris, and they're going to Planet bloody Hollywood? That's simply _wrong_. I only pray there is no talking standee of Keanu Reeves. Kumiko: To hell with the cookbook...somebody buy Rob some _taste_. >At >the mention of that, the girl's eyes lit up like sparkling rubies. "I can >wait until tomorrow to go; it's important, but not so important that I can't >take time off to spend with you two." Kumiko: [Anthy]Besides, I'm no good to anybody as long as I'm seeing double... Nori-6: I believe Chu-Chu is included in her statement... Kumiko: Oh yeah... > Miri leapt forward, knocking over Anthy from the force of the hug. >"Oh, thank you, thank you, Anthy! I love you!" The pair hit the floor, >while Chuchu ignored them and continued to eat. [Xel chuckles, and whispers something in Yarunseto's ear. The prince turns decidedly greenish.] > Anthy groaned softly, then mussed Miri's hair. "Hmm...maybe I should >just start calling you 'Wakaba'." Kumiko: [Anthy]Wait...you don't look like an onion, you _smell_ like one. >Seeing the lack of comprehension in the >younger girl's eyes, Anthy said, "Never mind," even as she laughed at her >own joke. Yarun:[Freakazoid Villain] Come on people, laff with me, laff with meee! >@}>---`---,---- [The screen freezes, black except for on the ASCII art.] Kumiko: Looks like we're getting a break...let's get out of here. [All rise and file out.] TO BE CONTINUED The Mystery Science Theater 3000 concept and running jokes are property of Best Brains International and Joel Hodgson. Xellos[s] belongs to Hajime Kanzaka and SOFTX, and has been lovingly borrowed by Emiko-kun. Alielle belongs to Pioneer and AIC. The other characters used in this MSTing are my own, created for a (planned)manga-style comic, and belong to Fortuna Samizdat Productions. Shoujo Kakumei Utena is property of Be-Papas and Shogakukan. "L'Chevalier de la Malchance" belongs to Rob Barba and no offense is meant, just humourous C&C. DadyTengu can be reached at.... JChance4d4@prodigy.net My page: http://www.angelfire/com/anime3/dtengu Emiko-kun can be reached at.... cruentus@shadow.zzn.com Her page: http://www.stormpages.com/cruentus ________________________________________________________________________________________________ > Oriel sighed. "I should have known you'd figure it out--five years >we've worked together, and you never cease to amaze me, Rose."