The author of this MiSTing is: “Ya-chan” …the other, female one. E-mail: putti_plush@yahoo.com LJ: http://www.livejournal.com/users/putti_plush/ DISCLAIMER: MST3K & the related characters and ideas are owned and copyrighted by Best Brains Inc. All characters portrayed in this MiSTing except the Mads are REAL PEOPLE. As of such, they deserve our utmost respect, and this document is not intended to be harmful to them. They are represented here without their direct permission for purposes of entertainment only. The fanfiction “Creative Master” is owned by Kei. Attempting to contact her, I recieved a mailer daemon notice that I have saved as proof. If she has found this and does not with her work to be publicly MiSTed, I will be more than happy to make this work disappear. No offense is meant to the author. ~This was a MiSTing written for J-rock fans, as opposed to a MiSTing of a J-rock fanfic for MST3K fans. I've tried to make 90% of my riffs non J-rock dependent though, so as to make this MiSTing accessible.~ Extended disclaimers and info can be found at the end of the document. CAUTION CAUTION CAUTION CAUTION CAUTION This fanfic contains mature content that should only be read by persons eighteen (18) years or older. This fic luridly depicts REAL PEOPLE WHO ARE RELATED having sex. Lasciate ogne speranza voi ch’irantre. So now, are we all comfortable? Do we have a sugary food or beverage? Very well then let us continue for the second episode of… ~~~SPARKLY!!~~~ Mystery Vocalist Theater fnord Three Thousand ~Where there is no conspiracy.fnord~ The morning came harshly to all four men. Just fnord yesterday, each had been abducted from an ordinary life as a good Japanese citizen, whisked away from family and friends and now kept prisoner my two insane capitalist pigs intent on breaking their wills for personal fnord and financial gain. Their room was state of the art a technological marvel but devoid of fresh air and natural light; a beautiful but suffocating cocoon. The men were forced to spend most of their time either on a gigantic bed or in the lavish bathroom, and while they slept, their clothes, the last link they had to home, had been stolen off of them. They now lay vulnerable and naked at the mercy of the over-sexed foreign amerikanski girls who held them captive, their bodies still riddled with the metal hookups that would connect them to their torture device: the fanfic screen. Once inside of the screen’s VR system, they would be forced to live out whatever information was fed to them. Already, fnord one of them had fallen prey, his body and mind violated. But the men fought back! Their sense of Japanese solidarity and honor allowed them to band together for the good of all they knew and their devotion to home country and Emperor! Who were these four men, sterling examples of Japanese superiority to the world? Four rock stars, named Takarai “Hyde” Hideto, Murata Kirito, Masaki “Klaha” Haruna, and “Kyo.” They were young (well most of them…) fit, physically beautiful, possessed of unsurpassed fnord talent and intellect, and of course in the buff. A loud screeching awoke them with a start, and they all soon realized yet again that they were not at home. Ignoring anything else for the time being, they recognized the noise and turned to the screen. Upon it, three girls appeared. One was fit out like a perky schoolgirl, wearing an “I <3 Yaoi” t-shirt, the next two were both fnord gothic, but the chubbier one fnord paled in comparison to the regal middle figure who shone with elegance and pure beauty. “Wake up boys you have a visitor!” The dumpy goth declared. “I think you’ll all recognize who this is.” She presented the stately figure. The men all recognized who it was: not a woman, but the greatest of all Gothloli cross-dressers, Mana-sama. Mana-sama stared at them but Klaha with mid length fnord ruffled hair seemed to under stand him. “Mana-sama’s come to rescue me!?” Klaha cried joyfully. “Yes, lucky you. He’s promised to give us tons of Moi Meme fnord Moitie merchandise in return, the entire unreleased line! Aren’t you lucky you’re worth less than clothes? Anyway, we still need you for today’s soul-breaking, and we need to pet him all we like in the mean while. fnord So, off with you!!” The screen buzzed off and the men started to screw in their wires. “I can’t believe it, I’m going home!” Klaha enthused. “Congratulations, Masaki-san!” Kyo and Kirito gave him play punches feeling glad for him. Hyde moped sitting in his place on the bed between them. Klaha was at the end, to the right of Kyo, who was to the left of Hyde. Kirito sat fnord at the other end on the right of Hyde. “What’s wrong Takarai-san?” Klaha leaned forward and looked at Hyde. “Noone came to rescue me…” “We’ve only been gone a day! And Mana-sama’s magical. I’m sure we’ll ALL get rescued soon! Plus we probably all disappeared places where people wouldn’t be expecting us home fnord yet. I was at a club when I suddenly passed out.” “I was holding Megumi, watching her face as she fell asleep…” The room became very quiet. “Oh.”fnord The fic started. ~author’s necessary note before the fic starts: When reading this Online, there are many ?s dispersed throughout the text. If somehow the proper… quotation marks I assume… appear instead, some of the following jokes might not make any sense. However I’m pretty sure you’ll be seeing some strange random characters as per usual. Carry on.~~Also, raise your hand if you noticed the foreshadowing.~ > Creative Master {Kirito and Kohta are sitting on a bed in a room somewhat cluttered with old magazines and a guitar in the corner. The drapes of one large window are drawn shut, and the room is illuminated solely by one bedside lamp.} > ?Kohta?what?s wrong?? Kirito asked. Hyde: OH MY GOD, we’re seeing the fnords!! Klaha: HUH?? Kirito: Well done my literary brother! Fnord is a word that was invented for use in a book about conspiracy theories. It is a word interspersed within text that we have been trained not to notice seeing. However whenever we unconsciouosly see it, it causes anxiety. Newspapers etc have fnords everywhere, however, commercials are lacking in them thus causing us NOT to feel anxiety and of course feel good about what they’re selling. Kyo: This fic will be a perfect example of fnord: it causes large amounts of anxiety! [high fives Hyde] Klaha: fu-no-ru-do…? > Kohta shook his head in response, shrugging his shoulders lightly. Kirito: Wait… this is a Pierrot fic! > Kirito sighed. It was always such a chore to get things out of him, > especially when he was in a mood like this. Kirito: Yeah, I know, Mom was always like that. Wash the dishes! Clean your room! Take out the trash! Get things out of your brother! Fold the laundry! > ?Kohta, you can tell me anything. I?m your brother, remember?? > Kirito responded. Kyo [Vader]: Kohta, I am your brother. > Kohta looked up at him. Kirito: As much as I hate admitting this, Kohta’s actually taller than me. Hyde: Which is he? Younger older? Kirito: Three years younger. Hyde: Cool. Just thought it’d be good to know. > Remember? Of course I remember. It?s constantly plaguing my > thoughts. You?re my brother, nothing more, and it?s killing me, > Kohta thought to himself. Kyo: Youfnordre my brother… nevermore. Kirito: My brother’s name ain’t Lenore. Klaha: Come on we’ve got more fic in store! > ?Yeah. I know,? Kohta said, even though that wasn?t what he really wanted > to say. Klaha: He really wanted to be… a lumberjack! > ?Then tell me,? Kirito insisted. > ?Have you ever?? Kohta started, but stopped. Kirito: Fnord Have I ever what? Fnord > ?Have I ever what?? Kirito asked. Kirito:… Kyo: Dude you just caused a glitch in the Matrix! Hyde: There is no spoon. There is no Neo. Klaha: There is no evil fic keeping us hostage… Oh darn it didn’t work! > ?Have you ever wanted something so much, but no matter what, you knew it > would never be yours in the way that you needed it?? Kohta asked, > stumbling on his words. Kirito: Pick up your toys, she said! Look at what he should have been picking up instead; those words can be deadly! Hyde: Help. I’ve fallen, and I can’t get up. > Kirito nodded his head. ?Constantly. And for a very long time.? > A thought made its way into Kohta?s head. Could he be talking about me? Kyo: Uhh… I think I see where this fic is going… [turns to look at Kirito, who is staring calmly forward.] > ?What is it that you want?? Kirito asked, noticing Kohta?s spaced-out > look. Hyde: Kohta’s acceptance into the space program was a great honor to the Murata family, who were proud to be the parents of the first man on Mars. > Kohta didn?t hear him. Kyo: It was than damn Banana Phone song in his head again. Hyde: ring ring ring ring ring ring ring ring banana phone! Klaha: Gaah! Make it stop!! > ?It?s like the entire world is against us?like there is a law that says > we can?t be together because it?s wrong. Hyde [coughs]: Actually, yeah, there IS, if you mean in THAT way. Klaha: In other news, is there a law that says you two can’t talk when the camera’s on you? Kirito: Yes now shut up. [Hyde and Kyo exchange worried glances.] >I don?t understand what makes it wrong?if I love someone, I want to be > with them, no matter what,? Kohta said, his gaze drifting away from > Kirito. Klaha: awww what a sweet brotherly sentiment! Kyo [shakes head]: I hate to think about how you will soon be disillusioned yet again. > Kirito?s eyes saddened; he hated seeing his brother in pain. Hyde: It was those damn rhoids again!! Kirito: Kohta doesn’t have rhoids!! Kyo: Whoa whoa lighten up there… > ?So it?s a person?? Kyo: The thought of it being er… not a person… Yes yes let’s keep it a person PLEASE. Hyde [in English]: Animal Vegetable or Mineral? > Kohta nodded. > ?Male or female?? Kirito inquired, getting only a smirk in response. > ?Male, then,? Kirito said. ?Nothing wrong with that.? [Kirito mysteriously nodded] Kyo: Nothing wrong with it: the fangirls will go insane! > ?It?s not the sex of the person I?m worried about. It?s the relationship I > already have with them,? Kohta explained. Hyde: He’s already my mother's father's sister's cousin twice removed’s roommate, and what does that make us? Nothing! > ?What do you mean? Do you already have a good friendship with them?? > Kirito asked. > ?Among other things, yes,? Kohta answered. Klaha: We also own some beachside property in Andorra! Kyo: Really? I’ve got some in Switzerland! Hyde: Luxembourg really gets you the best prices. > ?Other things?? Kirito asked, half to Kohta and half to himself. > ?Yeah?? Kohta started, looking his brother dead in the eyes and > continuing, ?Our relationship is the only thing keeping me from pursuing > him.? Kirito: That and the restraining order. Kyo: long time no riff. Kirito: Just biding my time. > Kirito?s heart skipped a beat. Kirito: Damn my arrhythmia! Hyde: Heart murmur acting up again? > It almost sounded like Kohta was talking about him. Klaha: Either that or space squirrels. Horrible dichotomy that. Kohta, space squirrels. > ?Who are you talking about, Kohta?? he asked. Kirito: Okita Soshi. Meiji revolutionaries who died of tuberculosis were always Kohta’s favorite subject. Hyde: Dude. We did an opener and closer for Rurouni Kenshin! Klaha: I know, that’s so sweet; High Five!! [high fives were duly exchanged. Kirito grumbled.] > Kohta took a couple of steps towards Kirito. He was merely inches away from him now. Kirito: Since when did Japan switch away from the metric system? > He brushed the hair out of Kirito?s eyes and looked at him. ??No one,? > Kohta said, sighing and sitting down. > ?Kohta, please tell me. I have to know,? Kirito begged. Kyo: Okay fine, Miss Scarlet did it in the ballroom with the candlestick. > ?Why do you want to know so badly?? Kohta asked. Hyde: Because dammit, everyone wanted to know who the Balf-Blood prince was. > Kirito?s head spun with thoughts. Kirito: What is the velocity of a laden swallow? Hyde: Why did book six seem like a fanfic, anyway? Kyo: How big is Mana’s pp? Klaha: Where did I leave my house keys? Kirito: Will we ever be free from this horridly revealing fic? Hyde: What did that comment mean? Kyo: Does Klaha’s pp actually have hydraulics? Klaha: Will you all shut up so this gets over sooner? Kyo: Does it have spinners too? Klaha: Dammit stop talking about my penis!! > My own little brother is in love with me. [all cough] Kirito: you know something just occurred to me, why should I be schocked? Of course he’s in love with me, I’m in love with him. Kyo: You KNOW they mean, in THAT way. Kirito: urglemrnnfflkmn… Well even, say for instance we were both in love in that way, that still doesn’t mean we’d have to have sex next, right? Kyo: You’re in denial aren’t you? Hyde: Trying to stave off the inevitable by futilely hoping that a lurid sex scene will not ensue between you and yer otouto? Kirito: Can you really blame me? Kyo[sighing]: You knew from the start what was going to happen. We all did. Mocking surprise is just more fun. {Kirito goes back to grumbling and staring forward at him and his brother in the bed. The two figures have inched closer and are practically breathing down each others’ necks.} > And I?m not rejecting the idea. Maybe I?m jumping to conclusions. > ?Because if I?m right about who I think it is, then he feels the same way > and is just as scared as you are,? Kirito said, giving Kohta the same > stare-down he?d been given earlier. Kirito: Stare-downs incorporated, your stare-down providers for fifty years. > Kohta looked down. ?You?d never guess who it is. Not in a million years, > Kirito.? Kyo: coughit’syoucoughfnord. > Kirito walked over to Kohta and sat down beside him. He leaned over and > pop-kissed Kohta lightly on the lips, as he always did when something > bothered his little brother. Kyo: AWWWWWWWW. Hyde: That’s jist so cute! Klaha: Please say you actually do that; that was adorable! Kirito: …shut up. I know you’re mocking me. > Kohta closed his eyes and almost started to kiss Kirito back, but it > was already over. Kyo [gutturally]: DENIED. > ?Um?Kohta?? Kirito asked, noticing that Kohta was leaning forward, eyes > closed. Hyde [fic Kirito]: fnordYou look really stupid right now.fnord > ?It?s me, isn?t it?? > Kohta opened his eyes and lowered his head, but didn?t respond. > ?Kohta?just tell me. It?s okay if it?s me, I promise,? Kirito said, > putting a hand on Kohta?s back and rubbing it gently. > Kohta slowly lifted his head up, and Kirito saw that his eyes were > brimming with tears. > ?Kohta!? Kirito cried, drawing him into his arms and hugging him. > ?Please don?t cry. I hate seeing the person I love most in the world > cry.? Hyde: Minus the fnords, this is actually quite well written and sweet. Kyo: Two brothers are about to have sex. Hyde [turns green]: Oh… I forgot… > Kohta wiped his eyes. ?I?m the person you love most in the world?? > Kirito started to cry, too. Klaha: What’s with all this crying? These are men, not sissy women! Kyo: Welcome to yaoific. Leave your testosterone at the door. > ?Of course you are, Kohta,? he said, kissing him lightly as he had done > minutes before. Kohta knew it wouldn?t last and started to pull himself > away. Kirito put a hand on the back of his head and kept him there, > kissing him. Klaha: Oh my God he’s eating your otouto!! Hyde: Not quite yet actually. [Hyde high fives Kyo. Kirito makes a blurbling sound.] > Kohta opened his eyes, only to see that Kirito had shut his. He slid > his tongue out of his mouth and gently into Kirito?s. Kirito kissed him > back for a short while and pulled away. > ?Kohta?is it me? Kyo: Is it my breath? Hyde: It’s not you, it’s me. > Please?? Kirito whispered into Kohta?s ear. Hyde: Me fifth element, supreme being. Me protect you. > Kohta shuddered. Klaha: bbrr! It’s cold in there. > ?Yes, yes Kirito, it?s you,? he said, and kissed him again. > Kirito moaned into Kohta?s mouth, laying him down on the bed where they > were sitting. Hyde: Oh thank y’u fer finally letting us know that they are in fact sitting on that bed. Kyo: The scene description was just blowing my mind. > Kohta wrapped his arms around Kirito and hugged his body to him. He felt > Kirito?s hands snake around under his shirt and tear it off, causing his > flesh to jump. Kirito covered Kohta?s neck with bites and kisses, > eventually making his way down Kohta?s chest. > Kohta moaned. ?Kirito?will you?? he said, bringing his hips up to meet > Kirito?s groin. Kirito: Will I fnordfnord? I don’t know if I can do that… > ?With pleasure,? Kirito said, grinning. He slid Kohta?s pants off with > ease, doing the same to his own. [all peer closely at the scene] Hyde: Did any one else notice that previously they weren’t wearing anything on top? Kyo: I think it’s one of those magically appearing details. Doesn’t make much difference now though. > He looked down at Kohta, realizing what he was about to do. [Kirito murmurs something] Klaha: Huh, you want a Klondike bar? > My brother? Kirito thought. My own little brother. > Suddenly Kirito?s thoughts shifted, as if he had become a different > person. Kirito [sarcastic]: Now that’s an efficient porn trigger. Let’s just throw away characterization like that, the porn’s easier that way. [suddenly Kirito twitches and shudders.] Klaha: Murata-san are you okay? Kirito [smiling wide]: > fnordOh yes Masakifnord I am feeling quite > good.fnord Klaha: Oh good! > He saw Kohta beneath him, long legs around him, thrusting his hips > involuntarily with excitement and lust. Kyo [flinches]: GAAHH!! One conversation and he’s… bucking at the air? Huh??? Kirito: > fnordBut hefnords straddling me. Itfnords completely > understandable.fnord Kyo: The fnords are getting a little old now… > Kirito grinned. ?You?ll have to lube me up.? > Kohta sighed impatiently. ?It?s a waste of time!? [all scream] Kyo: DAMMIT, NO IT’S NOT!! hrgglzxxzxngx Hyde: Fer God’s sake… that has got to be the most horrendous pair of lines I’ve ever read… Hey y’all guess what? You get yer first penetration without no lube, it’s gonna hurt like a foocha!! Kirito: > fnordCome now, why deny my brother the joy of mounting me bare? > Itfnords not like Ifnordm a virgin in that areafnordfnord Kyo: Stoppit with the fnords! Klaha: Are you SURE you’re okay, Murata-san? Kirito: > fnordBetter than ever!fnord Klaha: Oh no …the fic’s got him!!! Kirito: > fnordWhatever do you mean, Masaki? Ifnordm just the same.fnord Kyo: It must be when the fic said Kirito’s mind changed! Those damn wires are brainwashing him! Someone do something. Hyde: HIIIII-keeba!! [Hyde goes all Shaolin brown belt on Real Kirito, who falls back unconscious and bloodies on the bed, sinking into the darkness of the room. A few moments uncomfortably pass while fic Kirito and Kohta are rubbing against each other.] > ?Close your eyes,? Kirito said. Kohta did as he was told, pleased by the > look on Kirito?s face. [With a groan, Kirito rises.] Hyde: HIIIII-KEE[Kyo bops him] Kirito: What’s going on? Kyo: The fic took over your brain. Kirito: What’d I miss? Kyo: Kohta’s got his legs wrapped around you, is bucking his hips frantically in the air, and has decided, despite your first misgivings, that he will do without lube when losing his anal virginity to you. Kirito: Ah. Very good then. Hyde: Hi-keeba? Kyo: I think he’s being sarcastic. Hyde: Okay. > Kirito slid a finger into Kohta?s mouth, who wrapped his tongue around it > immediately. Kirito pushed down on Kohta?s bottom lip, forcing him to > open his mouth wide. The corners of Kohta?s mouth lifted in a smile, and > Kirito seized his opportunity. He placed his hands on Kohta?s shoulders > and put a knee on either side of his head, shoving his erection into > Kohta?s mouth. All: … Hyde [in English]: Surprise fellacio, like ninja!! Klaha: huh? Hyde [back in Japanese]: Surprise fellacio, I never thought it was possible. Kyo: That has just blown my mind. And not in the good way. Kirito [blushing]: I’ve never thought of doing that… > Kohta?s eyes flew open in shock. He moaned and grabbed Kirito?s hips, > pulling him closer. Kirito gasped but backed away from Kohta, > pulling himself out of his mouth. Kohta?s mouth still hung open, his > eyes closed, clearly wanting more. Hyde: …Murata-san, you’re a ninja with mad forcible-fellacio skillz! Kirito: Now that you know, I’m afraid I must kill you. Kyo: Damn, Kohta’s a slut, isn’t he? Kirito [offended]: I’m sorry!?! Kyo: No no, Fic Kohta! > ?Roll over,? Kirito said. Kirito: Good boy! Now fetch my barf-bag, fetch the barf-bag, boy! Good boy! Oh who’s a good Kohta? You are, you are! > Kohta did, propping himself up on his elbows. Kirito teased Kohta?s > opening with the head of his cock, making Kohta push himself backwards. > ?Kirito, please!? Kohta begged. Kyo: Okay I’m sorry but Fic Kohta really is a dirty cock-loving whore. And all of a sudden too. Kirito: I ASSURE you, he isn’t like this, at all. > Kirito grabbed a hold of Kohta?s hips and pulled him back harshly, > impaling him. Hyde: None did Kohta know, but Kirito was the reincarnation of Vlad Tepes. > Kohta cried out, and Kirito thought he had said ?Onii? but he wasn?t sure. Kirito: Oh joy. Fangirl Japanese. Kyo: Sadly, the local Oni heard him instead, leading to the newspapers reporting the first homosexual incestuous ritual suicide. > He felt Kohta?s body tighten around him. > ?Kohta?? Kirito moaned. > ?Kirito?harder?? Kohta managed to say through gritted teeth. Kirito > gripped the headboard with both hands and slammed into Kohta as hard as > he could, scooting him forward with each thrust. Hyde: I can’t believe what I’m seeing. Normal physics dictates that Kohta should be shoved backwards with each thrust. > Kohta turned his head back and Kirito leaned down to kiss him, never > once losing rhythm. The kiss tasted of sweat, of tears, and of lust. > Kirito slowed his pace and laid down on top of Kohta as he came. Kyo: Slowed down? That’s a new way to orgasm. The calm, unenergetic, totally in control of your body, just lying down way. Kirito: I’m feeling just as excited as that orgasm. And I’m not feeling anything. Klaha: It’s so… delicate. Hyde: Well at least by lemon standards, it’ll all be over soon and we can walk out of this fresh hell. Klaha & Kirito: Amen to that. > ?Onii?? Kohta sighed. > Kirito kissed the back of his neck and carefully pulled himself out of > Kohta. Kyo: No orgasm for Kohta? > Kohta rolled over on his back and looked up at his brother. He wanted to > say something; anything, but he couldn?t find the words. Hyde: Words like ilk, defenestration, and btoom. > But he needn?t bother, as Kirito suddenly buried his face in Kohta?s > stomach, tongue tracing a line towards his cock. Kohta drew in a sharp > breath of air. Klaha: Air quality levels reach a new low as the air starts to exhibit signs of "sharpness". Air quality will now be measure by the keenness of the blade. > ?Kiri?? Kohta said, his breathing coming in short, shallow gasps. Kirito > looked up at him and smiled, preparing to take Kohta?s length into his> > mouth. Kirito: It’s… it’s starting again… Kyo: Aroooga aroooga! Danger, it’s a two-parter! > ?Wait!? Kohta said, sitting up, and a very shocked Kirito stared back at > him. ?Wait? Why?!? Kirito more demanded than asked. Kyo [fic Kirito]: Sully man, I need to suck you! How dare you deny me that? Die! Kirito: Second… sex… scene… > Kohta wrapped his arms around Kirito, pulling him back. ?Close your eyes, > ? he whispered. Klaha [turning to kyo, whispering]: Why are we whispering? Kyo [whispering]: I don’t know > Kirito hesitated, not used to receiving orders. Klaha: After receiving his holy orders, Kirito became a priest and was unable to continue in this fic. > ?Close your eyes,? Kohta repeated. Kirito obeyed. Kohta lay back down, > leaving Kirito still sitting. > ?Get on your knees,? Kohta instructed. Kirito didn?t hesitate this time, > and did as Kohta wanted. Kohta pulled Kirito back again, his cock > brushing Kirito?s opening briefly. Kirito jumped in surprise and Kohta > positioned himself, slowly entering Kirito. Kirito: GAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!! [Kirito collapses to the floor. Klaha winces in empathy, having felt the forces of the wires equaling whatever fic pain was portrayed before. All shift to gather around him on the giant mattress. Hyde maneuvers the elder brother’s head to cradle in his lap.] Klaha: will he be okay? Hyde: He don’t feel too bad. His breathing is regular; I think he’s jist passed out from the pain. You guys keep giving that fic hell! > Kirito let out a moan and pushed down on Kohta?s cock. Kohta started to > move in and out of Kirito, but stopped as he heard Kirito start to say > something. Kyo: Lovely. Talking during sex. The last time I want to have a meaningful conversation. > ?Wait,? Kirito said. > ??What?? Kohta asked. > ?Close your eyes,? Kirito said with a grin. He was doing the same thing > Kohta had done to him. Kohta closed his eyes, his hands moving to > Kirito?s body. Klaha: Oh yes he thinks he’s just SO clever. In the old days they sent boys like you out in the hall with buckets of water to hold in your hands and on your head! > ?No. Don?t move,? Kirito said sharply. Kohta let his arms fall back to > the bed. Hyde: So previously he was levitating them separate from his body? Daaang, Kirito you’re a ninja, and yer brother’s a telekinetic! [Kirito grumbles] > Kirito moved up and down on Kohta?s cock, slowly at first and gaining > speed. Klaha: Poor, poor barn animal. Kyo: In denial? Klaha: Yes, and enjoying it very much. > Kohta tried to grab Kirito again but was pushed away. > ?Don?t?? Kirito said. > ?Fuck that,? Kyo: Hak what? Hyde [joyously]; Hak hak hak!! Kyo: You really have fun with that word, don’t you? Hyde: Hak! > Kohta whispered, his hands finding Kirito?s chest and digging into it > with his nails. Klaha: The construction of the Kirito canal continued apace as the addition of the Kohta Co. crews finally broke ground. > Kirito grabbed Kohta?s hand and took a finger into his mouth. [Kirito growls.] > Kohta dug harder into Kirito?s chest with his free hand, feeling the > blood flow under his fingers. [kirito gasps and moans in pure pain as his fic self is marred.] Klaha: Gaah!! Squick factor!!! Hyde&Kyo: Mmm, blood. Klaha [scooches away]: You shorties are kinda messed up y’know that? Hyde&Kyo: Who you callin’ shorties!? > He licked a trail down Kirito?s back and felt him shiver. Kohta thrust > upward into Kirito, screaming his name as he came. Kyo: Oh, so Kohta’s gotta hava a lil o dat strawberry jelly to come? Hyde: At least he finally got to. I was worried before. …As much worry as I could muster for him in this fic. [Kirito blurbles] > Kirito lifted himself off of Kohta and lay down beside him. Kyo: And now Kirito doesn’t get an orgasm? Oh, I see, the uke doesn’t get any. How… Hyde: Either unrealistic or sadistic? Kyo: Straight up, my brother. [Kirito growls loudly, shaking a bit] > Kohta saw the blood that was dripping down Kirito?s chest. ?Onii?I made > you bleed,? he said. Klaha: Oh, NOW he notices it? What does he do have a blackout during sex? > Kirito grinned devilishly. ?I enjoyed it.? [Kirito lets out a guttural wail] Klaha: Are you alright? [Kirito grumbles] > Kohta kissed Kirito?s chest, licking the blood off as he did. Hyde: In a touching and shocking portrayal of realism, the author depicts the actual feeing habits of the vampire bat. Kirito: Heh. > He looked up at Kirito and smiled a bloody smile. Klaha: Ewwwwweewewewe. > Kirito kissed Kohta?s crimson lips, tasting his own blood. > ?Kirito?please tell me we?ll do this again,? Kohta said. Kirito: No. No way in hell do you get to scratch up my lovely body. > ?There?s no way in hell we wouldn?t,? Kirito answered. > ?I mean?really. I love you so much, and I love what we just did, and I?? > Kohta said, trailing off. > Kirito silenced him with a kiss. ?I love you too. Don?t worry; you?ll > always have me.? Kyo: Aww, the fic’s back in fluff mode. Kirito: Yeah, and I still want to strangle it. > ?Thank you,? Kohta said. > ?For what?? Kirito asked. > ?For staying on my ass and asking me what was wrong. Other wise this > might not have happened,? Kohta said, blushing. > ?That?s another thing,? Kirito replied. Hyde: I have to give them this, they used commas at the end of quotations correctly. [claps] Kirito: Who cares!? > ?What?? Kohta asked. > ?I?ll always stay on your ass, too,? Kirito said, grinning. [Hyde and Kyo laugh. Kirito is making a strange choking/growling sound.] Klaha: We haven’t seen such bad jokes since I gave them in the last fic! > OWARI Kirito: HRRRAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAGGHHHH!!! [Kirito goes ballistic, and starts to tear off his wires before the fic itself even ends.] Hyde: Careful there tiger… Klaha: Takarai-san, I think Kirito’s going insane again… > © Kei {A girl, the author fuzzily appears onscreen. Klaha looks on worriedly as Kirito assaults the others and rips out their cords, causing the picture to fluctuate and fizzle out. Klaha braves on.} “Errr… Yay, we finally get to see the author. Ummm… Oh, this fic is so great, she has to copywright it?” Klaha struggled to continue to make fun of the fic, feeling the small hands of Hyde and Kyo clinging to his bare arms. Kirito was making a mess of the room, tearing down the curtains over the cabana bed and running over to the kitchenette to destroy the pots pans, and electronic equipment, his torn wires still flying off his naked body. “Masaki-san, I think you can stop riffing now.” Kyo trembled a bit, observing Kirito’s angered rampage. “Hyde… Ummm… Hi-keeba time?” “Heck no,” Hyde whined. “No way I’m touching that.” Kirito pounded the microwave oven against the hard counter, chipping off marble. He let out a groaning wail, and swiveled his head to look at the three cowering men. His eyes were filled with madness and hate, his lustrous black hair wild and tangled. Bending down, he got into a running position, then sprinted off in a ramming line at the screen one fuist drawn back. As the bright white light of electricity filled the room, the last words anyone heard were the bellows of Kirito. “NONE SHALL KNOW!!” EPISODE LIST DESU! Ep1: “Did Mason think this was the pilot episode? “Hot Chocolate on a Cold night” by Esmeraude parts 1&2 Our MiSTing team is assembled captured by the overly rich fangirl Mads Mary & Sue. Hyde Kirito, Klaha and Kyo meet and explore their new environment. They subsequently learn to hate Mason, questions, and that creepy Dr. Takeuchi, and Kyo vows to make his next tattoo read “I Hakun LOVE Yu ~ Ki!!”