*SATELLITE OF LOVE* Silence. Then. . . "Brrrrrrrrrrr." The two humans and two robots sat on the bridge, looking at the floor. No one volunteered a word about what they had just seen. Except. . . "Brrrrrrrrrrr." The shuddering was involuntary. It was simply an automatic reaction to deal with the horror they had witnessed. In truth, the full effects of the fic were not being felt until now. Hence. . . "Brrrrrrrrrrr." The red light on top of the bridge consol began flashing. Everyone looked up. "Wonderful. Whip and Slip are calling. Should we. . . ?" "You get it." "I would if I have arms." "Oh. Right. Sorry, Tom." Reaching over, Soi tapped the button. *DEEP 13* "Ah, hello once again, Funny Farm," chuckled Dr. Forrester, "I see that you're already going into shell shock. That's nice. Oof! Frank, if you want to get out, you're going to have to push a little harder, you know! Well, I'd love to stay and chat with you about your impending insanity, but I'm going to need Frank here to help me load all these wonderful specimens of evil flora. So, I'll get back to you when you fall at my feet in grovelling, snivelling misery! Which should be right about. . . now! BWAAHAHAAHAHAH- Frank! Don't strangle my dandelion like that! It's got to eat too, you know!" *SATELLITE OF LOVE* As the alarms rang out once again, everyone snapped out of their Ranmafic-induced stupor long enough to run around crazily. All: OHHHHH, WE'VE GOT FANFIC SIGN!! Begin Original Lucky Charms Door Sequence. . . Door 6: *Pink Hearts!* Door 5: *Yellow Moons!* Door 4: *Orange Stars!* Door 3: *Green Clovers!* Door 2: *Blue Diamonds!* Door 1: *Purple Horseshoes!* Entering the theatre, Joel places Tom in the fourth seat and sits down in the third. Soi dodges past Crow and snags the second seat, relegating him to the first. > >~Ranma 1/2~ >~The Sometimes Self-Concious Nerima Rangers!~ Tom: Oy. First it was Power Rangers, then Ranma «. Now it's both! Soi (random Ranger): Let's bring them together! Wait, is my hair okay? Does this suit make me look fat? Crow: Soi, nothing could make you look fat. Soi: You're not getting my seat. > By J-Boogey (Not my real name. So please, no jokes.) All (Singing): We gotta Boogie! We gotta Boogie! Gotta Boogie on the screen and we can't shake it off! >Started 10/4/97 >Finished 10/4/97 Tom: Trashed 21/7/98 > Have you ever wondered what would happen if you Crow: Buttered a cat's back and threw it into the air? > crossed Ranma 1/2 and Power Rangers? Joel: If you double-crossed them? You'd be a dead man. > What's that, no?! Damn.....you ruined my whole premise. Crow: Ahhh, our good deed for today. > No matter! I'll just do it anyway! Soi: J, rule one: Listen to your public! > Wait, before you delete this faster than a nude picture of Janet Reno, Crow (turns an interesting shade of blue): Urk. . . > I must tell you this is a spoof. A parody. A J-O-K-E. Lighten up and > have a laugh. Tom: Soi, are all MSTers this goofy? Soi: The ones I know, yeah. >Send all comments > to WHolden535@AOL.COM. Now, let the spoof begin! Joel: And once again, AOL rears its ugly fanfic head. > Key Marks: Crow: St. Mark! Mark Calloway! The Deutsche Mark! > "something" = Speech Tom: Check your Platform Posture first. Joel: Huh? Tom: You weren't around for that one. > [whatever] = Thought Soi (forming her fingers into a "W"): Like, whatever. > {"Nihao!"} = Chinese > *doowop* = Sound FX All (singing): Doo, doo, do mop with me! > (Just me) = Notes > ::wizz:: = Action 'Bots: Ewwwwwww! >---------------------------------------------------------------------------- Crow: Hey, I see the caber toss has started. Good throw! > > It had been a pretty normal day in Nerima. Tom: Stuff happened. It was expected. The usual. > Even more normal than usual. There were no fights going on anywhere > in the city. Crow: Wha? Soi: That's not even remotely normal. Even for Ranma. >Then Cologne got bonked on the head by some wand that fell out of the sky. > Thinking she was dead, Joel: She went out and took a dirt nap. > people rejoiced. All (wave tiny flags): Yay. Tom: Parties were held. They all got drunk. The end. >They found out she was still alive, so they got depressed. Crow (Cologne): Why? Just because I raised prices to celebrate my own death? >She then absolved the arrangement between Shampoo and Ranma. People >rejoiced once again, All (wave tiny flags again): Yay. > especially Ranma, Mousse, Ukyou, Akane, and even Shampoo herself. Joel: So, pretty much the entire cast, huh? > Seemed she liked Mousse better after all. Soi: Well, she actually prefers. . . (catches herself) Never mind. >Then Cologne said she was going to take over the world and disappeared. Crow: Forever to live with Jimmy Hoffa. > And that's where our story begins.......... Tom: Look at all the periods! What suspense! > not much of a beginning huh? Joel: That's all right. Probably not much of a story, either. > >---------------------------------------------------------------------------- > It was a normal day at Furinkan High...... Tom: Stuff happened. . . oh, forget it! > I know I used this beginning before so stuff it already. All: BITE US! >Anyway, the daily pouncing of Kunou Crow: Shouldn't that read "pantsing"? All (cackle evilly) Soi (Kunou): ZOUNDS!! Return with my Levis, vile Saotome! > had already happened and classes were underway. Mousse and Shampoo > had joined Furinkan after Cologne left. Tom (Mousse): Gonna gets me a edukashun! > And right now, everybody was at their lockers. Joel (Mousse): How does one work this combination lock? Crow (Ukyou): Get your hand off my nose! >> Ranma: "So where exactly do you think Cologne is, Shampoo?" Tom: Wha? Script form? Where'd the prose go? Joel: Great. Pain ahead. Crow: Just be glad Shampoo isn't still with us. She'd go nuts from having to read this. Soi: She probably went nuts from *being* in it. >> Shampoo: Not know. Happy she left anyway." >> Mousse: "As am I. We can finally be together! Oh, how happy I am...." >> Shampoo: "Shampoo happy, too!" All (singing): Oh, Happy Day! When Cologne scrammed. . . >> Ranma: "I wonder where she is though....." >> Akane: "Don't dwell on it, Tom (Akane): Build your house on the rock, not on the sandy land. >> or else she'll probably come back!" >> Ukyou: "She's right. Cologne could just pop up." Crow: Just like a Pop-Tart >> Ranma: "Ha! And just what are the chances of that?" Soi: There goes the irony meter. > A suction cup arrow with a note attached thwocked onto his forehead. > He pulled it off and read the note. Joel (Ranma): "You're Dead." Hmmmmm. Others: Hmmmmm. >> Akane: "So what does it say?" Soi (cliched Ranma): It doesn't, you kawaiikune tomboy! Joel (cliched Akane): Ranma No Baka! *CRUNCH!* >> Ranma: "Be careful what you ask for.....you just might get it. Signed, Tom (Ranma): "Wes Craven"? The hell? >> The Author. Think this is bad?" >> Akane: "Oh yes....very...." Tom (Akane): We've only got three walls left now. >---------------------------------------------------------------------------- Crow: And construction continues over the summer in our nation's captial. > Somewhere in Winsconsin......Oh come on, it's the perfect place for > an secret evil hideout! Soi: Isn't that Montana? Joel: Yeah. If you believe everything you read in the newspapers. > Name one person you know who's even BEEN to Winsconsin! > Nobody? See?! Nightbreak: I have!! Joel: How'd you get in here? Nightbreak: Uh-oh. BYE! Joel: Wait! I hate it when they do that. > Anyway, Cologne was busy cackling to herself and speaking out of sync. Tom: And flubbing her lips with her fingers. >> Cologne: "I've seen the light! Crow (Cologne): Too bad it was just an eclipse. Now I'm blind for life! > The amazon village means nothing to controlling the world!" > Her mouth still moved a bit even after she finished speaking. Soi: Then, with one last choking breath, she expired. The end. > She pogoed around gathering items for a spell. Joel (Cologne): Now, to create the ultimate Pogoball! >> Cologne: "And I know just where I'll start. Soi (Cologne): At the beginning! OH-hohohohohohohohohoho! > Nerima! HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!! Now, to send my evil minions!" Crow: But first, the evil onions! > She waved her hands and a bunch of bad mimes appeared, Tom: Another song? Crow: Why not? We're on a roll. All (singing): She never told me she was a mime, oh no! > one doing that stupid box thing while yelling, "Look, I'm stuck in a box!" Tom: Brother, can you lair a mime? Joel: Tom, don't steal stuff from Spider Robinson. > Cologne blinked and vaporized the whole lot. All: (cough and try to wave away the steam.) >> Cologne: "That wasn't them. What was it again?" > She looked through a book. Crow: Transparent plot, obviously. >"Place your hands on your hips, Joel (book): If you can find them. > and when I dip you Crow: In honey garlic sauce again. > dip, we dip..... Whatever works." > So, she placed her hands on her hips and she did a little dip. Tom: Ah, symmetry! Is there anything sweeter? > At that moment, a bunch of Azusa clones popped in. All: AAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH! >"Oh yes! Now this is pure evil! All: AAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH! >Do you know what to do?" All the Azusa clones smiled...kawaiily All: AAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH! >and piped up, "No!" Cologne blinked and fell over. Joel (calming down): *CRACK!* There goes the hip. >Quickly standing up she yelled, "Go and destroy Nerima!" Soi (Cologne): If my great-granddaughter hasn't, already! Tom: Hey! We're back in prose. > She waved her hands and teleported them to Nerima. Tom: Too bad. I really liked those hands, too. >---------------------------------------------------------------------------- Joel: This is Captain Joel for Skywards Traffic. No accidents to report. Oh, wait. Pull up! Pull up! AHHHHH! *CRASH* > Ranma was busy zoning out a boring math class. Soi (Ranma): Let's see. . . high rises go here, townhouses here. Ah, parking lot over here. We'll just bribe City Council! >[Please! Let the torture stop!] All: Amen. > So he never noticed the teacher yelling at him. Crow (Ranma): Huh? Sorry, ma'am. I was still thinking about Cologne and that honey garlic sauce. > He DID notice five too many Azusas carrying off the teacher yelling, > "Oooh! Kawaii Paullette!" Tom: Now if we could only sic them on the Bloc Quebecois. >[Ok....now that was interesting.] Joel (Ranma): No more of Kasumi's home brewed sake for me! > Unfortunately for him, one of the Azusas noticed him. "Jean Luc! Come to > Azusa!" Tom (Picard): Number One, you're a ladies' man. Would you mind standing here for a second while I go and polish my head? Soi (Riker): Certainly, sir. *GLOMP* YIPE! >So he decided to beat it. Crow (dreamily): With a nice, *big* stick. >And after a quick little dance number, with special appearance by > Michael Jackson, he finally decided to run. Tom: With Michael in hot pursuit. > The last thing he heard was, "Kawaii..eh...eww.." Even Azusa wouldn't call > Michael Jackson kawaii. Soi (Asuza): What _are_ you? Tom (Michael): Pat. >---------------------------------------------------------------------------- Joel: Oh for. . . The telegraph's stuck again! > Ranma was making his way through the throngs of people Tom: Isn't that Happousai? Soi: Th_r_ongs, Tom. Not thongs. > (Yes, I used the word throngs. Fear me and my thesaurus!) Joel: Didn't those things eat T-Rexes for lunch? > and eventually made his way to his friends. "Hey guys, what the hell is > going on?" Crow (Shampoo): Two words: Fanfic. Trapped. > Akane, not missing a step, turned to him. Joel (Akane): Watch that loose plank a couple of steps back. >> Akane: "Isn't that out of character?" >> Ranma: "Oh....um....hey, what's happening?!?!" >> Akane: "This isn't a 70's show." Tom (director): CUT! Ranma, quit blowing your lines! Just be a cliche. >> Ranma: "Um....Yo Akane, did your cooking mutate Azusa or somethin'?" >> Akane pulled out All: PULL! > her mallet and smashed him into an alleyway. "That's better." > Genma and Soun reached out of that same alleyway Soi: Ah. Anything-Goes Secret Technique of Wall-blending. Already mastered by Ranma. > and dragged all four out of the street and away from the mob. Tom: Oh, the Carlotti Family will not be happy. . . >Ranma pried himself from the wall and staggered over to them. Soi: See? A veritable Master of Wall Techniques. >> Ranma: "Ow.....hey, do you two know what's going on?" Crow (Soun): Well, Genma's got a 956-824 lead on me in our Shogi tournament. >> Genma: "We were only told to get you five. We don't know what's going on." Joel (Genma): We were paid well for our silence. . . oops. >> Soun: "Yes, the master has asked for your presence..." >> Ranma: "What the hell does he want with us?!?!" Crow (Genma): Well, we was stockpiling bras and bikinis and dumping ice into a swimming pool, all while laughing gleefully. No idea what he wants. >> Soun: "We'll just have to see....." > Ryouga crashed through a wall at that moment. > >> Soun: "Ah yes, we were told to get you too, Ryouga." Tom (Soun): Get your coat, Ryouga. We are going for a little ride. . . >> Ryouga: "Um....me? For what?" >> Soun: "We shall see....." Joel (Ryouga): Um, what's with the gun? >---------------------------------------------------------------------------- > > After going to the outskirts of town, Soi: They bought Ranma-Chan a new dress. > dragging Ryouga in the right direction, they came to a cave. >> Soun: "Here we are." >> Akane: "Um....where is here?" Tom (Akane): And what's with that bright light and train whistling? > They were all blinded by a flash of light. When they could finally see, > they found themselves in.....well..... Joel: Amish country. > it was full of blinking lights and pretty buttons. Crow (Jerry Lawler): Campaign buttons! Tom: Who's going to get that? > >> Shampoo: "Ooooh.....pretty buttons...." Soi (Shampoo): Who I vote for? >> Happousai: "Ah, you have arrived!" Tom (Happousai): Try these on! You too, boys. > > Everybody looked up at Happousai, who seemed to be floating in some > kind of cylinder. All (chanting): Shoot him into space! Shoot him into space! Soi: Wait, won't that mean that he'd end up here? All (chanting): Leave him down there! Leave him down there! >> Ranma: "Can somebody finally tell me what is going on?!?!" >> Happousai: "Fine......Cologne has started to unleash her horrendous >> horde upon us and we need to fight back! Crow (Happousai): We need someone from her teenage years. Get Julius Caeser! > That is what you six are for?" Joel: Notice that he's not quite sure. > Six weird devices that looked like Tom: Popsicles. > Yin Yang symbols, attached with a note, appeared in front of them. >> Happousai: "Take these and read the note." > They all grabbed the strange things and read the note. Soi (note): WARNING! Do Not Read Upon Pain Of Death. Too Late. > >> Ukyou: "Hold these in front of you and say.....what's this?" Tom: Oh, how empowering! >> Ranma: "Um.....you're not serious are you?" >> Happousai: "Very." Crow: For the first time in his life. >> Ranma: "Are you alright? You haven't tried to glomp anybody yet." >> Happousai: "I'm......I'm stuck in this thing!" Joel (Happousai): Hey, make with the hickory smoke in here, huh? >> Ranma: "Good. You deserve it. So we're supposed to do something about >> this." >> Akane: "Looks like it." Soi (Ranma): I wouldn't have believed it if I hadn't seen it. Crow (Akane): Well, as you can see, it's right here on page two. >> Ryouga: "I think mine is wrong!" > > Ranma peeked at Ryouga's note and shook his head. Tom (Ranma): Nope. You _do_ have to do the hokey-pokey. > >> Ranma: "No it's not. But mine is!" >> Ryouga: "If mine's not wrong, then yours isn't either!" Joel (Ryouga): We've both won the Powerball lottery! >> Mousse: "Would you both shut up so we can do this?" >> Ranma and Ryouga: "Fine......" >> Ranma: "Do I have to say....." Tom (Ranma): Antidisestablishmentarianism? >> Everybody else: "YES!!" >> Ranma: ::grumbling:: "Alright......jeez this is stupid Soi: I couldn't agree more. > ...It's Morphing Time!" > Everybody took a stance and thrust their morphers All: SCHWING!! > in front of them. It's stock footage time...... Crow: Cue Sailor Moon Transformation Sequences. . . > >> Mousse: "White Duck Robe Zord Power!" >> Shampoo: "Purple Kitty Bonbori Zord Power!" Soi: This might make more sense if I knew something about Power Rangers. Crow: Just ask Tom. He's the Prince of Power Ranger fanboys. Tom: Shut up, Crow. Crow: Make me! >> Ryouga: ::mumbles:: "Black Piglet Umbrella Zord Power...." >> Ukyou: ::blinks:: "Blue Whale Spatula Zord Power?" Tom: She's a whale! Crow: Ukyou? Nah, actually she's quite slender. . . (begins drooling) Soi (Whips out soda syphon and sprays Crow with it): ECCHI! >> Akane: "Yellow Tiger Hammer Zord Power!" Joel: Yellow Tiger Hammer. . . I *like* the sound of that. Soi: If there's a Spring of Drowned Tiger, Akane gets my vote for it. Crow: Nah. Kasumi! All: Hmmmmmm. >> Ranma: ::sighs:: "Red Supermodel Bikini Zord Power........" > After a quick scene change, Tom: Shall we? Crow: Ah, why not? All (but Soi): SSSSSSCEENNNNEEEE CHANGGGGEEE! Soi: Wha? Tom: Don't ask. Too much pain. > everybody stood in their suits. Just think the original power rangers > or something. Gypsy (enters theater): Billy? All: No, Gypsy. Gypsy: Oh, dear. (leaves again) >> Ranma: "We.......look stupid." Crow: Wait. . . Ukyou, Shampoo, and Akane? In spandex? WooHOOOOOO! Soi (puts Crow in a headlock): I am WARNING you, mister. . . >> Ukyou: "Hear hear." >> Happousai: "You need to stop Cologne! Tom (Happousai): Here! Take this air freshener! > She's combined all of her troops into one giant Azusa!" Joel (Happousai): The saccharine alone is killing thousands! >> Ranma: "When? We were here for a couple of minutes, tops." >> Happousai: "Um....plot convenience?" Tom: How convenient. >> Ranma: "..........good enough." >> Mousse: "So what exactly are we supposed to do?" Soi (Happousai): Did I mention that you have to stop Cologne? >> Happousai: "You have to call upon your zords!" >> Ranma: "Our what?" Crow (Happousai): That was the technical term. In plain English, just act goofy. >Happousai: "It'll come to you. Just think hard. Now get out of here!" Tom: Rassa-frackin' kids! > >---------------------------------------------------------------------------- All (singing): Following the leader, the leader, the leader! > > Our heroic (yet kind of idiotic) rangers stood in an open field Joel: Making circles to scare the bejeesus out of the farmer. > looking at the gigantic Azusa rampaging through the city. Tom: And engaging in indiscriminant hugging. > A chorus was singing "Go Nerima Rangers!", and for the life of them, Soi: They couldn't stay on key. > they couldn't find where it was coming from. Crow (Shampoo): Mousse, is that stereo system in robe or you just happy to see Shampoo in spandex? Soi (raising her index finger): HAKUJIN RAIKO!! (Lighting leaps from her fingertips and zaps Crow.) Crow (burned): Mind if I smoke? *THUD* Soi: Ah, that's better. >> Ranma: "Ok, so now what?" >> Akane: "You heard Happousai! We need to call upon our zords!" >> Ukyou: "And we do that how?" >> Akane: "Well..." ::whispers to Ranma:: Tom (Akane): First, get a cat and skin it. Shampoo should do nicely. >> Ranma: "What? Oh fine......" > > Everybody started doing some weird poses. Joel (Ryouga): I'm ready for my closeup, Akane. > Nobody knew why exactly, but everytime they tried to do something they > went into a weird pose. Tom (Ukyou): Hey, someone want to help me unwrap my legs from my neck? >> Ranma: "We need Nerima Zord power...." >> Everybody: "Now!" Soi (Zords): Yeah, do what you want, but we're coming out when we're darn good and ready, NYAH! > The skies darkened and started to thunder. And then when Kunou was > done thrashing an underclassman, Joel: Ah, the Blue Thunder of Furinkan. . . *CRUNCH!* Tom: Shameless fanfic moment # 1. Soi: Mmmmmm, Kunou-sama. . . . (swoons and falls out of her seat.) Tom (staring at her): Oh, okay. > the zords finally came out. > > A Black Piglet zord, A Purple Cat zord, Joel (Ranma): C-cc-c-ccaaaattt! (Joel gets up and performs a creditable Tokyo shuffle around the theatre.) > a White Duck zord, A Yellow Tiger zord, A Blue Whale zord, and a bikini > clad girl zord that looked remarkably like the female Ranma came into town. Crow (recovering): How much do you want to bet there's a Drooling Kunou Zord attached to its leg? >> Akane: "Um, Ranma?" >> Ranma: "Yeah?" >> Akane: "Why aren't you freaking out from the giant cat zord?" >> Ranma: "The suits, I got over it.....I don't know! Joel (Ranma): The author was too lazy to think of something! That's it! > I'm not about to complain! Now let's do this!" > The chorus started up again, All (singing): Shoo-be-doo-bop, bop, bop! > "Go Nerima Rangers!. Ranma thought to himself, [I have got to find out >where those guys are.....] Tom (Ranma): I wonder if they need a good soprano? > Everybody jumped into their respective zords and turned on the PA system. Soi (also recovering): Attention shoppers, take advantage of our super-spandex sale on the main floor. >> Ukyou: "What in the hell am I doing with a whale?!?!" Tom (Mousse): You're engaged to one, aren't you? >> Ryouga: "You think yours is bad? What about a black pig?!!?" >> Ranma: "It suits you well, P-Chan." Joel (Akane): That reminds me, has anyone seen P-Chan? I'm worried about him! >> Ryouga: "WHO ARE YOU CALLING P-CHAN!! As soon as I figure out >> the weapons, you're dead!" Tom: Joel, permission to fire the chicken cannon again? Joel: Why not? (Everyone gets up and drags the chicken cannon out of the back.) Tom: Our target once again, the author of this fic, J-Boogie. (The drumbeats start up.) Soi: Our ammunition tonight: A straitjacket (Insane Fanfiction Theatre) Animal fur (Oscar and company) Some lemons (All those hentaifics) Mallet slivers (In honor of Akane) and, of course, lumpy potatoes (For all of Ryan's lumps) Soi: And. . . when ready, Crow: All: FIRE! *KAAAABOOOOOMMMM!* (Once again, all the ammunition slams into the theatre screen and slides to the floor, having done no damage.) >> Ranma: "Bring it on, Baco-Bits!" >> Mousse and Akane: "Would you two shut up!" Tom (Ranma & Ryouga): Bite us! >> Akane: "Now, Ranma, you know what you have to do now." Crow (Akane): Ravish me now! Soi: Crow. . . Crow: Once was enough, thank you. >> Ranma: "Why am *I* always starting these things?!?!" >> Mousse: "Because we all drew straws." >> Ranma: "I didn't draw straws." >> Shampoo: "That because you lost. Joel: Anyone else understand that? Others: Nope. > Now say it." >> Ranma: "Fine! Tom (Ranma): Kunou-senpai, I will allow you to date me! > We need....I really, really hate this....We need Supreme Ultra Megazord > power, now!" All: MORE POWER!! ARGARGARGARGH! > The chorus started singing again. "Go Nerima..." >> Ranma: "And could you guys sing something different?!?!" All (Chorus): We know a song that gets on everybody's nerves. . . > So, the chorus started singing, Soi: Everyone ready? All (in four part harmony): There's a light coming from the window, and it shines down on the street. There's a guy standing on the corner, singing that good ol' harmony. . . Tom: Another cookie to anyone who knows that song. >"We are strong, we are right....." Crow (chorus member): Wait, I'm weak and left-handed and I'm proud of it! > as each zord transformed into a different part of the huge robot. Tom: Huuuuggge Head! > Finally, after some more stock footage that will later be clipped to make > the show shorter, Joel: In order to satisfy the whim of Evil Overlord Haim Saban. > the Supreme Ultra Megazord stood tall and proud. >Looked like the Jusenkyou Guide, down to the green jacket and cap. Crow: Let's see. . . yellow tiger, blue whale, others. . . close enough, I guess. > And so the battle began! Well, not really a battle. Joel: More of a tickle-fight. > Just Azusa and the Megazord picking up buildings and tossing them at each > other. Soi (Super Dave Osborne): Ow! Oo! Ee! Not the hardware store! >Then, when they realized they were supposed to be SAVING the city, Crow (Ranma): You mean that Ctrl-Alt-Del doesn't save anything? D'oh! > they started attacking her directly. One hit later and she vanished > in a poof of smoke. Tom: David Copperfield, eat your heart out. > >Ranma: "What the hell was that?!? We hit her once and she died?!?!" Soi: Must've been a hemophiliac. >> Mousse: "I think the show was running long." >> Ranma: "Great.....can we get out of this thing now?" Crow (Ranma): All this spandex is giving me a wedgie! >---------------------------------------------------------------------------- Soi (singing): The dots go marching one by one, hurrah hurrah! > > Back at the command center, the rangers stood in front of Happousai. Tom (Happousai): *Click* Okay, one more picture in spandex, ladies! > >> Ranma: "Well, we did it! We saved the city and stopped Cologne!" >> Happousai: "You call wiping out several square miles saving the city?" Joel (Ranma): Hey, we're just sticking to standard Power Ranger scripts! Sue us! Soi (Happousai): That's just what I'm afraid of. >> Ranma: "Um.....at least it all didn't get destroyed." Crow (Shampoo): Shopping malls still standing! Aiya! >> Akane: "So, that's it right?" >> Happousai: "Oh no! You have about five or six more seasons to go! Soi (Happousai): We added some new ones! "Goven", which comes between Fall and Winter, and "Ridan" for between Spring and Summer > And new powers! And new zords! And cast changes! And....." Tom: Two goofs with bad theme music who'll steal the whole show from you! > Everybody was lying on the floor twitching as Happousai started ranting > about toy sales and movie royalties. Joel (everyone): Ohhhh, we're going to be rich. . . (pretends to faint) >---------------------------------------------------------------------------- Crow: Cut here. Return top portion for full refund of your sanity. > >And that my friends, ends this sad little fic. Soi (sniffles): It was _so_ sad. I almost feel sorry for the little fic! >Remember, joke. It's not to be taken seriously. Tom: We won't if you won't. Well, it's obvious you won't. . . >Send all comments to WHolden535@AOL.COM. Until next time, see ya! Crow: Not if we *see* you first! > ***** Tom: Five stars, my speckled bubbledome! Joel: Save it, Tom. Let's scram, guys. He picks Tom up and passes him over to Soi, who leaves the theatre. Crow follows the three of them out. *SATELLITE OF LOVE, 2300 HOURS* Soi slapped her hip, where the fanfic switch was clipped. "And once again, the genius of the Anime world shows through," she chuckled, "So, what did you guys think of tonight's selection?" "Cheesy," Tom offered. "Corny," Crow seconded. "Hammy," Joel tossed in. "Hey, is anyone else getting hungry?" "Yeah, now that you mention it . . ." They all looked at each other and grinned. "Midnight Refrigerator Raid!" they chorused. As they began to make a mad dash for the kitchen, Joel slapped his forehead. "Whoops! Nearly forgot to throw it in Dr. F.'s face that we're still alive! One second." Leaning over, he tapped the Mads button. *DEEP 13* Dr. Forrester looked up from trying to herd the mobile crabgrass out the doors of the laboratory. "Oh, dear. Joel, you're still putrifyingly sane, are you? Well, we're just going to have to do something about that next time. Oh, and don't get too comfortable while we're gone. If I lose at the show, I'm going to be in a bad mood! Push the button, Frank!" *BZZZZZZT!* "Frank, when we're finished loading, go and get the weed killer! It's time to pay our competitors a little visit! ======================================================== "Bear with me while I speak, and after I have spoken, mock on." Job 21:3, NIV ======================================================== Whew! The Master-MSTer Triple Feature is now done! Thank God. And I do mean that. I thank Him that I'm done it! Well, no rest for the writer. Now to finish a funeral. . . As well, thank you to Best Brains Inc. for having the compassion not to drop a rock on everybody's hard work out in the Internet MSTing world. Very much appreciated. Comments, criticisms and such can be sent to cadz0001@algonquinc.on.ca. Nightbreak MSTings: 1- 10: "Ranger Moon" saga (Power Ranger/ Sailor Moon crossover) 11: "Ay-yi-yi" (Power Ranger Short) 12-14: "I Will Remember You" (Sailor Moon Self-Insertion) Collaboration with Blazej Szpakowicz. 15: "Sailor Moon: The Ultimate Evil" (Disney/SM crossover) 16: "Surprises All Around 1" (Samantha Jones/Tenchi Muyou) 17: "Master-MSTer Triple Feature" (MSTers' Fics) http://www.geocities.com/Area51/Rampart/3552/mst.html Non-MSTing related: Club Anipke series, parts 1-7 http://www.geocities.com/Area51/Rampart/3552/fics.html