Mystery Science Theater 3000 presents: Sailor Moon and the Sailor Scouts Meet Mxyzptlk, Mr. Mxyzptlk. (Try saying _that_ three times fast) by Eric J. Schepers circa August, 1998 [XXX, SM, XOVER] Original Author: Darren Shivo Disclaimer: Nothing in this MiSTing belongs to me, especially the fanfiction being MiSTed. Darren, if you're reading this, you can mst my work if you want, I won't mind. Also, I'm going to try and post this on Shinji's Vault of Anime MiSTings. My thanks go out to the WS#9 diblist, Darren Shivo of course, and Best Brains for creating the perfect revenge on bad fanfiction. And awaaaaaayyyyy we go! Mike snored as he rested up for the next experiment. It had been a particularly trying day on the Satellite of Love. Dr. F sent three Oscarfics in a row, Tom and Crow had been bickering about something or other as usual, and then to top it all off, they had a cameo by Gonterman. All of these events of the day combined gave Mike some rather exceptional nightmares... A thin, spindly man with a conical hat and tattered robes walks slowly across the screen followed by a suitcase with thousands of little feet sticking out from under it. Stitched on the front of the hat is the word 'Wizzard'. The man stops in midstep, turns to face the camera and trys to say something witty, but before he can begin* reality rips down the middle and the dream changes....... [*Since this isn't a Discworld novel, let's just pretend that didn't happen, ok?] “Wake up, stupid!” Mike finds himself looking up at a 14-year-old red head. “Ano....... er, excuse me, but what the hell is going on?” For a second he had almost lapsed into Japanese. The odd part about that was he didn't have the faintest idea how to speak the language. “Get up, you're going to make me late for school again!” Asuka yelled at him (in English, no less) as he stared at her with a blank expression. After a few seconds of that she reached full exasperation and whacked him with her school bag. Stars went nova around Mike as he faded out of this reality, treated to a crash course in German curses.... And into another one. He ran down an alley way, then stopped and turned on a dime. He knew she was directly behind him and managed to squeeze out some more speed from his already tired muscles. Then, directly ahead of him, she appeared. Mike covered his face with his hands as he slid to a stop and said, "Wait, it wasn't me, I can explain!" Lum looked him in the face as tears welled up in her eyes then said, “Dahling no BAKA!” as she fried him with a blast of electricity. A few seconds later he passed out yet again............. “Here he his folks! Your new AAA champeen, Michael J. Nelson!!!” The Robo-Ref held up Mike's arm as David Kintobor was dragged, broken and bloody, from the ring. Overcome with emotion, the crowd began chanting, “Mike! Mike! Mike!.....” “............Mike!” Mike woke up with a start, and nearly fell out of his bunk and onto Crow. “Oww!!! Come on, Mike! The Mad's are calling!” Crow yelled as he got out from under Mike and tried to help him to his feet. “Ok, ok, I'm up. Uh, Crow?” “Yeah, what?” “This isn't a dream, is it?” Crow just stared at Mike as if he had lost his mind. “Nevermind......” Crow and Mike made it to the bridge; just as Dr. F finished showing Tom, Gypsy, Magic Voice, and Cambot his vacation slides. “And here's the one where I buried Frank in the sand!” Dr. F informed them gleefully as he showed off his slide. It showed him wearing a pair of lime green swim trunks and standing atop a rather large pile of sand with a pair of feet sticking out. Tom glared (or tried to) at Mike and Crow and whispered, “Do you have any idea how many of these things he has?!” Crow whispered back, “Sorry, I had to wake up the human didn't I?” “Hey!” “Sorry, Mike,” The bots chorused for what seemed to be the millionth time. Dr. Clayton Forrester watched this display with professional indifference then interrupted them by saying, “Glad you could join us, Nelson. I trust you slept well?” Mike gazed at the hexfield and shrugged. “It was all right.” Dr. F's face broke into an evil grin as he said, “Good. I want you well rested for today's experiment, but before we do that, there's the little matter of our invention exchange. I'll go first. You know that feeling you get when you're listening to your favorite tune on the radio? My invention produces the exact opposite of that great feeling. Frank!” Frank walked into the room wearing a pair of head phones. He appeared to be 'gettin' jiggy wit' it'. “With a push of a button, that great feeling of euphoria is replaced by one of revulsion!” Dr. F ranted as he pushed a button on Frank's walk man. Frank's happy, joyful face melted into one of pure disgust and hatred. Mike was eager to point out the apparent flaw in Dr. F's invention as he said, “But what if they stop listening?” Dr. F smiled as he replied, “I've already thought of that! Not only does it make them hate the song, it also makes them want to finish hearing it!! I call it the Hanson Device. What do you think of that, Melton?!” “You sadistic little.......!” Tom trailed off as a feeling of dread came over him. “Uh, you're not planning on using that on us are you?” Crow asked with a tinge of dread. “Of course not! I wouldn't dream of changing the experiment now, after all the work I put in it!” Dr. F yelled as Frank began pounding his head against the wall. “Besides, the fanfic I have lined up for you today is _much_ worse..." A mixed sigh of relief went up from the group at that. Then Mike got back to business. He pulled a flat, square panel out of his multi-pocketed jumpsuit and placed it on the console. “Our invention does what every fanfic reader has wanted to do to really bad self-insertion fanfics.” Tom spoke up and said. “It throws them away?” “No, it automatically rewrites the story as it's being read. It uses a special chip that targets the character with the most ego and automatically rewrites the story to humiliate them. For example, Pat Lee used a plot contrivance to disqualify Kodachi from the tournament; this device makes his plan backfire. Now, instead of him tying with Ranma, he gets killed in his first match!” “Preferably with a gymnastics pin shoved up his---MRPHMM!” Crow mumbled as Mike held his beak shut. Dr. F stared at the device with feigned interest. “That's pretty good Nelson. What do you call it?” Mike smiled as he said, “I call it the Dose of Humility or D'OH for short.” “Been watching The Simpsons have we?” Dr. F said as he thought of the implications of this invention. Why, it would take out his most potent weapons of all, and he just couldn't allow Mike's little toy destroy the ones he did have, so he pressed a button on his console. Laser beams shoot from concealed positions on the SOL bridge and strike the D'OH, which explodes in a flash of light that closely resembles a certain bot's head exploding. Mike coughs as the smoke begins to clear and faces the hexfield as Dr. F began to cackle with glee. “Shoulda known he wouldn't let you get away with that Mike,” Crow coughed as he waved smoke away from his beak. “Yeah, but don't feel bad. It never worked for the other guy either,” Tom said, as he tried to cheer Mike up. “Yes, it was a good try Nelson. To bad you didn't make a lemon version! Your experiment today is a stinker of a Sailor Moon lemon, by the enigmatic Darren Shivo! Frank! Get today's fanfic!” Dr. F commanded. Frank just looked at him with fear in his eyes as he continued listening to the music. Dr. F sighed as he hit a button on the Walkman and released Frank from his personal hell. Mike looked at Tom and Crow and asked, "So that type of invention's been done before?" Crow nodded and said, "Uh yeah, but....you picked a really nice design for it!" "Really? I was going for a kind of modern look..." “WE HAVE LEMON SIGN!” Mike, Crow, and Tom yelled as they rushed into the theater. 6..5..4..3..2..1..* Tom: You _are_ going to make a version for lemons, aren't you Mike? Mike: I don't know, buddy. >Sailor Moon and the Sailor Scouts meet Mxyzptlk, Mr. Mxyzptlk. Mike: Bond, James Bond. Crow: From the people who brought you ‘Casper Meets Wendy’...... >Guest appearance by Lois Lane and Clark Kent Crow: Of course. > Part 1, Mike: The Miracle of Birth: The Third World. Crow: Oh, bloody hell. > The Erotic Embarrassing Wishes of the Scouts, Part 1 Rated R Tom: It begins....... Crow: Ummm........interesting title. > Part 2, Tom: Electric Boogaloo! > Xena, Gabrielle, Hercules, and Iolaus come to Tokyo 20th Century Crow: Is that supposed to be a pun? >Rated R Tom: Obviously the author likes those shows. Mike and Crow: Obviously. > Part 3, The challenge to Mxyzptlk plus Calisto and Hope make trouble >Rated R > Part 4, The Chibi Scouts' trick to Mxyzptlk Rated PG > >Starring the voices of: Crow: This is text, right? Tom: Yup. Crow: Then why the voice casting? Mike: Maybe Darren thinks someone will make this into a movie.... All: AAUUUGGGGGGHHHHHHH!!!!! > Terri Hawks as Serena Tsukino/Super Sailor Moon > Karen Bernstein as Amy Mizuno/Super Sailor Mercury > Katie Griffith as Raye Hino/Super Sailor Mars > Susan Roman as Lita Makoto/Super Sailor Jupiter > Stephanie Morganstern as Mina Minako/Super Sailor Venus > Traci Hoyt as Rini Tsukino/Super Sailor Chibi Moon Mike: Oh, a Chibi Usa lemon.......... Crow: Ugh.......I want off now........ > Toby Procter as Darien (Sorry, no material for Tuxedo Mask this times >ladies.) Tom: Yes! > > Guest Voices > Dean Cain as Clark Kent/Superman Mike: More main characters that don't have anything to do with the scouts. > Teri Hatcher as Lois Lane > Howie Mandel as Mr. Mxyptlk > Alyssa Milano as Queen Alyssa, the Queen of the Dark Moon (Just use your >imagination) Crow: I am, oh, I am. Tom: Well, _I'm_ trying not to. > Pamela Lee as the eager pleasing Galaxy. Tom: Any relation to the ever-lovin', blue-eyed Thing? > Yes, Pamela has her own videos, >but that is another story. Bots: Hmmm..... Mike: Don't even think about it. > Greg > Ken > Chad > Grandpa Hino Mike: Ah, characters who say nothing. > > This story is R rated, not Hentai as it may sound when read. Tom: Hmmm, that's a new one on me. > These are >the wishes teens may wish for, Tom: Correction: male teens. Crow: Like the author. > and this imp Mxyzptlk actually grants them, >including the sexual tone foreplay people use in the act of sex, but I >changed some of it. Crow: Ah....ha. > "Come" will be used for the girls when they are at an >'all time high' in the heat of passion, Crow: And that's a new one on *me*. Tom: I suddenly want to watch a Cheech and Chong episode. Get it? 'All time high?' Ah, I kill me. > when they start forming thier 'juices.' Mike: Cranapple? Tom: Strawberry? Crow: Guava? > THis story may offend many readers of Sailor Moon > and certainly shock >them, > but what if the girls did have sexual desires? I mean, they work24 >hours a day virtually Crow: Oh? And what are their jobs exactly? Mike: That's a story for another lemon. > and have grown close to their boyfriends, Serena, Amy, >and Lita the closest. Rini has her own little thoughts for she is growing >up after all, but her scene is artistic. Mike: Nonononononononononononononono....... > Please treat the sex of Serena, >Amy, and Lita as 'R rated', not H or X Tom: So he has no grasp of the rating system? Crow: He’s going by the movie system apparently... Tom: Oh. > for the other 3 parts are a bit better. >Serena and her friends are 16, and 16 is the average age for teenaged sex. >Rini is 14 and very shapely like Serena. Crow: Argh! Bad mental image!! > I will write a better prologue for this. Remember, it is R rated, sort of >like Great Expecttions, which is even mentioned a bit too! Tom: Sorry, but I have no 'great expectations' for this lemon. > Never saw it, but >the ad for it was certainly great, Mike: So, in his mind, that's as good as seeing it. Tom: Sort of like saying Godzilla's a good movie by seeing the promos. > which is how this story should be treated >when sex is put into play. It is the desires Serena, Amy, and Lita have >tried to hide, Mike: But I found out and plan to show you their most embarrassing secrets.......unless they pay up! > but only denied themselves an oppertunity to explore it as Tom: It would be really cheap and disgusting. >the typical 16 year old. > I stress heavily that the boyfriends are very, very safe. They provide >condoms, and the girls themselves are very safe. Crow: Oh, that sounds ok! Mike: This might not be so bad.......for a badly written lemon. > I am aware of teen >pregnancy and STD, Tom: The dank hell hole I live in gets CNN. Mike: Hey... > which is why this is safe sex. When Mxyzptlk provides >the wishes, he mostly does it as a joke to amuse himself. Tom: Thus, Mxyzptlk is the author. Mike: Be nice Tom. Tom: I have a very bad feeling about this one already Mike, and I wanna get every shot I can before my head goes. Crow: Ah, you can cut the foreshadowing with a knife..... > THere is a new character from the Dark Moon named Alyssa, and she likes >sex too, especially when the lady guards have to play with themselves or >face her wrath for failures. Mike: I take it back. This is bad, real bad. > ALyssa's favorite guard is her right wing girl >Galaxy, Crow: She's very conservative, votes Republican, and worships Rush Limbaugh? > who is eager to please and willing to go very erotic at times to >please her best friend. Again, don't treat it as Hentai, Tom: I'm not listening! Lalalalalalalalalala.......... > it is just the >bizarre actions of a Queen wanting things done her way or she must be >pleased instead of angered over failures. Crow: Uh....anybody get that? Mike: If Dr. Thinker wrote a lemon..... Tom: The grammar would be better and the characters would be in character. Crow: Zing! > Though the Queen loves sexual >foreplay from Galaxy, she is not weird! Mike: I'll reserve my own judgement on that. > Galaxy playing with herself is just >to please her Queen and put her in a better happy mood. Tom: Yup, that's weird. Mike: Yeah, I have to agree with Servo on that one. What about you Crow? Crow: It's normal for a lemon, and that's all I got to say about that. > It will be revealed >that Alyssa is Queen Beryl's daughter, but grew up in 30th century Tokyo so >Beryl wouldn't see her dead. Mike: There goes the story. Tom: Plot? We don't need no stinkin' plot! > Galaxy is the right wing guard Mike: Nah, we already did that joke. > who is a good >fighter, but just needs more practice. Alyssa is at least 21 Crow: Or 22, or 50, or 90.......... > and is >determined to avenge her mom's death by going after Serena and her friends >if they get in the way. Tom: Put this stuff in the story, not in the prologue! > NExt week, a better Prologue. Crow: You mean there won't be one? > THis is just to warn you what you will read >is R rated, All: H rated. > but the sex tones are guaranteed to please anyone as it is done >appropriately to try and keep it R rated, and I hope I succeeded. Mike: We hope so too. > > > Tom: Like the human mind, space is vast and empty. Mike: Hey! Crow: The world is a dark and lonely place. > Alyssa, the Queen of the Dark Moon faced all her warriors, the failed >warriors. Often, they were asked to do a job, and each one has failed, even >her best warrior Tempest was now out of the picture, locked away in an >Earthly nut hospital. Crow: Thereby ignoring the established backstory. Tom: Backstory? We don't need no stinkin'........ Mike: Knock it off. > > Every leader of the Negaverse has failed to get Sailor Moon and her >friends, and even in their wimpy teen identities of Serena Tsukino, Amy >Mizuno, Raye Hino, Lita Makoto, and Mina Minako. Tom: Hey fanboy, Lita could kick your ass! > They also failed to get >their newest addition, Chibi Moon, the Rabbit Rini Tsukino, Mike and Tom: The RABBIT?! Mike: That's it, this guy is seriously screwed up. Tom: Maybe she's being controlled by Pippkin? Crow: No, Chibi Usa means little rabbit in Japanese. Tom: But he didn't call her Chibi Usa, Crow. Crow: Oh. Well, uh, Chibi Moon is the DIC version.... All: ARGHHHH!! Mike: Are we going to do that everytime someone says ‘DIC’? Tom: No! That’s the Ratliff gag. Mike: Oh, right. > the daughter of >Neo Queen Serenity, her number one arch rival. First, her mother, the >beloved Queen Beryl. Crow: What about her? Tom: Fill in the plot point. > Alyssa held the picture of her mother as the warriors >were all silence, remembering their first leader. Mike: They way she casually slaughtered generals. They'll never forget her. > Serena had killed her as >Princess Serenity. Then, Alan and Ann failed to get them, letting Sailor >Moon turn them good. Wiseman, he had the best chance but both Serena and >Rini blasted him. Professor Tomae nearly got them, even using his daughter >Christine to become an evil lady known as Mistress 9 to lock horns against >the scouts, but not only Christine got healed, she was now known as Sailor >Saturn. Tomae died. Galaxia...Alyssa starred sourly at her dear friend. Crow: Exposition finished? Good. >She was so close, so close. Tom: To the edge. > She had ripped all of Serena's clothes off, but >even when Serena was nude, she still fought! Mike: Well, she should be used to it by now. > Galaxia came close to killing >Serena, she got rid of all her friends the Scouts, Darien, and that so >called Chibi Chibi, a Star Child. Tom: So it's a Space Odyssey crossover? > Galaxia let herself be healed and was now >a good girl. Crow: Yes, a gooooooood girl! Mike: You wanna clean up the theater? > > Alyssa soured Tom: Well, this *is* a lemon! > ...good girl! Mike: Crappy author! > Good girls were losers! Crow: She prefers naughty girls! > She faced all her >warriors. "Every night, every day, Mike: I think of you. > I send you all out to get Crow: --pizza! And what do you bring me? Tacos! I hate tacos! > Sailor Moon. >And everytime you leave, someone does not come back! Tom: Sure, it was General Ryouga, but we have an image to maintain! > I am the new leader, >and I do not, nor will not, tolerate your FAILURES!! My mother did not raise >a failure, I will not be a failure to her, the great Queen Beryl! Crow: Someone has issues. > I am the >Queen of Black Spades, the Ace of Spades! Mike: And for some reason, the King of Hearts! > I do not like it when Sailor Moon >and her friends beat you!" she screamed. Crow: Only I get to beat you! > "Your majesty." General Galaxy said, bowing on the ground. "Please >accept my deepest apologies. I cannot offer excuses, Tom: Wait a minute, it looks like I can! > that we nearly had her, we >did, Crow: So did they have her, or didn't they? > but her friends stopped us tonight." > "I do not accept any excuse, Galaxy!" Alyssa waved her arms and Galaxy >was now nude! Tom: Wow, he doesn't waste any time does he? Crow: I'm so proud... > "Your majesty, please! Don't let me be nude, I love that uniform!" Mike: I hug it, and squeeze it, and pet it, and call it George! > Galaxy >sobbed, very embarrassed as she covered her breasts. > "You will be nude until Crow: --we grab the attention of men, ages 13-90! > I feel you are ready to fight Sailor Moon. And >when you do, you will do what I did to you, you will rip off their little >uniforms and bring me back their bodies all bare and dead, you got it?" Mike: Dead and naked, I can't stress this enough people... >Alyssa thundered. Tom: It's Alyssa, God of Thunder! > "Yes, my Queen." Galaxy sobbed. "I am so sorry, please...I don't like >being nude." Mike: This guy's redundant. Crow: What? Mike: This guy's redundant. Crow: Oh. > "Will you be good, then?" Alyssa smiled wickedly. > "Yes." Galaxy sobbed. > "Ok...if you please me with a massage, and I do mean the sexual type, I >may give you back your uniform. But you must please me!" Alyssa ordered. >She wasn't weird, Tom: Oh, I get ya! Nudge nudge wink wink, ifyaknowwhatimean! > she just liked it when Galaxy touched her. Mike: With a cattle prod. > It made her >feel powerful when she Mike: --stuck her finger in a electrical socket. > was in a bad mood and needed her friend to help her. Crow: So, she strips her friends in front of her underlings and makes them pleasure her in public? Mike: Yup, but she's not *weird*. >Galaxy wasn't a bad solider, but she had to learn that failure is not to be >tolerated. All the girl soldiers who failed had to do a very humiliating >deed, they had to strip the Queen nude and perform sexually. Mike: What about male generals? Tom: They answer to Zoicite. Crow: Damn you ZOICITE! > Again, Alyssa >wasn't weird, Tom: SERENITY NOW, SERENITY NOW! Hmmmmm, that doesn't work after all........ARGH! > she just loved seeing her girl soldiers performing. It made >them stronger in their next battle, and Galaxy did much better. Tom: So, having sex with their commanding officers makes them better fighters? Crow: Well, there’s La Blue Girl... > "All you warriors give me worthless excuses. Galaxy, come to my right and >stand tall and firm!" Crow: Ifyaknowwhatimean! Mike: Ok, that's enough of that. > "Yes your majesty." Galaxy said, doing what she was ordered as she faced >the warriors Tom: --and they ran at her, their weapons drawn, yelling their battle cries as they dismembered her in a gory blood feast for their serpent god, Boolig! Crow: Sounds like a lost scene from the Eye of Argon. Or Cave Dwellers. > fully nude. Mike: But of course. > She felt Alyssa stroke her bare butt and tried not >to move. > "Why are you such a bad girl? Tom: Mike, does that count as weird? Mike: We're long past weird here buddy. > All I ask is you get Sailor Moon. I do not >like it when you fail, it makes me a bad Queen. Mike: Of course, all that raping and pillaging doesn't look good either. > I don't want to hurt my >pal." Crow: Just mortally embarrass her. Mike: But since you're a subordinate, I can do whatever I want! BWAHAHAHAHA!! Tom: Was that a flashback to your days at Happy Temps? > Alyssa said, gently touching her friend's breasts and now moving down >to her pussy. > "I know, your majesty. Failure is not an excuse." Galaxy said firmly as >she felt Alyssa feeling her over. She secretly loved Alyssa touching her, >but had to stay in line. Tom: Or she'll be in *real* trouble! > "Now, get on the ground and please me! You know what to do!" Alyssa >ordered the nude guard. Crow: Nude guards too? Where's the contract, I wanna join up! > "Yes your majesty, I will please you good." Galaxy said eagerly as she >laid down and played with herself sexually. Tom: Isn't she supposed to be pleasuring the Queen? Mike: Don't think about it. Crow: We have H! > She began rubbing her pussy >hard, hoping Alyssa would clean the wet juices like last time. Mike: Yes, Quick 'N' Bright also gets out those stubborn juice stains! Now how much would you pay? > Galaxy loved >doing that, it relaxed her and pleased Queen Alyssa for she loved to clean >her hot wet pussy. > "Don't any of you warriors think of this as a thrill! Crow: Was that a question ma'am? Tom: No wonder she's so mad! Galaxy stole all the question marks! > Galaxy, rub harder! >Harder! Scream Tom: Dance! Yell! > when it comes!" Alyssa ordered the eager guard who began to >bounce up and down from the floor, moaning and crying with joy. "I need a >warrior, a tough warrior that can digest Sailor Moon's wretched powers! Mike: So that's what they call it these days! > I am >sick of failures and having to watch this as my only thrill to keep me from >KILLING YOU ALL!" Tom: Pleasure her or die? Ooh, that's a tough one...... > The warriors were all silent as Galaxy began having her orgasm. > "Who has the power to take all the powers of the Sailor Scouts, and not >fail me?" Mike: I do, I wanna die! > A voice began to laugh, which brought Galaxy to her feet. Crow: I just realized what I did......It was really gross! > "Hey! You ruined my fun." Galaxy pouted. Tom: She recovered pretty quick. > She couldn't come and hoped she >can do it again, or Alyssa would be in a bad mood. Crow: Yeah, Marrissa doesn't like to be kept waiting. >"Who it there? I Alyssa Marsha Mike: ..Amber Flores.. Tom: She has the diction for it. > Beryl order you to show yourself evil voice!" Tom: Where did Shampoo come from? Crow: Takes a voice to...know a voice...I suppose. > "Do you wish for someone to get rid of Sailor Moon?" the voice asked. > "Yes! Who are you?" Alyssa demanded. > "Your wish is granted, Alyssa, mighty Queen of Spades." A card of the >Queen of Spades fell on the ground. Mike: Ah, symbolism. Crow: Or Gambit. > "Galaxy! Pick it up and stay on your knees!" Alyssa ordered. Crow: I bet Galaxy's glad she bought those Presidential Kneepads, now. > Galaxy did what she was told, keeping quiet. Her body felt cold but Galaxy >wouldn't feel it. Tom: The hell? > "You stop showing me these Earthly cards! Mike: I'm not interested in real estate! > Reveal yourself!" > "Is this better? Nice look." The man said, giving Galaxy a little swat on >her bare behind. > "Your majesty, permit me to beat on this man! Crow: Does anybody else find that a trifle dirty? Tom: Yes. > Only you touch me!" Galaxy >yelled. > "Get back down on your knees!" Crow: Beg! Sit up! Play dead! > Alyssa yelled at Galaxy. She quickly did. Mike: Sieg Heil! > A man, resembling Howie Mandel Tom: Could it be.......Howie Mandel?! Crow: Perish the thought! > stood in front of Queen Alyssa. Alyssa >looked him over and tried to use her magic. Tom: Nothing up my sleeve! > "Really, you are a naughty Queen." The man smiled. Crow: What are you doing after the fic? > "Hmmm, you passed the clothing test very well! Mike: The Negaverse has a dress code? > Tell me of yourself, >human!" Alyssa ordered. Galaxy got up and stood firmly > by the Queen's right >throne, Crow: She's lucky it wasn't the wrong throne or...... > still naked. Alyssa sat down. "Galaxy, on your knees now! You >shall be spanked when I am done since you didn't come!" Tom: Oh, way to go Crow! Crow: D'oh! > "Deepest apologies, my Queen." Galaxy whispered. > "Don't worry, I won't hurt you, ok?" Alyssa whispered, patting her bare >behind. Galaxy smiled, she just had to act tough around this mystery man. >Alyssa was a good evil Queen Mike: Come again? Crow: She probably will. Tom: Hmm......nice pun, I give it a 5. > Galaxy proudly looked up to. Crow: Since she's on her knees, she'd have to. > Alyssa sat down >on her throne, Tom: Ahhhhhhhhhh................. Mike: Oh, grow up. Bots: Tell that to the author! > putting her feet on Galaxy's bare bottom and rubbing it. Crow: What was she rubbing it with? > "You have very nice clothes, my Queen. The thong suit is in." Crow: Especially when it starts riding up-MRPHM! Mike: Next one get's you a timeout buddy! > The man >smiled at the exchange between Galaxy and Alyssa. Tom: There's an idea! The Thong exchange! Mike: Don't you start! > "Never mind my clothes!" Alyssa said angrily. She had on a thong one >piece suit and a large black cape. > "I am of magic. Unlike your warriors, I can absorb all of Sailor Moon's >powers. But rather then kill them automatically, I ask to have fun with >Sailor Moon and her friends." the man said wickedly. Crow: Yeah, you, Oscar, Nav, Kane, Darren Shivo, Ted Polack, Chris Caldwell, Gonterman....... Tom: The list goes on. > "I don't want fun Tom: I want a feast. > unless it's with my best friend, Galaxy, who has >displeased me with her failure! I want those girls dead! Mike: Hey, take a number. > They killed my >mother, I want vengeance for Queen Beryl!" Tom: She's probably spinning in her grave now. Crow: I'm not kidding when I say, I'd hate to see Alyssa's childhood. > Alyssa yelled. > "You can get them once I take away their powers. When their guard is >down, you can kill them. The man said. Mike: He said, The man said? Crow: Maybe. > "OK, I will give you one chance. Fail, and you will be destroyed!" Crow: Or made to perform sick sex acts for her majesty's pleasure. > Galaxy scowled at the man. How dare he steal her job! Tom: Yeah, I'm the queen's whipping boy! > "Who are you?" > "I am Mxyzptlk. Mr. Mxyzptlk. Heh heh heh heh." Mike: Heh heh heh, shut up dillweed! > > 14 year old Rini Tsukino slept soundly in Serena's room. Tom: Covered with the fresh blood of it's past owner, she slept, dreaming of her next victim........ Mike: This is really getting to you isn't it? Tom: I'd like to be optimistic like you Mike, but I know better. > She was so happy her mom sent her back to help Serena again, she deeply >missed her. Crow: But what she *really* missed was Serena's collection of assorted wands. Mike: TIME OUT! > Her mom understood Rini's pain after she got home, her schooling in >Crystal Tokyo had suffered badly and she realized Rini missed Serena badly. Tom: Serena *is* her mom! >Her mom was Queen Serenity, who was Serena of the future. Her dad was King >Endymion, Darien of the future. Mike: Darien of the Future meets Darien of the Past in a no holds barred cage match. Only on Pay per View! > Though she was sad to send Rini back, she >did deserve to be happy with the teenager she proudly called Mike: Meatball Head? Tom: Bunny? Tom: I, uh, read the manga... Crow: MRPGHM!!!! > mom, and Serena >was after all a great teenager who could learn how to be a better parent in >the future when she really had Rini later on. Every night, Rini would go to >bed crying and wouldn't play at all. Tom: There's a disturbing thought. Mike: Then it's perfectly at home in this fanfic. > It broke Serenity's heart to see Rini >like that, but Rini did love her as a teenager and seemed to relate to her >more. It wasn't that Rini didn't love the Queen, Crow: MRPPDHMMEHmmmmm! Mike: That's enough of that! > but being a Queen and King >meant heavy responsibilities for them to look after Rini. Not even the >Future Scouts could cheer her up for they were too old for her to relate to. >The younger Scouts in the 20th century were better. Tom: *Much* better! > Anyway, Serenity sent Rini back because of Queen Alyssa of the Dark Moon. Tom: Yeah, send your kid into a warzone. Mike: Well, this is Chibi we're talking about...... >Alyssa started developing an attack on 20th Century Tokyo and was related to >Queen Beryl for she was her mom. Mike: What? Beryl's her mom?! You don't say! Tom: Stop stealing my schtick Mike. > Alyssa bored Tom: Now there's some symbolism. > a deep grudge to Serena who >had killed her mom, and rather then try to kill Queen Serenity, she'd kill >the Princess. Alyssa went back in time to 20th century Tokyo and reunited >all of Beryl's old warriors. Mike: Enter key! Use it! > Queen Serenity ruled Crystal Tokyo in the 30th >Century and that is when she had Rini. Rini was sent back to Tokyo 20th >Century and stayed with Serena until she got the Silver Crystal. Rini never >knew who Serena was to her, Tom: Or how she could reach such high decibel levels. Crow: YATA!!! > but soon heard her real name was Serenity, like >her name was actually Serenity the 3rd ChibiUsa All: What the... Tom: There are three Chibi's?! Crow: Isn’t that a sign of the Apocalypse? Mike: Maybe....if there were four of them riding horses. > Tsukino. As the months went >by, Rini got to know who Serena was as Sailor Moon, Mike: It took her at least a month to figure it out? Crow: Hey, Clark Kent probably had them all fooled. Tom: She's pretty stupid if she came from their future and didn't know anything about them. > and her friends were >Amy/Sailor Mercury, Raye/Sailor Mars, Lita/Sailor Jupiter, and Mina/Sailor >Venus, just like in the future. Then she got to know the biggest secret Tom: She found out how they make hotdogs! >along with her dear friend Serena. Serena wasn't just her best friend, Crow: Ifyouknowwhatimean! Mike: I thought we discussed that Crow. Crow: Bite me, it's fun! >Serena was Rini's mom, and Darien was Rini's dad. Mike: And my kitty's name is Diana! Crow: Help me....... > Rini couldn't be anymore >happier, Tom: Therefore, she was depressed. > which was probably why she related to them more in the 20th century >for they could have fun and be kids again. Serenity really wished she could >be a kid for Rini, but had a kingdom to run. She knew she could be a better >mother to Rini as a teenager, and maybe 20th century education would be >better for Rini to learn the world. Tom: Is he done yet? ZZZZZzzzzzzz....... Mike: Great. Just great. > When Rini was 12, she did do very well >at Crossroads Juuban Jr. High. Crow: After all, she was the teachers *pet*! Mike: Crow! Tom: Insert public education joke here. > Rini was also so happy to be Chibi Moon >with her mom in the past, it pleased her to wear that multicolored short >skirt and just have fun with Serena and all her friends. Tom: And she'll have fun fun fun until her daddy takes her multicolored skirt away! Crow: Did you just hear what you said?! Tom: No, why? Mike: Ah, you're in denial. Good sign. > Rini was so happy when her mom told her she can live with Serena until she >got married to Darien. Crow: Then it's out on the street with her! > Once she did that, Rini had to come home after she >graduated high school. Rini understood for she had to be born out of >wedlock Mike: So....Chibi's a bastard? Mike: It's not funny! I'm trying to be serious here....... > and couldn't alter time once Darien and Serena did get married. Tom: Sure she can! It's easy, just kill some butterflies or sneeze on a bunch of stuff! > Rini had another wish, Crow: I wanna decide who lives and dies! > to send back her boyfriend. It was granted, and >Chad Lucas was honored to be able to protect the Royal Daughter again as >Tuxedo Masquerade. Tom: Well, isn't that nice? Two Tux-boys and 3 Chibi Usa's! Crow: I betcha he's played by Wil Wheaton. > That would mean he could be closer to Rini without >feeling intimidated by her Royal Family. Crow: Prince Valium kept beating the crap out of him. > Chad had strong feelings for Rini, Mike: So do we, disgust and hatred being the main ones. >she had such a sexy body for a 14 year old girl. > Rini had really blossomed, >he saw her full features in a bikini. Crow: That's some bikini! Mike: I don't really read the Feature section, I usually skip it and read the comics. Tom: Yeah, me too! > He wished she didn't have it on, she >must've had a beautiful body under that bikini. But Chad was careful and >respectful of Rini. Tom: Well, he is several years older than her. Mike: Like mother, like daughter, I guess. Crow: Just how old is this guy anyway? > HE kept his sexual feelings quiet Mike: Who, God? Crow: He does a very good job then. > so he wouldn't scare >Rini off. Tom: Playing those Barry Manilow records when they were alone really botched that though. > Serenity also knew Rini wanted to go back for she heard of Serena and >Galaxia battling. Crow: Obviously Darren has no grasp of a) temporal mechanics, or b) the backstory. Mike: Most likely all of the above. > She cried when Galaxia stripped her nude and nearly killed >her, Mike: Really? I thought she'd be laughing! > it reminded her of when she was Black Lady, and when she had to >recharge her power, she slept nude. Crow: Who? Serena, Serenity, Chibi, Alyssa, or Galaxia? > Though Rini was glad to see her mom had >healed Galaxia, she felt Serena needed extra protection from Alyssa, and >Serenity agreed. Tom: You'd think Serena's future self would know when she was being threatened. > Now Rini was 14 and happy. Mike: Except when she watches the Teletubbies, they always get her depressed. Tom: I'd figure she'd be right at home with them, what with their colorful costumes and strange names...... > Her body was filling out nicely. Tom: I get the feeling Darren likes to keep reminding us of that fact. > She loved >seeing herself naked when she got up with her mom for it made her a happy >girl all day. Crow: They get up together....Naked? Tom: I'm not listening! Lalalalalalaaaaaaaaaaaaa!!!!!! > Rini loved it when Serena hugged her like that, it made her >feel special whether she was clothed or not, Mike: Tom, buddy, are you ok? Tom: Ice-cream........... Crow: Hey, this is great! Why didn't I think of this before? Crow: Awwww........ > her mom loved only her. Mike: Darien? Who's Darien? > Then >she and Serena would get dressed and fix their hair. Rini had one more year >and then she can join her mom in high school, Rini was in the 8th grade now, >Serena was 16 and in the 10th grade. Rini was working extra hard so she can >skip some grades and be in the same grade as her mom, hoping to graduate >with her. Crow: She must be putting in a lot of late nights with her male teachers! Mike: Yup, you're definitely better. > Rini was glad she had her weapons to help her mom, she got her >little Moon Scepter Tom: Serena having borrowed her big Moon Scepter.... Tom: Thanks. > and some exciting stun dart barrettes in her hair Mike: She's so excited, and she just can't hide it! Crow: I would be too if I got to hang out with Lita all day! Rrrrowrrrrrr! > to >throw at the enemy to stun them. Tom: Shocking. Mike: No, stunning. > She also had a wrist cross bow and arrow >to fire small fire arrows by calling Moon Cross Bar, Strike! And her very >own Thunder Zap, calling it Moon Thunder Zap, Strike! Tom: There isn't any thunder on the Moon! There's not even any air! Crow: You are forgetting that this is the Sailor Moon moon. I mean, they have talking cats for god's sake, so why not air on the moon? > Serena got the same >weapons too, Crow: Except bigger! And shinier! And longer! And........ Mike: Ok, we get the idea. > and went from being Eternal Sailor Moon back to Super Sailor >Moon for people confused her with being 'the high mighty Messiah.' > Rini heard a door click, and Serena was coming Crow: D'oh! > in. She looked at the Crow: Whew! Mike: I oughta yell at you for that. >electric clock radio, it was 4:30am! Tom: Do you know where your children are? Crow: Yeah, she's right here! Mike: At cram school of course. > "Mommy?" she whispered. > "Oh Rini, I'm sorry I woke you." Serena whispered. She turned on the >light and was revealed as Super Sailor Moon. > Rini saw a nasty gash on her leg! Mike: Get it off, get it off, get it off!!!!! Tom: The 100-meter gash. > "Mommy! Your leg." Tom: What about it? Crow: Well, it's bleeding...... Tom: What?! Ba-bye now! *thump* > Rini said, trying not to talk loud. Crow: What?! I can't hear you youngun, I lost my Miracle Ear around here somewheres........ > "Sh, sh." Super Sailor Moon whispered, hugging her close. "I got blasted, Mike: That's the last time I mix milk and scotch I'll tell you that. Crow: A little something for the Stephen King fans out there. >but I got rid of the monster. That Galaxy is one mean right wing general." Tom: You might even say she Rush Limbaughed me. > "Let me heal you, Mommy. Is your brooch low?" Crow: You might say that....... > "Yeah, I had to go extra hard." Sailor Moon said as she took off her heart >brooch and touched the little bow. She was now Serena. Crow: What? No de-transformation sequence? I've been robbed, I want my money back! > Serena had on her >favorite short skirt, she was dating Darien when the monster struck. Mike: Naw, I think we've used up all our Rush jokes. Bots: Awww........... > "Moon, Crises Power." Tom: Does it still work if she misspells it? > Rini whispered, opening her heart brooch. She >smiled brightly as her tank top nightie disappeared and was briefly nude. All: GYAH! >Her body formed a suit and then gloves appeared, just like her mom. Her >pink tiara formed and then her multi colored skirt Tom: Dude, colors....... > of white, yellow and pink >formed on her waist. 2 rubies formed on her rabbit eared hair style Mike: And that's why he calls her Rabbit. >followed by 6 barrette darts in front of her forehead that were the stun >darts. Light colored Pink boots were on her little feet. She was Chibi >Moon, the champion of justice! Crow: And Avatar of disgustingly cute pink things. > Chibi Moon opened her other brooch that was >her mom's old star brooch and used it to heal Serena's badly cut leg. Tom: And she cried, like Nancy Karigan! > "Moon, Healing, Power. I'm glad Mommy sent me back to you, Crow: --other mommy. > your past >self. I missed you lots and lots." Mike: Limbo lasted forever! > Chibi Moon smiled as Serena's leg was >now normal. Crow: Damn, I was hoping for scales! > "I'm glad too. Galaxia was tough enough, but Alyssa is meaner." Tom: She's a poopy head! > Serena >said as Chibi Moon leaped on her lap, burying her Mike: --hatchet deep into Serena's face. Tom: That was dark! I like it! > head on her chest, sniffling. Crow: ARGH! Get it off, get it off, get it off! Tom: Hey, I smell Rei's grandpa......way to go old man! > "I got scared, Mommy. I wanted you to tuck me in and tell me stories. Mike: Tell me about that time you crossed over with Ranma 1/2 again! > I >get scared when you fight and I have to sleep alone. Tom: Even my stuffed animals won't come near me anymore! > Please don't fight at >night." Crow: Yeah, let the Negaverse take over the world. Tom: Besides, it says she has to in the theme song. Mike: How exactly does she win love by daylight anyway? Crow: Probably one of those embarrassing game shows. > Chibi sobbed. > "Oh Chibi, I hate it too. It pains me to fight alone and not have my >little Chibi Usa at my side. Tom: Especially when you run off with my medication! > But you need your sleep. I want you passing >school and not turn out like me and ending up how to struggle." Crow: How to Struggle, by Chibi Usa. Usually it's a good idea to struggle when someone's forcing your head underwater......... > Serena >whispered, trying not to cry herself. Crow: Ooh, nice touch! She might buy that...... > It hurt her how she had to leave >Rini, even if it was for a few hours. Tom: Ah, you're just going through cutesy poo withdrawal. Give yourself a couple days and you'll feel better. > She really loved Rini and wanted to >be by her side so she could be a better mom to her in the future. Mike: So she's taking care of all of the embarrassing, awkward moments right now. > "I was >scared too, they nearly got me. If Greg hadn't told Amy what he saw..." Crow: Whoa! Way to go Greg! > The girls didn't see a man with curly black hair, a goatee beard, >earrings, and a black velvet jacket watch the exchange. Tom: Oh, he's using that old 'Wear the Tackiest Outfit and Not be Noticed' trick. Works every time. > Poor girls, he >smiled, watching how tight Serena held Chibi Moon. Mike: Tighter, tighter, tighter! Tom: Mike, dear, are you feeling well? Mike: Yeah. Of course. Why...wouldn't I? Tom: Good. > He knew who they all >were, Serena was Sailor Moon, Rini was her daughter and Chibi Moon. Darien >was Tuxedo Mask and her dad. Crow: Who's dad? > Amy, Mina, Raye, and Lita were Mercury, Venus, >Mars, and Jupiter. They didn't impress him as being Super Scouts or Pretty >Soldiers. Mike: Well, why the hell not? Tom: Malachite's stalking them? Crow: Could be. > "I wanted to help. I wish I was older so I can help you more." > "You do, Rini. Tom: I'm pretty sure she knows what she wished for Serena. > You do help when you can. You need sleep." > "I had to stall your parents, your dad was on the war path hearing you >date Darien. Crow: Yeah! Get 'im pa! > I'm glad he didn't hunt him down. Mike: Yeah, your dad's a psycho, mommy. > I wish Clark was here to >help us with Alyssa." Tom: He oughta be strong enough to hold her down....... > Rini referred to Clark>Planet in Metropolis, New York Tom: No no, Metropolis is the DC version of L.A. Gotham is DC's version of New York. Mike: I'll take your word for it. > of the United States. New York was very far >from Tokyo, Crow: At least, it was to normal people. And weaker superheroes. Tom: Like the Senshi. > at least 11000 miles and a long 17 hour flight. Mike: I wonder if Darren actually flew to Tokyo to find out? Tom: The sad thing is, he might have. Crow: Superman wouldn't need a plane anyway, so I think we're supposed to ignore this part. > Serena, Rini, >Raye, Mina, Lita, Amy, Darien, Chad, Greg, Ken, Tom: Lyle, Eric, Ranma, Akane, Stan, Kyle, Cartman, Kenny..... Crow: Little Joe, Hoss........ > and the cats Luna and >Artemis all knew Clark Kent was Superman Crow: Why would he let them know his secret identity? > and Lois Lane was one time Ultra >Woman. Mike: Ah, we're using the 'Lois and Clark' continuity..........I think. > They were married now, and were going to be in Rini's future >fighting as Superman and Ultra Woman. Tom: Hey! There can't be an Ultra Woman and a Superman! She needs his powers to do it and she gave them back at the end of the show! What, does she gain powers somewhere? Does she go down to Walmart and buy some? What?! Crow: I'd laugh, but that's entirely possible, at least in this fanfic. Oh, by the way Tom....... Tom: What? Crow: Faaaannnnnnbbbbbbooooooottttttttt!!!!!! > Lois had high hopes to be Ultra Woman >again, Tom: Grrr........ > she really missed fighting as a superhero Tom: And she didn't like being a superhero in the first place! > and always worried of the >girls and the Negaverse, never wanting to hear if the girls got hurt. Mike: So they never told her. Next! > "Clark's married now. I don't think we need him just yet, but I will call >if we do need help." Crow: Even though the 'Lois and Clark' Superman's pretty weak, wouldn't he be able to whup the Negaverse by now? > Serena sighed as she lay back on her bed, still fully >clothed. Crow: That'll change in a hurry! > She was so tired. > "It's 4:30am, Clark is in New York, you subtract..." Tom: Who said that? Mike: I think Darren was trying to impress us with his math skills. > "No, sweetie, when you fly East from here, you add. Mike: Punishment, punishment, punishment!! > New York is one day >back from us, we are one day forward. Crow: We'll take your word for it. > 10am in New York time I believe >starts our tomorrow." Tom: Uh.....huh? > "That's right, Clark is at work with Lois I bet." Mike: What with fighting crime and all. > Chibi smiled as she >changed back to Rini, still in her pretty tank top that said Chibi Moon and >Sailor Moon #1. Crow: Ah, isn't that cute? Kill her! > Serena sat up and smiled. "That's a nice tank top, you >look real pretty." Crow: Gosh Rini, you shore are purdy! Tom: Mommy, are you trying to seduce me? Mike: Please, let's not go there. > "Thanks, Mom. I love my body more." Crow: Mike, do women really talk like that? Mike: Well, I'm no expert Crow, but no. I'm pretty sure they don't. > Rini smiled, teasingly sticking her >hand Mike: --into a nearby blender. > under her tank top and stroking her pussy. Tom: Gah... Crow: What's Diana doing under there anyway? > Rini loved her pussy, it >was the same as Serena's, it was golden blonde. Crow: Ah hah! Crow: I knew it was a dye job, I just knew it! Tom: Crow, are you ok?! Crow: Dirty.........feel so dirty...... > Rini hoped to see it. She >just loved seeing the body nude these days, Tom: Must be a well-preserved cadaver if she still wants to see it nude. Crow: Hey! That's my line! Mike: Nice recovery. > Serena and her friends were very >nice and developed. Tom: Well, they’re printed on Kodak paper. > Rini giggled as Serena drew her close and patted her bare bottom Mike: What the...? It's hollow! > that >showed under her shirt. Rini liked that, it meant Serena loved her a lot >when she touched her. Crow: I call that type of love, Hillbilly Love! > "I love touching you, Rini. Tom: Can I chain you to my radiator? > It makes me happy to see you are growing up." Mike: In a completely platonic and motherly way of course. >Serena smiled, gently massaging Rini's smooth bottom. Rini sighed, she >loved that so much when Serena touched her. Mike: We know, we know. Get it over with, you disgusting little....... > It was with love, not sexual as >some people may feel. Tom: This not-so-subtle message brought to you by David Gonterman. Mike: Maybe this was the political content from A-ko: Promise. Crow: No, I think that was about lesbians and...uh......oh screw it. > "I am so tired of these late night calls to fight the >Negavese. Crow: Why can't they do it during school! > I did hope Darien would get me home by 9, but that Negavese kept >us out until at least 2 in the morning! Tom: Then again, she could be into S and M and Darien got a little rough. > The buses stopped running Mike: They'll never catch the roadrunner at that rate. > so I had >to walk Lita home, carrying her." Crow: Oh, now she's lying! Lita would have carried *her* home. > Serena sighed, kissing Rini on her >forehead. That made Rini's little moonbeam light up everytime Serena kissed >her. Rini returned the kiss, making Serena's moonbeam on her forehead >return the love. Tom: You got a receipt for that? > "Clark told me a few months ago he felt worn out and sad. Mike: Then he discovered Viagra.........vavaVOOOMMM! Crow: And that's the real reason they call him the Man of Steel! Mike: Crow...... > Then a stupid >imp invaded Metropolis and nearly destroyed him and Lois. Mxy something." Crow: Howie Mandel doesn't really strike me as the imp type. Tom: Yeah. Gilbert Godfrey though.... >Rini said, not knowing she referred to Mxyzptlk. And he was watching the >exchange! Tom: He's using his powers to play the market, how......unethical. Crow: Ah, Greenspan's just pissed cuz he didn't think of it sooner. > "I just need a rest. I am so tired having to fight and get up for school >4 hours later. How Clark can go without sleep is beyond me. Mike: He's Superman, buy a clue already! > I'm glad I can >sneak my homework during Study Hall." Serena sighed, closing her eyes. > "I'll help you get undressed." Crow: Uh, no. I can manage just fine! Thanks anyway! I mean it! Mike: No such luck.... > Rini smiled. She loved taking Serena's >clothes off, Tom: Especially when she didn't know about it. > and Serena didn't mind at all. Mike: Uh, of course not. > She returned the favor, which >pleased Rini. > "Thanks Pumpkin, Tom: No problem, Cantaloupe! > I owe you one tomorrow night. I ache all over." Serena >sighed as Rini took off her blouse, then pulled down her little skirt and >her underwear. Serena was now fully nude. Crow: And we have lemon, again! Mike and Tom: Yay. > "Roll over, I'll massage you. Chibi Usa style." Mike: Where did I leave my hot wax? > Rini smiled, referring to >her middle name. Tom: Which, oddly enough, was Barney for some reason. > Serena smiled as Rini knelt down on her bare bottom and rubbed her >shoulders and back. Rini had such lovely hands for a 14 year old. Crow: Though they were to wrinkled and decrepit for a ten-year-old. > "Thanks, >Rini," she whispered, her eyes closed. > "I love doing this. Mike: And since you're OOC that's very likely. > Nudity is art, I learned that in school." Tom: Lapdancing 101 is my favorite class! > Serena giggled. Crow: Corrupted child's mind? Check. > "I can feel your hair tickling my bottom. You must be >getting a good bush like me." Crow: Oh, my god.......... Mike: Duck and cover! Mike: Whew, made it! Tom: Yeah, but the fic's still going.... Crow: Well, it can't possibly get worse... Mike: I wish you hadn't said that. > Raye finally got in at 4:45am at her home in the Cherry Hills Temple. She Mike: Was stoned. Tom: It's Mitchell, starring Raye Hino! >hoped not to talk to her Grandfather, she had to keep it a secret that she >was Sailor Mars and had to help fight a monster and forgo sleep. Thank >goodness it was Friday. Tom: TGIF night on ABC. Crow: You little suck up! Tom: Am not! > But to her disgust, Chad Mocha, the temple roommate Crow: The temple has a roommate? >was still up. Boy, didn't he ever sleep? Mike: Well, he is named after a coffee flavor. > What was he, her bodyguard? Tom: We call those people stalkers, dear. > "Like where were you? I had a nice song, Raye. Raye, Raye, you give me a >chance..." Crow: Come on, let me in your pants! Mike: Hey! Crow: Well it rhymed didn't it? > Chad started to sing. Tom: Can you lend me a feeling? > Raye didn't like Chad very well. Mike: For obvious reasons. > Well, she tried but he was not right. Crow: He was left. >He had long hair that covered his eyes, a beard on his chin, Tom: A carnation in his lapel, a cigarette in his teeth, a twinkle in his eye..... Mike: Alcohol on his breath.... Crow: Sex on his mind.... > and bad talent. >"I heard a monster and ran amok," Mike: I wettum'. > she fibbed. Crow: Raye's the sensible Senshi. > "Whoa, are you becoming like Serena?" Chad teased. Tom: Ooh, he's toast. Crow: Baby don't hurt me........no more! > "No! You'd get scared too if a monster tried to get you." Mike: So, Serena's 16, Chibi's 14, and Raye is 5? Bots: You'd cry to if it happened to you. > Raye countered >angrily. Crow: Ooh, boot to the head! He ain't coming back from that one! > "And you are dressed?" Chad asked, referring to Raye's Levi Jeans and a >Starlight Cafe T-shirt. Mike: Why would he ask if she was dressed? Is he blind? Tom: He might be a Mousse clone. > Chad liked that T-shirt on Raye, she was very pretty. Tom: Well, you can't fault his taste in women. > "I..didn't want to be naked when I ran, ok?" Crow: Boo!! Mike: Settle down, Crow. > Raye said angrily. > "Sorry, don't bite my head off, man. Mike: Well, I wouldn't mind if you nibbled on it a little........Raye? Raye? > I do care for your safety, Raye." >Chad said gently. > "Well, I don't! Tom: Raye didn't know where she was headed, but she was going to get there fast....... > You are such a goof ball! You are so nosy, I just wanted >to go to bed without talking to anyone! Crow: No foreplay, gotcha. > You need a haircut, a shave, better >talent! You drive me so crazy, I wish that you were normal!" Raye shouted. Crow: Ooh, nice rant. > "Your wish is granted." A familiar voice said. Mike: Dad? Bots: Joel? > Raye was startled as her eyes flew open wide! Tom: Or, at least, wider than usual. Crow: Quick, catch 'em before they fly out the window! > She sensed someone was >watching her, but no one was there. "Raye...you're right." Crow: Hey guys, remember A-ko: The College Years? Mike and Tom: Uh huh. Crow: Good, I thought it was just me for a second there. > Chad wondered. > "Huh? What did you say?" Raye asked, her eyes wide open and startled. Tom: Her eyes must be taking up about 98% of her face by now. > "I'm sorry I upsetted you. Mike: I've been a baaaadddd little boy! > I got scared tonight Crow: I wettum' too. > so I stayed up waiting >for you. Your Grandpa asked where you were and I made up a story you were >at Serena's." Chad told her calmly, not sounding like a goof ball. Tom: Someone here must really love the name Chad. Crow: Any Darren's start showing up and I'm outta here. > "Huh?" Raye stammered. Mike: Wouldn't it be more like “H-huh?” > "I'll make breakfast and serve it to you. You can sleep late." > "Huh?" Crow: Now she really *is* acting like Serena. > "I'll make you proud, Raye, I really will. I will help make you respect >me. I'll shave and get a hair cut, Tom: Wax my legs, wash the car, walk the dog, take out the trash, kill that thing in my closet...... > I'll be the best friend you ever had, >Raye. Good night and sleep well." Chad said as he kissed the still shocked >girl on the cheek and left her bedroom. Mike: That was the most believable part of the whole fanfic. Tom: Really? Mike: No. > Chad, nice? Crow: He's being a good boy! Bring me my spanking machine! > Something was not right.> >Raye said in wonder. Tom: I coulda swore he was gay! > She was sure she heard a voice, but where? And whose >voice was that? Mike: Raye, I am not your father........ > > "I'm so happy you're ok, Amy." Greg Hill said, hugging Amy Mizuno tightly. Crow: Heh heh heh....... >He knew who she was as Sailor Mercury for he was a mind reader. Tom: Well, what's Dharma thinking right now? > He could >sense events before they happened, and he saw Sailor Moon, who was Serena, >would be hurt badly. Amy was glad the only damage Serena got was a sore >gashed leg, but was sure Rini will take care of that. Crow: More than you'd think sister. > "Yeah. It was thanks to you, Greg. That was a close one tonight." Tom: Wait, Amy and Raye were there too? Who carried them home? Because there's no way in hell they'd be standing after Lita got knocked out. Crow: Amen, brother. > Amy >smiled. > "Yeah, poor Rini would've been sad to lose her mother." Greg also knew of >Rini's future, she was the future child to Serena and Darien who will be >Queen and King of Crystal Tokyo. Crow: I wish he wouldn't keep repeating himself like that, it's not like we're going to forget about this stuff already. > "I'm so glad you moved back for good. Tom: Now hand over my Tesh cd's! > I missed you so much. Mike: Bubbles just aren't that accurate I guess. > WE had some >tough battles." Crow: What's this WE crap? > Amy told him. Tom: Absolutely nothing! Good night, everybody! > She had detailed all the fights since Beryl's >death. Crow: So, basically our fights go like this. We all do our attacks, they don't work, Serena whines, and either a new scout shows up or Luna pulls a wand outta her a-- Mike: We get the idea, Crow. > "Who was your toughest?" Mike: The color blind one. Cuz, I once heard that they get confused by the colors....... Tom: We know Mike, we were there. > Greg asked. He knew the Negaverse for he was a >Shadow Warrior for their side. Amy helped free him after Zoysite captured a >crystal from his body Tom: Swedish armpit crystal? > that made him a monster and now, Greg was normal. Tom: Oh, you mean normal for a mind reading wiener that hangs out with the Sailor Scouts and used to be part of the Negaverse. > "Wiseman, he was very tough. Crow: When my bubbles didn't faze him, I knew we were screwed. > But Alyssa is starting to get tough too." Mike: Oh, she's real tough and stringy don'tcha know. >Amy said, putting her face on Greg's shoulder. Mike and Tom: Fore! > They sat down on a bench, >not caring that it would be morning. Tom: Come on Amy, let's wave our hands in the air like we don't care! > Amy's mom was at a doctor's conference >in Germany and Greg's parents worked the night shift. Mike: Here's the setup...... > That was why they >were out at 5 in the morning. Tom: Well that and the Early Bird Special. > "Amy, I love you. I've been having...." Crow: This recurring nightmare that we were trapped in a horrible Superman/Sailor Moon/Xena/Hercules lemon/crossover......AHHHHHHH!!!!! > Greg blushed heavily. Tom: He needs to put that blush on a diet. > "Greg? What is it, you are blushing." Amy smiled. > "I love seeing you as Sailor Mercury. Mike: I got the blues, so bad. > I..." That was so embarrassing to >Greg to say what he really thought of Amy. He spent some time in America >and learned a lot about teenaged sex. Tom: What with America being the only place they do it and all. > He was having strong feelings Mike: INTENSE feelings. > for >Amy, sexual feelings. Greg was deeply embarrassed, Crow: Why does Darren have to make me such a hentai?! > he really loved Amy but >when she was Sailor Mercury in that short skirt, it made him wish she could >take it off, reveal her naked body. Tom: Just watch some transformation sequences, that'll hold ya. > Greg was shocked, did he think that of >his beloved Amy? Did he see her naked when he saw her? American teenaged >sex was indeed very serious Mike: Well, it's a pretty complex issue, but what about *Japanese* teenaged sex? I mean, they are Japanese right? Crow: Well, they're using American names... Tom: Well, the school's name is Japanese, and they're definitely in Tokyo, therefore they are Japanese. Crow: So why's he using the dub names? > to Greg and he didn't want to offend Amy or make >her mad he thought feelings like that. > "Greg, I love you. You can tell me anything, I won't get mad. Mike: No Greg, don't fall for it! Tom: Speaking from experience Mike? Mike: Uh, no of course not. > I'm very >honored you love me as Sailor Mercury." Amy smiled. > "I love your dress, Crow: Blue is definitely your color girlfriend, but you really should lose the tiara. > as Mercury. That short skirt...well...it makes me >want to." Greg said, blushing. Crow: Want to? Want to what?! Details man! > Amy blushed too, she knew what he referred to! She heard it in Crossroads >Juuban High School, teenaged girls getting it on. Tom: That's a pretty crude way of saying it. > But she smiled at Greg, >it was ok he thought that of her. IT assured her that she was developing >right Mike: She had good focus, and the lighting was superb. > and he was curious. "It's ok to think sexual thoughts about me. I >got a big secret too." she whispered, blushing big. Crow: I'm huge! > "What, Amy?" Tom: That Amy. The blue-haired one. > Greg asked. > "Well, never tell anyone." Amy said seriously. > "I swear." Greg promised. > Amy took a deep breath and Mike: Wheezed. > giggled. "It's so silly, but I think about it. Crow: What? Tom: It. Crow: Oh, *that*. >We were at my house, alone. Tom: Well, he's a quick learner, isn't he? > I danced as Sailor Mercury and I..." she >giggled again. "I got nude! I actually got nude for you." Mike: Wow, wish I weren't so stoned at the time....... Crow: You're dancin' like you're naked...... > "Whoa! We must never tell anyone." Crow: Or write about it either. > Greg blushed, feeling his dick get very >hard. Mike: I didn't need to know that, ok?! > "Don't be embarrassed, Tom: Be mortified! > it's only a fantasy. Mike: It's sick and twisted and I'm very proud of it. > It's ok to think of me being >naked, Crow: I do it all the time! > I am glad you got it out in the open, Tom: Whoa, zip it up Greg! > it shows you really love me to >talk about this instead of...taking advantage of me." Mike: Thank you for not taking advantage of me like the author has! > Amy said, hugging him. > "I'd never touch you unless you wanted me too. Crow: Do ya want me to? > That's why I had to tell >you." Greg said seriously. > "I am so proud of you. Tom: You figured out how to tie your shoes all by yourself! > When I am ready for sex, I promise I will be Mike: Out of this fanfic. > just >as beautiful as Sailor Mercury." Crow: Oh, that'll be tough. Tom: I'll bet she has a wig and everything. > Amy smiled. Tom: Ever notice how she does that a lot? > "Thanks, Amy. I do wish we did have sex. I will always wish one day, you >got naked and danced for me." Mike: She just said she did! Geez...... > Greg smiled, kissing Amy and walking her home. > Amy giggled. Tom: I'm giggling like a school girl! Tee hee! > That's one wish that won't come true, though she felt a bit >tingly at the thought of being Sailor Mercury and being very naughty. Crow: Betcha her and Alyssa hit it off. Tom: But she's not weird. Crow: Noooooo....... > "We >are silly kids, Greg. Here I am 16 years old and thinking of sex. Mike: Hmmmm, 16 years old.......thinks about sex.....so what's weird about that? Crow: I think Darren's trying to tell us something. > What a >weird night." Tom: Hope I killed enough brain cells to forget it in the morning. > "Ah, but it's just started kids. Amy Mizuno, you have your little >fantasy, bad girl." the voice said, laughing. Crow: BWAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA........hic! > > "Morning, sunshine." Mike: Morning rock, morning moon, morning grass........ > Ken Mills smiled at his new girlfriend, Lita. Ken >was Lita's longtime boyfriend Tom: So he's her old boyfriend? Crow: Well, that takes care of that old pickup line. Mike: He looks just like my current boyfriend! > and now, he had the honor of being her >roommate. Tom: I'd be honored too! Rrrrowwwwwrrrr........ > Though they slept in separate rooms, Ken always greeted Lita >Makoto with a big > smile Crow: Whew! Mike: You're never fully dressed without a smile! > as she woke up in her bed. Ken also shared the >secrets of everyone else on Sailor Moon and her friends, even Rini. Mike: They don't seem to have grasped the concept of secret identities have they? > He kept >it quiet though. Tom: Yeah, he only told his family and closest friends. Oh, and Linda Trip. > It was an honor to see Lita as Sailor Jupiter, Crow: He's very honored isn't he? > she was a >very good fighter and friend to anyone. Mike: Even Christopher Walken? Crow: Hello. > Lita took him in after hearing his >parents died All: Of mysterious causes. > and he'd be shipped away to a foster home. Lita promised to >take good care of him, Crow: IfyouknowwhatImean! > and she did, or he did rather. Tom: Say wha? > Ken was a good cook Mike: He has a way with plastic food, I'll give him that. >as she was. Ken smiled as Lita had on her favorite green Jupiter nightshirt Tom: Gee, Lita kinda looks like Sailor Jupiter don't she? Crow: Nah, it's your imagination. >she bought in New York, home to her best friends Clark Kent and Lois Lane. > "Morning, Ken." Crow: Hello Barbie! ......Oops. > Lita smiled, stretching and getting out of bed, pulling >her shirt down so Ken wouldn't see her naked. Bots: Damn! > Lita wasn't ready for sex yet >and didn't want Ken to get any wrong ideas of her sleeping habits. "I hope >I didn't wake you up this morning." Tom: Nah, I slept right through all that moaning coming from your room last night. *yawn* What were you doing in there anyway? > "It's ok, I had a haunch Crow: What, they're at a Ren Fest now? > Jupiter was needed." Ken smiled, kissing her. > "That is so sad, your family dying like that." Mike: Yeah......sad. > "I'm getting over it. I have a nice dedicated girlfriend. A pretty, >tall, sexy, girlfriend." Tom: Who needs family when I can shag you? > Ken blushed, he could almost make out her anatomy >in that beautiful shirt. Crow: And what a shirt! Round, firm, and fully packed! > He had a feeling Lita was totally nude under that >shirt for he saw the outline of her nipples peeking out. Mike: Peekaboo! > Boy, he wished >that shirt was at least 8 more inches higher so he can see that beautiful >nude body. Tom: Yeah, that's telling yourself. >"Lita...I'm thinking those thoughts again. Crow: Must be punished! > It's so hard... Tom: You wish! > watching you keep >covered. I wish.." Mike: I wish I was a couple feet taller. Crow: I wish I weren't plastic. Tom: I wish I could bend at the waist! > "Ken, are you thinking of sex again?" Lita smiled gently. > "I'm sorry...you are so pretty. If only..no, I understand. Mike: Uh oh. He's losing it. Tom: Run Lita! While you still can! > I have a >condom, Crow: And don't know how to use it! > but I do respect you." Ken stammered badly, Mike: Uh, no. He didn't. > feeling embarrassed. He >hoped Lita wasn't embarrassed. Tom: I don't care, and I'm embarrassed for you. > "Thanks, Ken. I'm glad you respect me. Crow: R-E-S-P-E-C-T, find out what it means to me. > I've heard sex is so tempting to >all girls. I just need more time, Ken." Lita smiled, kissing him again. Tom: Again? When did she kiss him earlier? > "It's ok, I wish I could watch you change." Crow: I believe he said the magic woid. > "Ooooh, I see I have some horny girls in Lita and Amy. Mike: But that wasn’t Lita’s wish.... > Your wish is granted." Tom: ALAKAZAM! > "Huh?" Ken asked, He heard a strange voice! > "Ken, are you ok?" Crow: Sybil says yes. > Lita smiled. > "I'll go set the table, I'm fine." Ken said. Mike: Must...kill...the voices! > "Ken...don't you want to watch me get dressed?" Lita asked, grinning big. Tom: Then the top of her head fell off and rolled across the floor....... >She actually lifted her shirt, revealing the beautiful pussy Ken had always >wanted to see. Mike: Yea, I really like Garfield! > "Here...touch it." Crow: Wow! Scratch and sniff! Mike: Crow! Tom: Hey, I got lemon! > Lita smiled, going over to him. Was this a dream, her >mind wondered. Mike: Geez, pick a tense man! > Ken touched it. "Wow! It's wet!" he said happily. Tom: But......why does my hand feel like it's on fire? > "I've been thinking bad thoughts. Crow: Nah, we've had enough Alyssa/spanking jokes. > I've been thinking of getting a >spanking." > Lita teased as she took off her shirt and turned around, bending >over so Ken could see her entire bottom. Crow: The whole thing? Wow. > "Lita." Ken sighed as he actually stuck his finger in Lita's bottom. Mike: Don't mind me, just checking your oil. > Lita >began to moan happily as he stuck it up far. Mike: Ewww.... > "Ken...yes. Yes." Lita said, feeling very horny. She felt so great as >Ken began to make his way to her clit and rubbed it. Crow: It took my hand 12 days by camel and we lost 3 men, but it finally got there....... > "Oh, Ken. I wish you >were naked too." Tom: I'm so bummed out from this lemon I could use a good laugh. Mike: Ooh, ouch! > "Your wish is granted." Crow: ALAKAZAM! > "Huh?" Lita asked, blushing very big. Mike: Now I'm huge! > Who said that? But she saw Ken was >getting naked, and his dick ..it was so big! Tom: At least he isn't throwing impossible measurements at us. Crow: Thank god for _small_ favors. > Lita eagerly grabbed his condom >and putted it on. Crow: Um........aren't I supposed to be wearing that? > "Give me that Supreme Patriotism!" Crow: Give me that Roman Candle! Tom: Thanks Crow, that image will be running around in my head all day long! Mike: This...is goofy. > Lita ordered, bending down on her bed >and holding on to the frame. She eagerly lifted her leg Mike: Uh oh, time to take Lita for a walkie....... > up as Ken began to >erect his condom in her! Mike: I'm pitchin' tents! Whoo! > "Yes! Yes! Yes!" All: No no no!! > Lita screamed with delight as Ken Mike: Clutched his chest and fell to the ground...... Tom: Stop stealing my lines Mike. >played with her pussy, then gave her a spanking on her behind. Tom: Well, where else would he spank her? Crow: Don't go there. > Then she >began feeling wet and juicy as Lita felt the biggest orgasm ever! All: Wha wha whaaaaaaa........... > Sex was >indeed great as they soon ran to the kitchen and got on the table! Mike: Wow, she sure recovered quick! Tom: Well, it was only the BIGGEST ORGASM EVER!!!! Crow: . Mike and the bots run onto the bridge wearing jogging outfits and panting. “Alright guys, a couple more laps, then we move onto pushups!” Mike said as he jogged in place. “Mike, why are we doing this?” Crow whined from the place he had fallen on the ground. “Yeah, me and Crow prefer 'mental' preparation....huff....” Tom puffed from beside Crow. His head had been completely repaired. “Come on guys, you gotta admit the fanfic's the farthest thing from your mind right now.” Tom thought a bit before replying. “Yup, that's true.” “Mike, I can't feel my legs.....” Crow moaned from his spot on the floor. “Great, now you're feeling the burn!” Mike said with all the compassion of a normal phys-ed teacher. “Gypsy, can we have some water out here?” Gypsy stuck her head out and said ,”Just a minute Mike!” The usual alarms and buzzers went off, signaling the guys return to the theater. “Um, next time Gypsy! Right now WE GOT LEMON SIGN!” Mike yelled as the standard pandemonium ensued. 6..5..4..3..2..1..* Mike: You guys feeling better now? Crow: Yeah, but I'm never going to do that again, you got me Nelson? Mike: Ok ok. > > Raye felt very sore Tom: Damn, don't tell me we missed it! > as she took off her nightshirt, revealing her beautiful >16 year old nudity. Mike: If you watch closely, you'll notice the Nudity in it's natural habitat. > Raye smiled at her reflection...her chest was perfect Crow: No modesty here I see. >and her pussy...whoever the lucky guy was, was sure to be on fire Tom: Isn't that kinda harsh? Why don't you just turn him into a deer or something? Mike: Wrong deity Tom. > as it was >red haired. Crow: So.......guess you might say Raye is a redhead! Mike: I don't think so. > Then Raye saw a slight bulge on her back. Mike: Well, that's a weird place for it... Crow: For what? Mike: Er......nothing. Tom: Maybe she's a Guyver? > "Great, I popped a disk, no wonder I hurt! Tom: Yeah, that might be the problem. > That monster must've pounded >me! Crow: Anybody else think that was pretty dirty? Mike and Tom: Yes. > Darn!" Raye said, slightly bent over. Mike: Now, that's what I call a compromising position. Tom: Especially in a lemon. > "I wish someone rubbed my back." > "Your wish is granted." Tom: Hanz? Franz? Your two o'clock is here. > Raye got angry and embarrassed Crow: Then she got pissed. > as she putted Mike: Fore! Crow: Ooh, she's landed just short of the green...... Tom: I wonder if Oscar and Darren are related? > her night shirt over the >front of her body. "All right, who invades my room? Tom: Who dares invade Poland?! > Show yourself to me!" > "Oh, Raye. Don't you think you need a robe or would you fight naked? Crow: Well, Serena doesn't anyway. > ha >ha ha ha ha." All: Ha ha ha. > the voice chided her. Raye felt her shirt being dropped by >the wind Mike: When the summer wind.....comes blowing in....... > and as she bent over, her back went totally out, leaving her in a >bad position all naked. Tom: This position's indefensible! > "Raye, are you ok?" Crow: Oh, I'm fine......just cracking walnuts....... > Chad asked, blushing a bit as Raye was totally naked. Mike: Totally? Tom: Like, fer sure! > "Chad?! You get out of my room or I'll tell Grandpa! Tom: Better not, he might take pictures. > Go away! You violated my privacy! Ooooh." Raye screamed, Mike: I wouldn't call that a scream exactly.....more like a moan. Crow: Hey, way to go Chad! Tom: I'll say this for the kid, he moves fast. > couldn't even moving. Tom: Well I can see how--wha? > She got scared of >her back, Crow: Why's it following me?! Stay away!! > she had to be 100% healthy to be Sailor Mars!! Worse of all, Chad >saw her naked! Mike: I'm gonna poke out your eyes and burn them in my ceremonial fires!! Crow: It was worth it! > "I'll help you, I read of being a chiropractor. Tom: Yeah, reading a book from the bus stop is better than 8 years of college! Mike: Time to go to the chiropractor...... > Let me help." Crow: Lean on me....when you're not strong...... > "Get away! Don't touch me or I'll tell!" Mike: Yeah, you go girl! > Raye screamed from her stuck >position as Chad picked her up as if she was an animal. Tom: So Chad's into bestiality? Crow: The more I think about it, the more Oscar and Darren being related makes sense. > Then he laid her on >her bed, her bottom sticking up. Mike: Bottom's Up! > Chad gently lowered her down as he putted a >towel on her bare behind Crow: Oh, that shot's easy, but can he beat the windmill? > to cover it as he began to rub her back. Tom: Why's he covering her up? He's seen all there is to see! Mike: Maybe it's in case Gramps drops by..... Crow: Hello the--Oh my god! > Raye >actually felt very guilty, thinking Chad would touch her! Mike: Well he is, isn't he? > All he did was >touch her lower back, that was it. Crow: At least that's what his lawyers said. > Then, Raye noticed something different Tom: Uh, Chad? What are you going to do with that sledgehammer? Crow: Don't worry, this'll only hurt for a second. Don't move...... >about Chad as she saw him in her big mirror rubbing her back...he shaved his >beard! She could see he cut his hair and revealed two gorgeous eyes smiling >at her! He looked handsome! Mike: Wow, that never happens to me when I shave... Crow: It's gotta be the shaving cream. > I am nude, Chad is rubbing my back, he looks >handsome, what is going on? Is this a weird dream?> Tom: Nah, it's just another lemon, go back to sleep. > Raye wondered as she >blushed big from being naked. Crow: You know, these are the most bashful kids I've ever seen in a lemon. > Raye felt her body was like a temple Mike: Cuz she's a priestess and all. Bots: Oh we owe, oh owe. Oh we owe, oh owe. > and only >her girl friends were allowed to see her naked, not a boy! Tom: The infidel has cooties! Mike: I, Raye Hino, the Blue Thunder of Juuban High, shall smite thee! > But Raye >felt...relaxed as Chad touched her. Crow: Yeah, you don't want a massage that makes you tense up. > She actually felt good as he rubbed the >muscles in her back, making the soreness go away. Raye felt a sexual >thought enter her mind now, and blushed at it! Mike: Oh, you naughty thought you! > She almost asked out loud to >get a frontal Tom: Lobotomy? > rub Tom: Oh damn. > on her pussy, but kept her mouth shut, fearful Crow: I'm so ascared! > that the >evil mysterious voice may have her do something she didn't want to, like Mike: Dance for the money they'd throw? Crow: Watch Those Obnoxious Aliens? Tom: Have sex? >have sex. Tom: What can I say? It's a gift! Crow: More like a curse. > Raye did think about it, she loved Sex-Ed Crow: Obviously, Darren has never taken that class. > and it was fascinating >to learn how she was born since her family never talked sex at all with >her... Mike: Well, considering that you're a virginal temple maiden might have something to do with it. >her Grandpa was way too old and prone for a heart attack. Tom: It's official, we're going with the kindly American Grandpa! Mike and Crow: Yay. > Raye vowed >not to end up like a dirty girl, Crow: But that's just going to get throw out the window in this story. > doing all sorts of weird stuff. Mike: Like the Macarena? > "Now, I gotta pull you back." Chad said as he putted a knee on Raye's >bottom and pulled her back like a surf board. Tom: You mean, he pulled her until she was flat, long, and waterproof? Crow: Dude, I needed a new board! Surf's up! > Raye felt a loud snap, Crow: That's one loud snap! Tom: Loudest one I've ever *heard*. > as if >the disc popped back in place. Sure enough, Raye felt her back move when >Chad set her down. > "Now, stand. I won't look." Tom: Much. > Chad promised. He covered his eyes as Raye >stood up, wrapping the large towel Chad setted on her bottom around her nude >body. Tom: We know about the nude part already, thank you very much. > "Chad...how?" Crow: Better yet, why? > Raye whispered happily, bending down to touch her toes as >she always did in the morning. Her back was all better! Mike: They do a lot of bending and stretching in this lemon don't they? Tom: Yes, they're very limber. > "That book you bought back from New York on back problems fascinated me, Tom: I particularly liked the illustrations! > I >knew what to do when I saw you hurt. I'm sorry I saw you nude." Crow: Not to sorry I hope. Tom: Sorry, so sorry...... > Chad said gently. > "Oh Chad...I shouldn't be upset you saw me nude, that was my fault for not >putting on my robes. Don't tell anyone though, especially Serena!" Raye >said, blushing very big. Mike: How do you blush big anyway? Crow: I dunno, maybe it's a cartoon thing. > Just then, her grandfather popped his head in the >door when he saw Raye kiss Chad! > "Raye, no dating until you're 16!" Grandpa Hino yelled. Tom: You know, they kinda remind me of Marrissa and Jean Luc.... Mike: Didn't she go out with Darien for a while there? > "Oh Grandpa, I wish you'd let me date already! I am 16!" Raye argued, and >she was after all, 16 years old! Crow: And she has the fake id's to prove it! > "Gee...you're right." Grandpa Hino now said softly. Mike: Unfortunately for Chad, they didn't notice his big stick...... Crow: Mike, that's sick! I like it! > Raye was shocked, Tom: So are we! Crow: Yeah, who knew her Grandpa was into cattle prods? Mike: ..... > her >grandfather was now calm! Crow: Unless he's one of those people that speak softly when they're pissed. Tom: Oh, yeah. Gotta watch out for them. > "You are 16, and I am sorry I kept you from >dating. I've seen how people date and they end up hurt. Mike: How would he know this? He's a freaking monk for God's sake! Tom: I'd just like to point out that we don't know all that much about the Shinto religion and what it let's it monks get away with. Thank you. > I only care to see >you happy, Raye, I don't want to see you get hurt, honey." All: Awwwww....... > This was too weird Tom: You said it. > for Raye...Chad was nice, now her grandfather...and >that voice! Who was it that said her wish was true. Crow: The voice did, pay attention to yourself! > Did this voice grant >these wishes like that Genie in Aladdin? Mike: No, Disney isn't this depraved. > Was there such a thing as Genies? > "Actually, Raye, I am scared when you go out of this temple. I get lonely >at times watching you growing up and pulling away from me. Crow: A little Polydent'll take care of that for ya. > I sometimes want >to keep you as a little girl forever. Now, I have to learn that you are >indeed 16 and you have the right to date. Tom: And let's not forget the most righteous right of all! The right to party! > Please forgive me, you can go out >on dates anytime you want." Grandpa said softly, bowing down to Raye in the >custom Japanese custom of apology. Mike: Wow, that was actually pretty good. Crow: Don't expect that to happen anymore. > Raye bowed back and accepted. Crow: Accepted what? > She got down on her knees Crow: Oh, I getcha! Wink wink, nudge nudge, say no more. > and hugged her 3 >foot tall grandfather. Tom: So.....what do you know about Lilliputians? Mike: Huh? Tom: Oh, sorry. Just making small talk. > She was glad he now accepted her as being an >independent woman, but what brought that on? Mike: A better question is what brought this lemon on. > Could someone be reading her >mind, and who was it? Crow: Enquiring minds wanna know. > > Mina sighed as she saw her old pal Superman, who was her best pal Clark >Kent, saved Metropolis again. Tom: Oh good, the drugs are.......kicking......innnnnnnnn...... > Lately, the Dark Moon Mike: Isn't a Dark Moon really a New Moon? > was trying a 1-2 punch Crow: 1 part fruit juice, 2 parts vodka. >to get rid of Serena, they were trying to get rid of Superman so he couldn't >save her, but Superman outfoughted Tom: Hey, if you have a double past tense, does it cancel out? Mike: No, it just looks really stupid. > every plot they had to get her or Rini. >Superman told the reporters that he will not stop until Queen Alyssa is >found and brought to justice by Sailor Moon. Mike: Oh, so Superman does all the work and Serena get's the credit? I see how it is..... > If she needed help, Superman >will help in anyway. Crow: Here, have another helpin' sonny. > "Boy, Clark has been busy. Tom: What with saving the world and all. > Alyssa has really layed down the heavy armor. Crow: I don't think that's all she's been laying, if you know what I mean! Mike: Crow..... >It's a good thing Superman's solid punch disintegrates the droids." Mike: Yeah, solid. > Artemis >commented. > "Yeah. Oh, there's Lois talking to him!" Mina sighed Tom: Hurricane Mina was sighted off the coast of Metropolis earlier this morning with wind speeds up to 100 mph. > as Superman gave a >statement to his wife and actually said hi to his best friend Clark Kent, Crow: So, I grabbed some lead off the nearest car and wrapped the kryptonite in it, right? And then I started...Oh, could you say hi to Clark for me? I *really* miss him. >referring to himself unknown to the other people. Mike: Well duh. Tom: The day I meet someone who doesn't know Superman's secret identity is the day I shave my head and join a monastery. Crow: But you don't have hair. Tom: Exactly. > Lois smiled at Superman's >kind statement, she knew what he meant. Tom: And she's still smiling? > Mina sure missed them. Crow: So she let someone else shoot at them a while. > Alyssa sent >down an evil warrior named Tempest who was a time traveler like the Wiseman >was. Tempest sent Lois to an alternative world of Metropolis where to >Mina's surprise, there was an alternative Sailor Moon Mike: Alternative meaning her lifestyle. > and the Scouts with >Clark Kent. Crow: Whoohooo! Orgy! Tom: They just happened to drop in on him from Japan? And why's there two Mina's? > OF course, the girls had to be reminded who they were, Mina >thought that was so cool, meeting herself who shared the same name as her Mike: Mina, meet Mina. >and seeing the birth of Superman. Tempest came back a second time just >after Galaxia was turned good, this time he trapped Superman, Sailor Moon, >and Tuxedo Mask in his magical mirror, Tom: Yes! Crow: Wow, you can actually hear reality warping. > sending them through a time vortex. >Mina could never forget the look on Rini and Raye's face, Crow: So they share face's now. Ok............ > how the girls were >heart broken and fearful they'd never come back. That was when HG Wells, Mike: Hey, don't bring a real writer into this! >Lois and Clark's time traveler friend, helped by bringing back Serena and >Rini from the alternate Metropolis to help battle Alyssa's warriors and >then...she, Mars, and Chibi Moon all took a fascinating trip Mike: Oh, now it's Gilligan's Senshi. > in the world of >time as Mars shot 4 flame arrows and Venus used her old Love Chain Encircle >to tie it on the arrows to stop the flying box that had Superman, Sailor >Moon, and Tuxedo Mask on it. Tom: Periods! Use them! > It was so cool Crow: No, not really. > how Ultra Woman held the two >girls tightly Crow: Whoa! > as they stopped the flying box. Mike: The Luggage grew wings? > She never seen Rini so happy Mike: She hasn't been the same since ChibiUsa Loses Her Virginity........ >to get her real mom back, and it was so funny Tom: You might even say hilarious. Crow: I wouldn't. > how she and Rini thwarted >Tempus' plan to expose the alternate Serena Crow: Expose her to what? Kryptonite? Tom: Kryptonite doesn't compare with the debilitating affects of this lemon. > and Rini as being Sailor Moon >and Chibi Moon. Served him right when they threw him in the nut house. Mike: Anybody that attacks people with flying boxes has to be a little loopy. Tom: Yeah, he'll be drugged and put in a padded cell where the orderlies'll whale on him all day, but it serves him right. Crow: The Riddler seemed to enjoy it. > "I wish I could be like Superman and have Bobby Benton fall for me." Mina >sighed. Tom: Well, that was a bizarre interlude...... Crow: Even I don't wanna think about it, so let's move along. > "Your wish has been granted." Crow: So either she's Superman, or some guy named Bobby Benton fell for her. Or is it both? Tom: Try not to think about it. > "Huh?" Mina exclaimed as Artemis had to duck! Mike: Whoa, watch those exclamation points! > "Whoa! Be careful with that arm!" he exclaimed. Crow: Now that's how you exclaim. I hope Mina's taking notes. > "I heard a voice! He said my wish was granted!" Mina said, wondering who >said that. Tom: The voice did, pay attention to yourself! > "That's the commercial for that Tokyo Home Savings Bank they just opened. >It said, your wish for a loan has been granted." Artemis told her. Mike: Japanese commercials in Metropolis? Crow: Maybe it's a Satellite tv. Tom: Or maybe, Darren forgot what country Metropolis is in. > Mina was so sure someone said her wish came true. > > "Morning, Mommy, we slept nude." Mike: Damn..........time to lay off the cough syrup....... > Rini giggled. Her face was right on >Serena's bare breast, Tom: Ewwww.......drool! > her little pussy right on top of Serena's. Crow: That's probably the worst way to tell if Rini's a bed wetter. > Rini had >never felt so relaxed as she stroked Serena's breast. Mike: Ah, the breast stroke. Crow: I hope Serena doesn't teach her the dog paddle. > "Hmmm, I must've been so tired. You are so light, you didn't even move." >Serena smiled, pulling Rini up so she can give her a big kiss on the cheek. Tom: Freud would have a field day with these two. > "You were tired. Crow: Please don't tell us why. > Let's go see Darien and Chad." Mike: Let's spread the loathing! > Rini smiled, getting off >of Serena so she can get up. Tom: Getting off to get up? Now that sounds like Serena's usual...... Mike: Watch the plugs guys. > Serena smiled as she watched Rini walk, she >was so pretty with her little bottom wiggling. Crow: J-E-L-L-O. > Rini went over to Serena's >closet that she proudly shared. Mike: Hmmmmm.......leather, leather, leather, leather.......ah! Spandex! Crow: Ick, Mike. > Rini got to sleep with Serena every night, >and it made her happy. Tom: So did the drugs. > They were like mother and daughter, Crow: No, they are mother and daughter, which makes their little love scene even sicker. > which they were. Crow: Er, yeah. >Rini loved sharing things with Serena. Mike: We already know they like sharing the pain. > She shared the closet, the baths, >some clothes that fitted her, Serena's old clothes, Tom: The wands.......... > and Rini's favorite part >was shaving their legs together. Tom: What does that have to do with sharing? Mike: I bet he threw that in there just to screw with our minds. > Today, they were going to shave. Crow: --their heads and join the Aryan nation. Tom: They can have 'em. Mike: Guys..... > Rini >picked out a short skirt for Serena and her favorite overall red striped >skirt and a white blouse. Serena was so pleased as she looked over the skirt. Tom: What, Serena's school has a Topless Friday policy? Crow: Sounds like fun, where do I enroll? > "Ooooh, Darien's favorite. You knew what I wanted." she squealed. Crow: She's a squealer? > "And I have Chad's favorite so he can see my legs. I need to shave >today." Rini smiled big. Mike: Just take a little off the top. > Serena picked her up. "We sure will, we will be drop dead sexy! Tom: Hopefully, they'll just be dead. > I hope we >have peace today, though." Mike: Ooh looky, he's using foreshadowing! > "I hope so, Mommy. I want to be with you all day." Rini smiled as the >girls went in the bathroom to start shaving Crow: The ice. > their legs. > > "Morning, Darien." Chad smiled at his roommate. > "Morning, Chad." Darien said, getting up. Crow: Morning voice. > "Rough night with Alyssa?" he asked. Tom: Yeah, I tried to tell her to clip her finger nails, but she just doesn't listen. > "The worse." Darien said. > "You'll beat her." Crow: Wanna borrow my bull whip? > Chad smiled as he went over to his art work. Darien >smiled, everytime Chad got up, Mike: He got off? > he went over to stare at his paintings of >Rini. Tom: What is he going to do, challenge it to a staring contest? > Chad was practicing to be an artist, and he loved to paint Rini. Mike: Well, there goes his career. Crow: That was quick. > He >had many photos of her... Crow: And he'll sell them back to her for a tidy sum of cash. > Rini in her pants, shorts, dresses, walks in the >park, her and Serena, her and Sailor Moon, Chibi Moon striking a cute >pose...everything he could think of. Tom: No nude pics? Yes! Mike and Crow: Alleluia! > Darien didn't mind the crowding of >framed photos on the wall, he had many photos of Serena that cluttered his >dresser. Mike: Several of which had her in compromising positions with a certain pink-haired girl. > "You draw Rini well. Tom: It's as if you know her body. > That is so life like." Darien smiled, looking at the >big smile Crow: And nothing else. > on Rini's face when she reunited with Serena as the lovable 14 >year old girl she was today. Mike: Serena's 14? > There were some with Rini when she was 8 and >12, the two other times she was there. "You draw as good as she does." Tom: I particularly like this one of Elvis. Velvet is so...smoooooooth. Crow: And the way you drew the bulldog with the ace up his sleeve...marvelous! > "Yeah, she is pretty. Crow: What does that have to do with her painting ability? > I do have a secret." Chad said, blushing. Mike: Can I shag your underage child? D'oh!! > "Whoa, must be big." Tom: But probably isn't. > Darien smiled at Chad's blushing. Crow: Now, time to close in for the kill......... > "Well...you told me Serena was nude after Galaxia and you held her." Chad >stammered. "Well, I enjoyed seeing that wonderful movie "Great >Expectations," Tom: And those two things are related how? Mike: Well, actually, I enjoyed seeing that wonderful commercial for the movie. > where the guy painted his love nude. I...want to paint Rini >nude. Don't be mad, it's just a thought." Mike: Dude, I got a headache.... Crow: And yes folks, he got all of that from just the commercial! > "No...that is a very big photo you want to do of my daughter...nude." Crow: No, it's a painting. >Darien said, a small smile forming. IF her mother looked beautiful nude, >Rini would look beautiful too. Tom: Why's Darien thinking about his daughter nude? Mike: Step away Tom, that way lies madness. > Rini was very shy over showing her body >undressed to Darien, Mike: Thank you. > only Serena was allowed to see her nude, which didn't >bother Darien. Bikinis, yes. Nudity, no. Crow: There is a God! > "Not as sex, Darien. I want to do it artistically. I'd never touch her." >Chad assured him. Tom: You're lying through your teeth! > "It's ok with me, but you have to ask Serena and Rini. I know...if Rini >feels shy about this, invite Serena over. She'd be willing to do that Crow: Just call her meatball head, then she'll be putty in your hands. > ...and >even I would like a photo of her nude and being artful as she was that night >when I came back to her." Darien smiled wistfully. Mike: Oh, I get it. Darren thinks art is a euphemism for sex. Crow: Well...neat. Tom: Guess old Darren hasn't heard about pornography. > "I'll make her very beautiful." Chad promised. > > Serena smiled as Rini just told her a very big fantasy. "You want Chad to >paint you in your little bikini?" she squealed happily. Tom: Ah, the time honored art of contrivance. > Rini nodded big. Crow: I zee you have a fization on ze word big. > "Great Expectations was a good movie, Mike: Uh, you mean the commercial was good. Tom: Let it go, man. > but I'm not ready >to be painted nude. Tom: Thank you. > I thought I'd make him happy being Semi Nude. I got >the G-string...where my butt is showing." Rini giggled, referring to her >thong bikini. Crow: Nope, doesn't do a thing for me. Tom: I'll take your word for it. > "Well, you'll be close to nude. Mike: In fact, you're nearly there. > You can pose nude if you feel ready, only >for paint art now. The law would throw a fit to see a photo of you nude, Tom: Somehow, I bet they'll overlook it. Crow: They oughta be worried more about that little incest thingie. >and my Dad would be on the war path for sure." Crow: Oh, get real! Shivo'll probably pull a plot device outta nowhere and everything'll be hunky dory. > Serena said, knowing how >upset her father would be to see Rini nude, Mike: With good reason! > though it was a painting, not a >photograph. Tom: What's the difference? Mike: A picture catches the physical representation of a scene, a painting catches it's essence. Tom: Thank you Aristotle. > "I'm sorry your legs got cut. Crow: Ah, she has the sincerity of Tonya Harding. > That was strange that your brooch has not >healed them." Rini said, seeing at least 8 little Band-Aids on each leg. Mike: Duh, I counted. Crow: 1..2..3..4.. Tom: Bored? > "I'm ok. Maybe my brooch needs to be recharged more. I did use it a >lot." Serena said. Tom: That's the last time I give Darien a jumpstart. > "Hug." Rini smiled, opening her arms. Crow: I'd comment, but I like living. Mike: Wise choice my friend. > Serena lifted the teenaged girl up with ease. Mike: Welcome back to the Sailor Scout Clean and Jerk. Tom: Ooh, nice form on that Senshi... Crow: I'll say. > Serena loved picking Rini >up, Tom: The Woody Allen of anime. > it made her so happy to be held tight like that. Crow: Tighter, tighter, tighter! > Serena was 5 foot 11, >Rini was 4 foot 6. Mike: Better write that down, I'm sure it'll be important later. Tom: I hope you're being sarcastic. > "I love hugging you like this." Serena sighed. Tom: Long sigh. > "Me too. I love you lots" Crow: I love you more than I love Ovalteen! > Rini said, squeezing her tight. Tom: She squeezed until Serena's head flew off in a fountain of blood and gore..... > Then Serena >setted her down. > "You know, my parents took Sammy camping. Crow: Here's the setup......... Tom: That has to be one of the lamest reasons for a lemon I have ever heard. Mike: It's a lot better than 'Suddenly they were attacked by vampires.' Tom: Yeah, you got me there. > That was great of them, leaving >us home alone." Serena smiled. Tom: We're Home Alone! WHAAAAAAAAAAAAA!!!!!! Crow: Don't do that! > "Yeah, we get to be mother and daughter. Crow: But haven't they......weren't they? Mike: Deep breaths, Crow. > Yaaay. Mike: Huzzah. > I feel like a slumber >party, sleepware optional." Tom: Yup, they're still using that old setup. Crow: S'ok with me. Mike: What about heavy artillery? > Rini giggled. Crow: Inanely. > She loved no sleepware at all >where they'd talk more of sex and how to use the protection. Rini knew she >was a healthy virgin, so was Serena. Both girls had condoms ready if their >boyfriends wanted it, but wanted to wait until they were 18 for that magical >moment. Still, the thought of their fantasies, and how they'd do it. Crow: Then, when all's said and done, the orgy! > "I bet you want to touch my anatomy again, right?" Serena teased. Tom: So that's what you call it these days! Mike: Damn, I never did like biology. > "I want to rub it again. You were really going good." Rini giggled, >remembering how Serena had a big orgasm when Rini rubbed her and never >stopped, Mike: So she's still doing it? > even when the juices bursted out, Tom: Hey, the juice got loose. > right on Rini's little pussy. >Rini loved that shot, Tom: To the head. > that was cool how Serena even cleaned her up. Mike: Nobody...does it like youuuuu... Tom: She sucks like an Electrolux. > "Maybe I will." Serena said coyly as Rini giggled. She'll give in. Crow: Nothing beats a horny lemon writer. Tom: Well, at least in his fanfics anyway. > "Actually, I have a little wish." Tom: Here it comes. > "What, Mommy?" "Well..." Serena blushed. "I wish to be alone with Darien, in my room. >That way, Daddy won't be nosing around, thinking we were having sex. Crow: Gee, what a brilliant plan! Of course he won't mind if Darien is alone with you, I'm surprised I didn't think of it myself! > I do >need his help with Algebra, History, and Chemistry." Mike: They don't call me a ditz for nothing. > "You know, I wish Chad would paint me today in my bikini. NOw I feel a >little frisky." Rini said, giggling very big. Tom: I have a headache *this* big. > "Hey, Meatball Head." Crow: Hey John-boy. > Darien called, referring to Serena's hair that >sported two meatball like knots that held her long pigtails. Mike: Ah, I see Darien knows how to teleport in this fanfic. > "Hi, Darien." Serena smiled. > "Hi, Daddy. Hi Chad." Rini smiled, striking a little pose. Crow: If I had teeth they'd be aching right now. Tom: Ooh, she's doing a #4!! > "Hey, Moppet." Chad smiled. He loved calling her Moppet for she was >little. All: DUH! > Well, maybe he needed a new nick name soon for Rini was as tall as >Serena's breasts. Crow: Gee, if we measure height by Serena I'd be as tall as her-- Mike: Stop right there. > "What's up?" Serena asked. Mike: For some inexplicable reason I have a burning desire to take you up to your room......and do your homework. > "I just heard you need my help Crow: So I rushed here as fast as I could. What's the matter, another youma? Tom: Well, actually..........can you help me with my homework? > and your house was empty. I'd be glad to >help." Darien smiled. Tom: I heard it through the Grape Vine.... > "I wanted to go swimming. Mike: Ooh, I love bottom feeding! > Rini bought her exotic bikini to try on." >Serena smiled. > "It's ok, Mommy. I can go to Darien's where I can wear it for Chad." Crow: Why? He's right there! Mike: Hey, no reading ahead! > Rini >smiled. > Chad smiled too. His wish was coming true! Tom: I've always wanted a Malibu Stacy Dreamhouse! > Mxyzptlk also smiled from his distance. Yes, these kids got their wish big! Mike: I am zenzing zome feelingz of inadequacy. Tell me about your mother. > > "Mi Casa." Chad smiled, letting Rini in. Crow: To our own house of horrors. > "Give me a chance to change, Sweetie," Tom: Time to slip out of these wet clothes and into a dry martini. > she smiled, about to go in the >bathroom. > "Hmmm, wish I could watch." Mike: To which Rini replied, “Eek!!! A pervert!!!” and beat the crap out of him. Crow: Hey, don't use up all the exclamation marks. > Rini was startled, Crow: For good reason. > then smiled big. Tom: Of course she did. > "You want to watch me get naked?" All: NOOOO!!!!!!! > "Ahh...did I say I wanted to watch? Mike: Please don't make me watch, I was only kidding! > Why would I say that?" Tom: Because you're a pedophile? > Chad asked, >puzzled. HE was sure Rini would say no. > "Well...I've let Mommy see me naked many times. Mike: Not according to Serena's lawyers. > I'd take my clothes off >and slip on my bikini." Tom: But I won't. > Rini smiled Crow: Loud smile. > as she unbuttoned her blouse then >lowered her overall straps. > "I wish I could paint you nude." Mike: Now Chad's a Leo wannabe. Crow: Maybe he'll die at the end too! > "Your wish has been granted." Crow: Thank you! Mike: Hey! He didn't mean your wish, Crow. Crow: Damn. > Chad blushed, that voice again! Tom: Now it's whispering sweet nothings in his ear. > "Oh, Chad." Rini said coyly as she took off her bra and only had on her >underwear. "Pull these off." Mike: Or I'll blow your freakin' head off! > "Rini...you are a woman!" Chad sighed Crow: That's a pretty loud sigh. > as he touched her breasts. Rini >smiled as Chad Tom: --realized what he was doing and jumped out the window. > felt them and kissed them. They were nice and round with >pink nipples. Then Chad pulled down her underwear, revealing a beautiful >fully grown golden blonde pussy. Mike: So it's yellow? Tom: Pretty much. > Chad gently stroked it. It even felt wet, >like Rini was thinking sexual thoughts! touched! Crow: Because she didn't! > This is cool, and she is so beautiful. She will be a great >portrait, I'd never want to violate her body.> Tom: Well, technically you have. > HE couldn't resist as he >kissed the pussy, Mike: How'd Diana get there? > making Rini feel so good and relaxed. > "Oh, Chad." Rini sighed Crow: Hmmmmmmmm..........nah, don't wanna run it into the ground. > as she turned around for Chad to touch her bare >bottom. > "You are so beautiful...let your hair down and look sexy." Chad said >eagerly, setting up his easel to paint. HE kept his word and wouldn't do >anything to his young love, she was only 14. Tom: But what he did do could send him away for a couple years. > Rini giggled and took down her rabbit eared hairstyle, letting the hair >fall right down her beautiful bottom. Rini coyly took a strand of her >pink hair and laid her head on it like a pillow, Mike: Ah, how cute! Kill her! > striking a lovely adorable >pose. Rini was so proud Chad painted her entirely nude, her beautiful >golden blonde pussy shining Crow: It's the 14 karat pussy! > and her breasts staying in perfect stillness. >Rini didn't even feel embarrassed, Tom: Because it's not in the script. > and briefly wondered why she felt like >being naked around Chad? He was handsome...but to be nude like this? Rini >shrugged her shoulders. Chad was very respectful, Mike: Yeah, they always start out that way then BAM! Drawing nude pictures of little girls with pink hair. > he just wanted to paint >her nude, not have sex for she was 14 after all! Crow: Oh, I getcha! Tom: Really? Crow: No, just had to say something to that. > Art was after all far >different then sex and there were many portraits of nudity. Tom: Why can’t he just hire a prostitute like every other painter? > > "Finished." Serena sighed as she got up, about to put her notebooks away. > Darien smiled, he was glad to have helped Serena. Serena has indeed >improved, she was so eager to pass school now and be a graceful woman >instead of acting so clumsy. > He was proud to see how she took care of Rini, >like a real mother. Crow: Because she is-- Mike: We know, Crow. > The girls rarely fought and enjoyed each other, Tom: You don't say. > sharing >a bedroom, bathroom, and private moments being a family. Mike: Or committing incest. Crow: They're one in the same with this guy. > To Darien's delight, Serena bent down to pick up her notebook she dropped, >revealing her thighs! Crow: Not to mention her huge butcrack. > He could make out the outlines of her bottom that >really turned him on. "That is so lovely, I wish you were naked." > "Your wish is granted." Tom: Prepare for deep hurting! > "Huh?" Darien was startled, who was that voice? Mike: Are you hearing the voices again dear? > "Darien," Serena said slyly, sticking a leg up on her desk and looking >down at Darien, smiling. "Did you want to see me naked?" > "I asked that? I mean, yes. I mean..no." Crow: Yes...no...maybe...Oh, I don't know you decide! > Darien stammered. > "I have to admit I have thought of sex. Tom: And I'll have to admit, I live for it! > I have protection and I have >grown up quite big." Crow: Isn't that Darien's line? > Serena smiled, reaching in her skirt and pulling down >her underwear! Then she lifted it, Mike: So, she pulled it back on? > revealing her bare bottom. This was >weird for Serena, Crow: I'm beginning to get an unnatural loathing for this guy. Tom: Seems perfectly natural to me. > now she wanted sex? Sure she talked about it to Rini, and >now...now she wanted to open up! Explore the locked up fantasies that needed >to be released! Tom: Yeah, go crazy. > Darien opened up her bottom. Mike: Ewww......better get the Preparation H. > IT smelled so nice Tom: No comment. > as it began licking the >inside. Crow: The inside of what? Tom: Do you really wanna go there, Crow? Crow: No. > Serena had such a cute pink area inside her bottom and it tasted >great Crow: Wow, I didn't know Darien liked-- Mike: NO! > as his tongue licked her little hole. Darien turned her around and >pulled her skirt down, Tom: But wasn't it already...? > revealing her golden blonde pussy. Darien patted it >in awe as Serena lifted her leg. Mike: And let loose a golden blonde stream of urine-- Crow: Do you need a timeout? > She took his fingers and inserted them >right in her clit, underneath her pussy. > Luna said nothing as she putted a paw over her eyes. Boy, the Princess >has really opened up big time! Tom: You could say that! > But she was glad to see Serena knew safe sex >as she handed Darien a condom. Crow: Which he promptly used to make a poodle. Tom: Yeah, I heard he does birthdays and barmitzvahs. > Darien took his own clothes off and soon, >they were both naked and making love that Luna wished she couldn't >hear... Tom: Ah, someone who shares our pain. > such vulgar language Serena had!! Boy, where did she pick up those >naughty words? Mike: From you maybe? > is very wrong if one person makes a wish and it is granted. Crow: This whole thing is wrong! > I hope it's not >the Dark Moon Negaverse, I do hear that Alyssa is a big fan of sexual >foreplay among her servants!> Luna said with worry. Tom: I think that was a thought. Crow: Yeah, could be. > Something was indeed >strange as Serena bounced happily on Darien, Mike: Boingy, boingy, boingy! Tom: She's turned into a rubber woman! AHHHHH!!!!! > her bottom going up and down. >Luna decided to take a long walk, Crow: Off a short pier. > trying not to blush as she could still >hear Serena cry out for more. "More Darien! Tom: And put wings on it! > I am the Princess, you better >please me!" Serena had screamed. Mike: Gee, who does that sound like I wonder? > "Oh boy, Serena. I am so glad your parents are not here to see >this... Crow: Well, that depends on Darren's definition of family fun. > your earthly mom would have a heart attack...and I'd hate to see >Kenji in action! Tom: Ugh, bad mental image! > Sammy, boy, he'd blab to everyone!" Mike: He squeals as bad as Serena. > Luna said as she took >a walk. Crow: On the wild side. > > Amy was having the fun of her life Tom: She discovered Goldeneye. > as she was fully naked Mike: As opposed to partially naked. > and dancing in >front of Greg who filmed everything! She became Sailor Mercury when Greg >came over and actually took off all her clothes! Crow: But, if they take off their uniforms don't they turn back to normal? > You are 16, why are you frolicking naked? Mike: Cuz it's fun. > You >are a dedicated student, not a strip go go girl. Crow: But what if she's the dedicated student of a strip go go girl? Tom: Like Elizabeth Berkley? > Stop!> her mind had cried. > But the more Amy tried to stop, Tom: The louder the author laughed. > the more she wanted to please Greg. She >actually touched herself and letted Greg touch her too! Mike: Wow, I've never seen someone get so excited over a handshake...... > Amy even sat on his >lap and Crow: Told him what she wanted for Christmas. > did sexual acts that pleased Greg so much, he could nearly feel his >dick trying to rip through his pants. Tom: Ah, one of the lesser known side effect of Viagra. > Amy eagerly turned around and letted >Greg touch the inside of her bottom. Mike: Well...... Tom: Something went wrong around here somewhere. > Amy encouraged him to pull hard and >harder, give her more. Crow: Pull what? > Greg watched Amy do many undescribable X-rated acts, >and he filmed them all! Tom: Oh, the porn possibilities. Mike: Maybe she's auditioning for a part on Venus 5? > "Oh Amy, I never knew you were such a wild girl! I only wish I knew why we >are doing this, this is so unlike us." Mike: Shivo knows this is wrong, yet he went ahead anyway? Tom: He makes a good character assassin. > Greg sighed, watching Amy lay on the >floor and rub her pussy hard. Crow: Rub it with what? Sandpaper? > Greg removed her hand Tom: Hands off, it's mine! > and then he began to >rub it. Mike: With a cheese grater. > Amy had actually shaved all the hair off her pussy, making it >smooth for Greg to touch. Crow: Greg must have really delicate skin. Tom: What's this?! A HAIR!! > "Oh! Oh! Tom: Oh? Mike and Crow: Green Giant! > I wish you were naked! I wish you'd join me!" Amy said eagerly as >she began to bounce. Mike: Apparently Amy's made out of rubber too. Crow: I guess that's the only way she'd do this scene. > She did her best to hold the juices in, Crow: The juice must not be let loose. > she really >wanted a good one! Tom: So do we, but we always end up with fanfics like this. > "Your wish has been granted." Tom: Go in peace. > Amy looked very startled as she stopped bouncing. Mike: Her shocks gave out. > Was there someone in >her house as she stood up. Crow: Uh huh. > Then she saw Greg was getting his condom on. Tom: Having to hold the magnifying glass made things a little tricky. > "Safe sex, Amy. I want you healthy and disease free." Greg said as he >inserted his condom right in her bottom! Mike: He’s really knows his way around a condom, doesn’t he? > "Oh, Greg! Oh yes!" Amy cried, forgetting Crow: Her lines. > the voice she had heard. She >heard of sex and it was indeed good! It was fun and not painful for the >condom was so gentle on her insides. Boy, maybe she was working too hard, >she needed to relax, and this was so good! Tom: Working at Hooters sounds rough. > Greg repositioned the condom in >her clit. Mike: How did he do it? The world doesn’t want to know. > "Greg...Send me to Mercury! Crow: Just get me out of this lemon! > Do me big! Do me big!" Tom: Sure thing ma'am, are the walls melting for you too? > Amy cried, laying on >the couch and opening wide. Crow: Unfortunately, she opened to wide and spill all her guts on the floor. Tom: What a shame. > Greg did what he was told. Mike: The fanfic having sucked the will out of him. > He heard Amy scream >and cry, begging for Crow: An ending, a scene change, anything to get out of this scene! > more and don't stop. Amy had never felt so good...to >scream, to cry, to use vulgar language she had kept bottled up for so long. Mike: Actually, that wouldn't surprise me. >Amy gripped the couch hard, she could feel it coming. Tom: The couch is coming? Crow: Neat. > "Oooooh!" Amy cried. She couldn't hold the juices anymore! Crow: So she dropped them. Mike: I think I'm going to be sick. > She was going >to come! All: HUZZAH! > She was going to have the biggest orgasm ever! Tom: Better get Ripley's on the phone. Crow: Believe it.........or not. Mike: What about Lita's? Wasn't it the 'biggest'? Crow: Get Guinness on the phone. > "Ooooh, yes! Yes! >Come on pussy, yes! Yes!" Crow: Faster pussycat! Thrill thrill! > Amy screamed, feeling white liquid coming out all >over her bottom. > Amy felt so much better as Greg cleaned up her wet juices >that spilled out like syrup. Mike: Yum, rich mapley goodness. Crow: You know, I could go for a waffle. Tom: You can still think about food after *that*? > "Oh, Amy. That was great." Greg sighed as he dried Amy with a towel. > "Oh, Crow: Darren. > Greg. It was. I love having sex, I feel so relaxed!" Amy sighed, >putting Greg on top of her and kissing him long and hard. She felt a thrill Tom: As electricity coursed through her body..... >as Greg started to rub her red hot pussy Mike: Owowowowowowow............. Tom: Yeah, that sounds healthy. No problems here, uh uh. > and wouldn't stop until she >released all her juices. Crow: Must have OJ.....suffering from....scurvy...... Tom: Talking....like......Shatner. > "How's this?" Chad smiled as Rini putted on her dress. Tom: Well.....it kinda sucks. > Rini smiled in awe, it was perfect. Mike: Great. What is it? > She stood fully nude, Crow: Except for the dress. > the sunlight >reflecting her beautiful 14 year old body, showing off her beautiful golden >blonde pussy and her creamy still breasts. Tom: Yes, they're still breasts. So? > Rini's head was laid on her hair, >striking a lovely pose. "I don't know why I was so nervous being nude. Mike: Why do I keep hearing this voice in the back of my head screaming that what we did was wrong? Tom: Oh, that's your conscience. Don't worry, it goes away after awhile. > Thank you." she said, giving him a kiss. > "Do you really have to go?" Crow: Don't leave me alone with the fanfic! > "Yes. Mommy may need more help with homework. I love helping her." Tom: She's so inferior! MWAHAHAHAHAHA! > "You know...I'd like to paint you both nude...mother and daughter. Would >you like that?" All: NO!! > "Yes, Chad. I'd be honored...but Uncle Ken. Man, I wish he'd love you and >Darien more. Mike: Please, don't. I just ate several hours ago. > Serena and I are old enough to date whoever we want." Crow: At least, that's what that nice Mr. Kennedy told me. > "Your wish has been granted, little princess." > Rini's eyes widened. Who said that? Tom: The contrivance faeries. > "I'll still be honored to paint you and Serena. Mike: Oh ok, you horndog you. > Think about it, it would >be special...a loving mother and her lovely daughter." Chad said softly, >kissing her. Crow: Where? Mike: I don't wanna know. > "I'd love it...my Mommy nude with love, and me...nude with love." Rini >sighed. Yes, she would love a nude portrait. Who cared of Uncle Kenji, if >he hated it, fine. Tom: He'll just kick us out of the house and beat the crap out of Chad...sayyyyyyy... > But it was their lives and they said yes. > > Raye couldn't get over how nice Chad was today! Mike: Guess that Prozac I put in his coffee finally kicked in. > He fed her a wonderful >breakfast, Crow: He even helped her chew. > he helped clean the temple without falling all over the place, Tom: You know, Sailor Moon never needed an Urkel. Crow: Yeah, they had Serena. >helped her with school work from TA, Mike: T&A? > helped her with Aerobics by being her >coach, gave her a beautiful song, and even washed her school uniform. Crow: He is so whipped. > "Here, Raye, a heat pad if your back acts up." Tom: And here's a lead pipe if *I* act up. > Chad said politely. > "Thank you, Chad." Raye said, putting it by her bed. She'll fill it with >hot water later. Mike: Well, what else would she do with it? Crow: Betcha she makes it into a whoopie cushion or something. > "Do you need anything else? I can run to the store for you." Crow: Need a kidney? I got two ya know. Tom: Nah, maybe later. > "No, I'm ok, Chad. I'll call if I need you. Go help Grandpa." Tom: Translation: Get the hell out of my room, wormy. > "Sure, Raye." Chad said as he left. Mike: Yes, master. > It hit Raye! Crow: OW! > The Great Fire! Tom: Big Fire? > It can tell her who that voice was, why >didn't she think of that? Mike: Because Darren made her a dullard? > Raye had on her Shinto Robes as she entered the >big room and lit her fire. Crow: So that's what they call it these days. > The fire burned big and bright as Raye sat cross >legged and putted her hands together, concentrating hard. Tom: Om, Om on the range...... > "Oh Great Fire who burns bright, Mike: I wish I may, I wish I might. > give me a vision on the weird events >around me. Crow: Hey! That didn't rhyme! > Please give me a vision on invades our thoughts and present me >with a face." Tom: Not only does it tell the future, it does plastic surgery! > The flames burned bright, and then Raye's eyes flew open as a black hair, Mike: Ewww....an eyelash. >curly haired man with a goatee beard and earrings appeared in front of Raye! >TO Raye's shock, Crow: FROM Crow's libido. > he blew out the Great Fire! Tom: Hope he made a wish. > "Really, Raye, you can't see >me yet with your little flames. That is unfair." Mike: And of course, the best way to keep hidden is to appear right in front of her. > "Who are you, evil spirit? I demand you tell me!" Raye ordered. Crow: Some Buffalo Wings, dripping in sauce. Tom: Yum! > "Or what, Sailor Mars. I know who you all are." Tom: After all, he's the writer. > Raye was horror stricken, this guy knew her as Sailor Mars, and Serena and >the others! Mike: Yeah, we know. > "How do you know who we are? Who are you?" > The evil face laughed. Crow: If he's a face, how could he blow out the fire? Mike: That's not an easy question to answer little buddy. Crow: So, in other words, I should just forget about it? Mike: Works for me. > "Why not ask your pal Clark Kent? Or Lois Lane? Mike: Why don't you lick me? >Refer to me as the 'imp,' Tom: Or you can just call me Howie. > they will tell you who I am. Heh heh heh heh heh >heh heh." Crow: I'm guessing this guy likes Beavis and Buthead. Mike: Yeah, omnipotent beings just love a good 'wood' joke. > "Well, whoever you are, you leave my thoughts! I am a private girl, how >dare you let Chad see me naked!" Raye yelled, her voice deep with anger Mike: She's doing a Barry White impression! Tom: Can't get enough of your love, baby..... > and >hatred her privacy was violated. > "But, Raye, I am not evil as you see me. I am like a God. Tom: Ego detected! Pattern Blue! Crow: You sure this isn't SI? > You and your >friends have secret hidden thoughts, and I believe you need to be honest. Crow: Tell us Raye, how do you know Monica? >You all have dreams of being touched, but you are to afraid. Mike: Of the author. > I am giving >you all your dreams...like being nude." > "I am not one of Howard Stern's girls that is willing to go on a radio >show and flash her body all over the place! Tom: Obviously not a Stern fan. > I am a private girl, Crow: Have I mentioned they're private enough? > so are my >friends! Our bodies are beautiful and private, Crow: Alright, that'll hold me for a while. > how dare you imply our >boyfriends want to see us nude and have sex! Mike: He didn't have to imply that now did he? Tom: Yeah, they seemed pretty eager to me. > Our sexual thoughts, if we have >any, should be kept private Crow: Haha! Fooled you! > and never mentioned!" Raye yelled. > "Face it, you wanted Chad to see you naked. Tom: Um...no, she didn't. Mike: Even the author doesn't care anymore. > You could've taken off your >little shirt and putted on a robe." > "That is a lie! My back hurted, I never saw Chad come in for you >distracted me!" Crow: What with the wind blowing and all. > "Well, I also gave your friends some sexual thoughts for they wished them. >I must say, you Tokyo teenagers are just as naughty as the USA girls. Mike: I tell you, kids these days.... > I >hope you all don't end up pregnant or getting STD, I can just see the large >Sailor Scouts, heh heh heh heh." Tom: Well, they haven't yet, what with all those lemons and all. > "What did you do to my friends?" Crow: Other than debase them and write them out of character? > "Oh...Serena wanted to be normal and have Darien touch her, and Lita and Amy asked for a romp. I do believe Mina is falling on her face. Mike: Wow, I've never heard of that position... > Even >Rabbit was...naughty." Crow: Must....refrain....from....spanking....comment. Mike: Thank you! > Raye was angry, how dare he say a vulgar thought of her best friend Rini! Tom: So all this witty banter was telepathic? Crow: Could be. >She picked up her anti-evil scroll. Mike: As opposed to her Dead Sea scroll. > "Mars! Fireballs! Charge!" she >screamed, throwing the scroll at the face. > The face laughed as the scroll Tom: Tickled him. > did nothing! "No! That is impossible!" Raye >gasped. > "I will see you girls in battle, if you are not thinking bad thoughts. Mike: So if they think good thoughts he'll come? Crow: Think unsexy thoughts, think unsexy thoughts.... >Heh heh heh heh heh heh." as he vanished. Yes, that was a fun conversation >for Mxyzptlk. Tom: He's a very lonely omnipotent being. Crow: Maybe he could hook with the Q and bug Star Trek. > Raye ran to her room and got out of Shinto Robes. She quickly got dressed >and ran out of her Temple. She had to call Lois and Clark, ask of this >'imp,' but she had to see Serena. The guy said he took away her powers, did >that mean he took out Sailor Moon? Mike: You know, that was like something from a Crystal Knight fic. Crow: Dr. Thinker, Oscar, Crystal Knight....3 crappy writers in one! > > Rini was about to get a shocking surprise as she was about to open >Serena's door. Crow: SURPRISE!! Tom: AHHHHHH!!!!!! > She heard moaning and gasped! Tom: Wait, she gasped when she moaned? Crow: No, she moaned while she gasped. Mike: Uh uh, they moaned, she gasped. Bots: Oh.... > Serena was naked, and Darien >was naked! Her parents were having sex! Mike: Yes, we know. > That was not to be... Crow: Hey, we didn't like it either! > they were older >when they touched each other! Tom: So, now touching is a euphemism for sex. Mike: Seems like. > "Mommy! Daddy!" she said in shock and hurt. How could they? Mike: How dare they conceive me?! Crow: She's as pissed as we are. > "Rini, no, we can explain." Serena said, getting out and quickly hugging >the sobbing Rini. > "We didn't mean!" Darien said, putting a pillow over his wet dick. All: YAAAAAHHHHHH!!!!!! > "But you are 16, Mommy. You touched him when you were older...I was born >in the 30th century, I know I was." Crow: At least that's what the Doctor told me. > Rini sobbed. > "Oh, Rini, I'm sorry. I am so sorry. Tom: Keep saying it, come on....... > But it was safe sex, honey. See?" >Serena held up a wet condom. All: YAAAAAHHHHHH!!!!! Tom: Don't do that! > "I won't be pregnant or hurt, I was very >careful. I am healthy, have no cuts, and I don't shave under my hair. Mike: Oy... Tom: If anybody who can figure that out, please tell us. > "Mommy, it isn't fair. I love sex...but to see you and Daddy..." Rini >choked under her sobs. Crow: Oh god...she's actually jealous! I'm gonna hurl.... Tom: Under her sobs? > "Rini, you shouldn't cry. Sex is beautiful, you will be born out of me >when it comes up in the future. You could say Darien and I practiced. I do >love Darien deeply, honey. I'm so sorry you caught this..." Tom: Horrible disfiguring disease..... > Serena choked, Tom: Rini! Crow: Tux-boy! Mike: Both. >she was so shameful she had sex and poor Rini had caught her. > "I wish I was older! I want to understand more of sex." Rini sobbed, and >then screamed when a yellow glow zapped her! Crow: It's a sign from God! Tom: Yeah, smite her piddly ass! Mike: Guys..... > "Rini!" Darien exclaimed, after getting his pants on. The glow zapped him >back! Mike: Must have been all that friction. Static electricity you know. > "Mommy!" Rini cried in horror, throwing out her gold watch. Tom: Could you set the alarm for me? > Serena knew why she did that, they needed Superman, now! Crow: No particular reason though. Just for the hell of it. > "Lois, Clark, >Rini is glowing... Mike: I always knew she was a mutant. > we can't touch her! Tom: A little late for that isn't it? > Help her!" she cried as she pressed >the button. Tom: Who's button? > > Lois and Clark were about to go home in Lois' Cherokee Truck Mike: Any guesses on what the author drives? > when Clark >felt a sound enter his head... Mike: Sounds painful. > and Lois could hear it too! Crow: How, you ask? Wouldn't you like to know! Mike: I wouldn't, actually. > "Clark, Lois, Rini is glowing, we can't touch her! Help us, please!" >Serena cried. Tom: Seen it. > "Serena needs us." Lois exclaimed, Mike: Why do I get the feeling the author's the only one who cares? > locking the truck door. > "Wait, you heard her! How?" Clark asked. Crow: Good question. Mike: Oh, wouldn't you know it! They set it on speaker phone. > "I...heard it. Clark, is it a sign I may be Ultra Woman..when Serena is >in trouble?" Lois asked, fascinated that she heard the clear voice as clear >as day. Mike: Anybody out there buying this? > "We'll need to get there, Superman speed. I'll have to go fast." Tom: I feel the need, the need for expeditious velocity. > Clark >said as he spun around Mike: And came up short. > and became Superman. Lois putted Clark's glasses in >her suit jacket pocket. > "I'll hold on tight, let's go." Lois said hurriedly, praying that Rini was >not dying! > Holding Lois tightly, Superman flew to New Tokyo as fast as he can to >Serena's house. Crow: So it's New Tokyo now. What the hell happened to Tokyo? > "Serena! We need to...Rini!" Tom: No, we've done that enough, thank you. > Raye gasped, spotting the little girl in a >yellow light. > "We can't touch her." Serena sobbed. Mike: I hope those are tears of joy. > "Let me try..it won't hurt. Crow: Unless I screw up, then it won't matter will it? > Scroll Power! I call Upon the power of Mars! >Fireballs! Charge! Remove this glow from my little friend!" Tom: This is my little friend! > Raye threw the >paper on Rini, but it zapped out! Mike: The paper, the glow, Raye, or Rini? > "She's growing!" Darien exclaimed as Rini began to get bigger! Her >overalls snapped and her blouse ripped off. Her bra snapped like a rubber >band along with her underwear! Crow: She's hulking out! Tom: Rini smash! > Rini stood at 6 feet tall, with long pink >pigtails as long as Serena's! Tom: So basically, she's Serena with pink hair. > Rini saw herself naked and blushed heavily >over her new body that had filled out! Then..it was over! Crow: Great! Bye! Mike: Sit down. > "Mommy." Rini whispered, putting her hands on her bare body. Crow: Can't wait to take it for a spin, huh? > "You...grew." Serena whispered. > "Rini...oh my." Luna gasped, blushing over the tall nude girl. Mike: Well.... Crow: I'll let that one pass. > "This has >been the weirdest day I have ever had. What happened?" Tom: Has that nasty hermaphrodite been poking around again? > "She...grew. Some glow grew her." Crow: Achieve astounding results with Miracle Glow! > Darien said, starring at his nude >daughter. Rini blushed and covered her nude body with a blanket. Mike: Just what kind of pervert does he think Darien is anyway? Crow: Need you ask? > "What happened here?" Raye asked. Tom: Darien was being written out of character. > "Well..." Luna gasped. How do you tell Raye the Princess had sex? Crow: The princess had sex. Tom: Wow, that was easy. > "Mommy had sex." Rini simply said. Her voice was a little different. Mike: Well, duh. She just went through puberty at the speed of light. > "What in the...How could you?" Tom: Um...I was drunk? > Raye asked angrily. "Serena, can't you >watch what you are thinking?!" Crow: No, can you? > "Raye, ask of Rini." Luna said, preventing a fight. Mike: Er, how exactly? > There was a loud smash as Serena's window blew out and Superman and Lois >Lane crashed in. Crow: Noone expects the Spanish Inquisition! Tom: Oh good, the comic relief is here. > "Clark!" Raye exclaimed, helping him up. > "Lois! Are you ok?" Serena quickly asked. > "Oh I'm fine. Going through a closed window is a breeze." Lois said, >wiping glass off her business suit. Tom: Was that sarcasm? Mike: Let's just assume it was and go on. > "Serena! Leave your window open next time." Mike: Oh yeah, blame the distraught mother for your stupidity. > Superman said, shaking glass >out of his cape. This was the 2nd time he did that, the first was when he >was blind and Lois had moved him to the right in the wrong place and he >crashed through a window. Tom: So what's his excuse this time? > "That was my fault, Clark. Serena was having sex...and I closed it for >she uttered bad words." Luna said sheepishly. > "Whoa!" Crow: Way to much information! > Lois exclaimed. "Serena, you jumped in the sack?" Tom: I wouldn't say 'jumped' exactly....more like flew. > "Ah, we should ask that later." Superman said, blushing big. Mike: Better yet, forget it ever happened. > "Right. Rini got big." Tom: Me Serena, you Jane. > Serena said, revealing the 18 year old Rini who >was 6 feet and very embarrassed over her new body parts. Crow: So that's what he means by 6 feet! > "Rini." Lois whispered. > "Don't come near me! Mike: I'm contagious! > I'm naked!" Rini said, turning away from Lois, tears >coming out of her eyes in shame. > "Rini, honey." Lois said gently, wrapping her arms around the cocoon >blanket. Tom: If Wilford Brimley show's up.... > Rini began to sob again in Lois' arms. "I hate to say this..but >Clark has to scan you." Crow: The hell? > "No!" Rini screamed. > "Rini, this is us, Lois and Clark. What Clark sees, I won't be offended >of your nudity. Mike: The audience on the other hand... > He has to see if you're ok, Serena was scared to see you >glow. We have to see how you got big." Tom: Ah, more wish fulfillment here. > "Rini, I am like a doctor, Crow: Sure, a lousy doctor with no training but still..... > I have to scan your whole body. I won't touch >you, I'll just use my x-ray vision, I won't have any action, Mike: So he's not going to do anything? > I swear it." >Superman said gently. He nodded at Lois. Tom: I think she'll buy that. > Lois tried not to blush, Crow: Sayyyyy..... > but had to assure Rini Clark wouldn't do anything >funny. "Rini, honey, Clark has seen me nude, and I am married. Mike: Yeah, to Clark! Tom: How's that supposed to comfort her anyway? > There is no >shame in being nude. I bet you look pretty." Mike: Not a word Crow. Crow: What? Mike: Not one word. > Rini smiled a little. Tom: So being hit on makes her happy? Crow: What have you been reading? > "Come on, that's it. Let me remove the blanket." > "Not Daddy! Only Mommy sees me nude." Rini declared. Crow: It's a little late for that, isn't it? > "I won't look." Darien said, turning away. > Lois removed the blanket, revealing Rini nude. Mike: Tada! > Rini really filled out, >she had at least a D size cup breast, Tom: Wait a minute, I thought _Mina_ was the one falling on her face! Mike: Remember The Eye of Argon? Crow: What I wouldn't give for Grignr to show up right now... > a full bushy blonde pussy, Crow: Ok, so it isn't dye. I guess she really _is_ a mutant. > and her >hair now had long ponytailed ropes instead of the big fluffy pigtails Rini >was more used to. Superman scanned Rini up and down with the x-ray vision. Mike: Damn, she moved. Guess I'll just have to do it again! >"From what I can scan, Rini is now 18 years old," he said. Tom: Brillant deduction Holmes! Crow: Couldn't he ogle her through the blanket? > "But she's 14! She was 12 last year!" Serena exclaimed. Crow: That's....just amazing. What the hell happened to 13 anyway? Tom: Yeah, just another example of fanfic proofreading right there. > "I'm naked. Why am I naked?" Mike: Because you don't have any clothes on. Next! > Rini asked, bending down, trying to hide her >new body. > "Here, will this cheer you up?" Superman smiled, removing Tom: His head? > his red cape and >giving it to Rini to wrap her body in. > "Thank you, Clark." Rini said eagerly, wrapping the cape around her whole >body and feeling happy. She got Superman's red cape! Crow: Defense +3! Tom: Why am I reminded of the beginning to the Knights of Xentar? > "Wait, though Rini is 18, maybe she can be 14." Luna said. > "Really? I can be 14 again?" Rini asked hopefully. Mike: Unfortunately yes. > "You'll still be 18 until we find out what made you big, Tom: Or until the end. > but by using the >Luna Disguise Pen, and if it works, you'll be 14 again." Luna said, bringing >out Serena's pen. Crow: Hey, isn't Serena the one who should be using it? > "But will it work on Rini?" Serena asked. Mike: No, I just _love_ doing that. > "Yes it will, it worked on Mina to save you, Serena." Luna said. > "What do I say?" Rini asked, keeping her body covered as she held up the pen. Crow: Come on Rini, just say 'Disguise Power, turn me into Newt Gingrich!' > "Just say Disguise Power, Turn me into a 14 year old girl." Luna said. Crow: Mine was better. > "Ah, could you turn around, Clark? I'm a private girl." Rini said, >blushing big. Tom: I'm surprised she can still say that with a straight face. > "I understand perfectly, Rini. We are friends, and friends do need >privacy." Superman smiled, giving her a kiss on the cheek as he turned around. > Rini letted the cape fall off her as she stood up, fully nude. She held >up the pen as everyone hoped she would be young again. Mike: For some reason, I can't raise even an iota of interest. > "Disguise Power! Turn me into a normal 14 year old girl!" Crow: Normal?! Uh uh, even that thing has it's limits. > The pen flashed its colors and soon, Tom: You know, those transformation sequences don't have as much impact on text. > Rini was now 14 again, still fully nude. > "Awww, that is so cute. You are 14 and have nice breasts and a golden >pussy." Lois said, smiling. She couldn't resist. Mike: Oh....crap! Crow: Excuse me. Tom: What happened? Crow: Not much. Just remember these few simple words: In space, noone can hear you scream. > "I'm a growing girl, Lois! Crow: Well, technically she isn't since she's 18 and all... > You leave my pussy alone, Tom: Put...the...cat...down.... > only Mommy gets to >see it." Mike: Forgot about Chad already, have we? Tom: Can't blame her. > Rini smiled, hugging Serena close. "I'm not mad anymore of you and >Darien..we just made wishes and they came true. I love you Mommy." Crow: Love you, hellspawn. > Serena picked up the giggling nude teenager. "I love you too." > "I need my cape, I'm naked." Rini said, blushing big. Tom: Just...a...few...more...lines... > "Don't be shy, but you are cute." Superman smiled, handing Rini his cape. > "Well, am I pretty?" Rini asked coyly, letting Serena set her down and >striking a pose. Mike: I guess she isn't shy anymore. Bots: Uhg....... > "You are pretty. You're going to grow up healthy like your mom." Superman >smiled. Rini went over and gave him a big kiss. Then wrapped Superman's >cape around her body. Tom: Oh yeah, nearly forgot about that. Hehehe..... > "Wait...you said you made a wish." Lois said. > "We all did, Lois. Weird things have happened." Crow: No, not weird. The word you're looking for is 'gratuitous'. Tom: 'Stupid' would work too. Mike: How would Raye know what the rest were up to anyway? > Raye said. "I met this >man in my temple, a face with curly black hair and a beard. He said he >knows what we are thinking and gives us what we think of. I asked for Chad >to be normal, Grandpa to let me date, and someone to rub my back that popped >out." Mike: Thank god that wasn't 'pooped out'. > "Oooooh, who did it?" Serena squealed. Tom: Colonel Mustard, in the kitchen, with the candlestick. > "Chad. He was gentle." Raye smiled as Serena gave her a big hug. > "You said...you wished. Serena, Darien, Rini, tell me everything you >thought of today." Superman said. Crow: Ummm....sex. Tom: Sex! Sexsexsexsexsex! Mike: Uh, baseball. > "Well, I was tired last night from moon dusting Queen Alyssa's monster Mike: So naturally I wanted to relax with a nice relaxing bout of sex. > so >I wished I was normal.. All: HAHAHAHAHA!!! Tom: Thank you, I needed that! > being alone with Darien...and...oh my God! Tom: I've never seen such a small-- Mike: Ahem. > I wished >to have sex!" Serena exclaimed in horror. Crow: The horror....the horror...... > What had she done? Who invaded >her thoughts and made her open up like that? Mike: Ok, one more time! One...two...three! All: It's the author! > "And I wanted to touch her!" Darien added in horror. Who did this to >them? How dare someone exploit his private thoughts! > "I wanted to be a lady, Tom: Since when? > Chad wished he could see me change to my bikini, >I let him paint me nude, what is going on?" Rini exclaimed, her fluffy >ponytails going up in horror. Crow: Eek. Tom: Now I have seen everything. > "Oh my God." Lois said, putting a hand on her mouth. "Clark...he's back." > "Who's back?" Raye asked. Mike: My great-uncle Floyd. > Superman picked up Serena's notebook Tom: Dear Diary, today I ran into this rather wormy guy named Darren Shivo.... > and drew a quick sketch at super speed. > "Raye, did you see this man?" > "That's him! That's the man!" Raye exclaimed, recognizing the hair, beard, >velvet jacket, and earrings. Crow: Oh, it's that nice Satan fellow again. > "Who is he so I can Moon Dust him?" Serena asked. Mike: He...is...BIROC! > "It's...Mxyzptlk. Mr. Mxyzptlk." Superman whispered. Tom: Ladies and gentlemen, our first plot point. Mike and Crow: Yay. > > Well, now that the face has a name, Crow: And the name has a face, and vice versa. > what is Mr. Mxyzptlk up to? Mike: Oh, I'd say about 12 packs a day by now. > What kind >of plans does he have? Tom: Will he go to college, will he marry Suzy... > Will the girls think anymore sexual thoughts? Crow: Will you jump up my butt? > How >can Serena, Lita, and Amy deal with the fact they had sex at age 16? Mike: Intense family counseling? Tom: Drugs and lots of 'em? Crow: A baseball bat and a Kenny G album? > Will >Serena get to be Sailor Moon again? Tom: Don't see any reason why not. > Why are Xena, Gabrielle, Hercules, and >Iolaus appearing in this story? Crow: To toy with our minds, perhaps? > Can I keep this from becoming X-rated? Mike: Hell no. Tom: It's a little late to be worrying about that isn't it? >Well, read part 2 and find out, Xena, Gabrielle, Hercules and Iolaus lend a >hand. Mike: Crow.... Crow: What?! Mike: Oh, sorry! > Look for an unforgettable appearance by Calisto and Hope, they are up to >no good as well thanks to Galaxy. Tom: Boy, that sentence sure does get around... Mike: Well, it's over. Crow: Then let's get the hell out of here. I feel dirty. *..1..2..3..4..5..6 Tom is standing near the console holding a half-filled cup of coffee in his hand. He trembles slightly as he takes a drink, then begins mumbling something under his breath. “Hey Tom...what’s that?” Mike said as he entered stage right. “Oh,himikeit’sgyspy’sspecialblend,andiloveit!Bwehehehehehehe!Youshouldtryitmike,it’llre allywakeyouup!Wheeeeee!!!!!” Tom said as he guesticulated wildly, sending black coffee sloshing over the rim. “Ok, I think you’ve had enough for now.” Mike said as he took the cup out of Tom’s hand. “Crow, could you come in here please?” Crow walked in wearing a pink robe and a towel around his head. “Better make it quick Mike, that water isn’t getting any warmer.” “I just wanted to know what you guys thought about today’s experiment.” “Hmmmm.....where to begin? The spelling was terrible, not to mention the grammar, and all the characters were out of character, even the one’s he made up!” Crow growled. “The only thing good about it was the fact that he had the characters use condoms!” “Ok, what about you Tom?” Mike asked. “Welllllll......A Sailor Moon/Louis and Clark crossover’s pretty much doomed from the beginning, Mike. It just seemed to me that the author used the story to get some thrills while hiding behind a theme about the scout’s budding sexuality.” “Ok, great. So we’re agreed that it bites then?” Mike said as he looked at his robot pals. “Yeah, now gimme my coffee.” Tom said as he looked longingly at the cup in Mike’s hand. Mike held the cup in the air and away from Tom, then looked at the camera. “Oh, it’s the evil ones again. What do you think sirs?” Dr. F leered at the hexfield while Frank, still wearing the walkman, hummed an incomprehensible tune in the background. “So Nelson, how are you holding up?” Dr. F asked with mock concern. “Everybody's doing fine Doc. That lemon was bad, but not that bad,” Mike replied. “Yeah, our wills are only _half_ broken,” Crow muttered under his breath as he walked out of the room. “Aw, what a shame Nelson. Now I guess I'll just have to send the rest of the parts to you! Frank! Hit the button and turn off that radio!” Dr. F yelled as Frank grinned goofily and hit the button. Mike: So what’s in this? Tom: Colombian Supreme and a box of No-Doze. Mike: Oh... Well, it took a while but it’s done! This is my first msting with prose segments, if you couldn’t tell already ;) Now for the important stuff. Nothing in this fanfic belongs to me, expect maybe the inventions. The fic belongs to Darren Shivo, who’s ‘borrowing’ characters owned by Naoko Takeuchi and DC comics. JackAcid, if you’re reading this, sorry but I got tired of waiting. If you want, you can Meta-mst this or make a Mach 2. Eric J. Schepers Streetfighter’s Dojo: http://www.geocities.com/TelevisionCity/Set/4052